Use Instant Messaging (IM) properly with consideration for the other person - GoFuckYourself.com

Jace · 09-05-2005, 07:25 PM

Many of the issues that apply to e-mail apply to Instant Messaging and visa-versa. The key is courtesy and clarity in your communications.

1. Start by always asking if the person you are IMing is available and if it is a good time to chat. I get e-mail all the time from folks who get frustrated by others who think they should be available 24/7 or whenever they choose to be online. If the person you want to IM with is busy, ask them when they will be free. You do the same - if you are busy and cannot chat, let the other person know and advise them when you can connect at a later time so that they can have your full attention.

2. Practice communicating briefly and succinctly. Clarity is a skill that needs to be worked on when it comes to the short messages generally used with IM. IM is meant for brief communications - not your manifesto on the days events. If the topic is that long winded or complicated ask when would be a good time to give them a call on the old fashioned telephone to discuss the topic further. With IM there are limitations you need to be aware of for long winded discussions. IM generally only allows 512 characters (79 words) per message.

3. Use IM for casual topics or informational briefs. Serious topics are not for IM. Can you believe I received a condolence IM when my father passed away? Not appropriate! Certain topics and situations require face-to-face meetings or at the very least a good old fashioned telephone call or card stating your feelings. IM is not the place for serious topics or confrontational issues.

4. As I mention in previous courtesies, IMing is not an excuse to forget your grade school education. Check your spelling and grammar. This is a communications tool. How can you communicate with clarity if you don't come off as one with a basic education?

5. If you are not a smooth multi-tasker, do not continue multiple IM sessions and leave folks hanging while you communicate with others. If you cannot give someone your full attention schedule another time to hook up and IM. Leaving others hanging while you chat with others is wasting the other person's time and gives them the impression you do not feel their time is valuable.

6. Learn how to use the features of your IM program. Specifically your "busy" and "away" message features. This will allow those trying to communicate with you to know your status and avoid mis-communications about your availability. For those that don't take your "busy" and "away" messages seriously, use the "ignore" feature. The ignore button is a built-in feature that allows users to block communications from anyone you choose. You can allow only certain people to contact you, or block certain users from contacting you at all. Use this feature sparingly for those who do not respect your time or your requests for contact at a later time.

7. Never IM under an alias to take a peek at friends' or associates' activities. Now that is rude!

8. Take into consideration who you are communicating with to determine the acronyms and emoticons that should be used - if at all. Certainly you wouldn't use the same with a business associate vs. a friend. You also wouldn't use certain acronyms with your Mom who may not even know what the acronyms mean. Use your better judgment here!

9. Word of Caution: As with e-mail, IMs can be saved and sent to others. Once you send it - it is gone. If you are upset, sign off until you cool off! Don't type what you would not want to be passed around. I get e-mails from IMers all the time who are upset because they sent a private note to a friend they thought they could trust who then broadcasted their IM across the net. Know who you can trust!

10. A Word to Business Folks: Be professional even though IM is meant to be casual, keep in mind the quality of your messages will reflect on your perceived professionalism. A spelling and grammar check is imperative in any form of business communications regardless of mode used. As mentioned above, I've found that most people are unable to multiple task effectively. Keep this in mind if you are having multiple IM exchanges at a single time. It is better to limit yourself and communicate the right message than to confuse messages or tone between IMers. As a courtesy, more so for business communications, if you are unable to respond because of a deadline or a meeting, set yourself to "busy", so your colleagues will know that you are unable to respond and are not just ignoring them.

MandyBlake · 09-05-2005, 07:31 PM

thanks for those points jace!

baddog · 09-05-2005, 07:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JaceXXX

With IM there are limitations you need to be aware of for long winded discussions. IM generally only allows 512 characters (79 words) per message.

What IM service are you using?

demented · 09-05-2005, 07:34 PM

Very well put.. #6 is very important. When you're away, use the away feature

seeric · 09-05-2005, 07:37 PM

OMG! you have hit the nail on the head. especially about the 24 hour a day thing. i get IMs in the morning when i wake up from people infuiriated and convinced that i was ignoring them all night while i slept. even with the IM status on ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
how dare i sleep. lol.

09-05-2005, 07:25 PM	#1
Jace FBOP Class Of 2013 Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: bumfuck, ky Posts: 35,562	Use Instant Messaging (IM) properly with consideration for the other person Many of the issues that apply to e-mail apply to Instant Messaging and visa-versa. The key is courtesy and clarity in your communications. 1. Start by always asking if the person you are IMing is available and if it is a good time to chat. I get e-mail all the time from folks who get frustrated by others who think they should be available 24/7 or whenever they choose to be online. If the person you want to IM with is busy, ask them when they will be free. You do the same - if you are busy and cannot chat, let the other person know and advise them when you can connect at a later time so that they can have your full attention. 2. Practice communicating briefly and succinctly. Clarity is a skill that needs to be worked on when it comes to the short messages generally used with IM. IM is meant for brief communications - not your manifesto on the days events. If the topic is that long winded or complicated ask when would be a good time to give them a call on the old fashioned telephone to discuss the topic further. With IM there are limitations you need to be aware of for long winded discussions. IM generally only allows 512 characters (79 words) per message. 3. Use IM for casual topics or informational briefs. Serious topics are not for IM. Can you believe I received a condolence IM when my father passed away? Not appropriate! Certain topics and situations require face-to-face meetings or at the very least a good old fashioned telephone call or card stating your feelings. IM is not the place for serious topics or confrontational issues. 4. As I mention in previous courtesies, IMing is not an excuse to forget your grade school education. Check your spelling and grammar. This is a communications tool. How can you communicate with clarity if you don't come off as one with a basic education? 5. If you are not a smooth multi-tasker, do not continue multiple IM sessions and leave folks hanging while you communicate with others. If you cannot give someone your full attention schedule another time to hook up and IM. Leaving others hanging while you chat with others is wasting the other person's time and gives them the impression you do not feel their time is valuable. 6. Learn how to use the features of your IM program. Specifically your "busy" and "away" message features. This will allow those trying to communicate with you to know your status and avoid mis-communications about your availability. For those that don't take your "busy" and "away" messages seriously, use the "ignore" feature. The ignore button is a built-in feature that allows users to block communications from anyone you choose. You can allow only certain people to contact you, or block certain users from contacting you at all. Use this feature sparingly for those who do not respect your time or your requests for contact at a later time. 7. Never IM under an alias to take a peek at friends' or associates' activities. Now that is rude! 8. Take into consideration who you are communicating with to determine the acronyms and emoticons that should be used - if at all. Certainly you wouldn't use the same with a business associate vs. a friend. You also wouldn't use certain acronyms with your Mom who may not even know what the acronyms mean. Use your better judgment here! 9. Word of Caution: As with e-mail, IMs can be saved and sent to others. Once you send it - it is gone. If you are upset, sign off until you cool off! Don't type what you would not want to be passed around. I get e-mails from IMers all the time who are upset because they sent a private note to a friend they thought they could trust who then broadcasted their IM across the net. Know who you can trust! 10. A Word to Business Folks: Be professional even though IM is meant to be casual, keep in mind the quality of your messages will reflect on your perceived professionalism. A spelling and grammar check is imperative in any form of business communications regardless of mode used. As mentioned above, I've found that most people are unable to multiple task effectively. Keep this in mind if you are having multiple IM exchanges at a single time. It is better to limit yourself and communicate the right message than to confuse messages or tone between IMers. As a courtesy, more so for business communications, if you are unable to respond because of a deadline or a meeting, set yourself to "busy", so your colleagues will know that you are unable to respond and are not just ignoring them.

09-05-2005, 07:31 PM	#2
MandyBlake The one and only! Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 17,761	thanks for those points jace! __________________ Mandy's Playhouse Her First Fat Girl If you're interested in promoting my sites, ICQ me! 178411921

09-05-2005, 07:34 PM	#4
demented Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Cincinnati Ohio Posts: 2,388	Very well put.. #6 is very important. When you're away, use the away feature

09-05-2005, 07:37 PM	#5
seeric .......... Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: .......... Posts: 41,917	OMG! you have hit the nail on the head. especially about the 24 hour a day thing. i get IMs in the morning when i wake up from people infuiriated and convinced that i was ignoring them all night while i slept. even with the IM status on ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz how dare i sleep. lol.