if you cheat on your Thai girlfriend..... - GoFuckYourself.com

SABAI · 01-30-2002, 05:48 PM

"10 WAYS TO COVER YOUR ASS".

HOW TO AVOID BEING CAUGHT or suspected of being WITH ANOTHER WOMAN

So, if like me, you hate those short-time hotels and much prefer the comfort of your own room, make sure you clean up all the evidence after the "crime" has been committed. In order to avoid being caught by your nosey and inquisitive girlfriend or wife whom typically has a nose for anything "fishy", I would reccomend the following which I have devised as a checklist of things to do after the paid-sex has ended and Miss Bargirl has bow-leggedly squelched herself home and out of your room.

1. Change the bed sheets. (Yeah its obvious and it may be your mum's job, but how many of us actually do change the sheets after the event?).

2. Clean all cups (lipstick on the rim may be a pleasant sight, but when on the rim of a cup/glass it can be troublesome evidence)

3. Sweep/vacuum the floor (pubic hair on the tiles!!!! A Colombo-esque girlfriend will spot it from 100 meters....and she'll know its not hers)

4. Empty the ash-trays (lipsticked fags & butts belong in Patpong. Not in your ashtray.)

5. Empty the bin (an empty sack is better than a full one!! People say the eyes are the window to ones sole. But that's bollocks. The bin is the window to ones sole. Just imagine.........condom wrappers, ripped panties, KY jelly, a John Denver CD and peanut butter........its a dead give away! You romantic fool !!)

6. Do the Dusting (simply don your favourite maid uniform and get cleaning. One stray hair typically found by your NOW Mac-wearing, cigar smoking & Colombo mimicking girlfriend ..........and its all over.

7. Shower and Basin Plugholes (We've all fingered worse, so please, enthusiastically get into the task. Again, the key here is HAIR. !!!........Audible utterances of "ah......there's just one more thing" as your girlfriend/wife scratches her head are a true sign that you should stop fantasising about Colombo or....... she has found her golden pube of evidence.

8. Check the shirt you wore last night. (How many times have you cussed & snarled at the make-up covered collar of your prised 70's $4 shirt? This is irrefutable evidence. Can't blame it on lovely Mrs Colombo, coz on TV I reckon she does not exist anyway)

9. Wash/shower your philandering body of all that's musty and crusty (agreed, you should not have let her ride your face. Any hint of a pubic beard or smell of tuna will send your, BY NOW, unattractive, mind-warpingly-annoying, self-styled Colombo t-rak into a flying and raging blur of dirty brown Macs, sweaty loose wigs and verbal incoherence.

10. Ply the Receptionist/security guard/bellboy (money talks!! Its an old one, but its true. Pay a friendly member of staff to keep a lookout for you. Your lookout may be worth their weight in gold. Make sure your selected lookout is a man, preferably the security guard, because he is the first one to spot your old battle-axe as she thunders up the road with her castration equipment in-hand.)

taken from http://www.chopsticks.net/stickman/reader.html

kangaroo · 01-30-2002, 08:41 PM

What about Thai girlz ?

optikalz · 01-31-2002, 12:43 AM

Interesting Topic. I've always wondered... do Western men go to Thailand cuz the Poonani is cheaper or is it because Thai Women are qualitatively better companions than US paid tang?

Apparently, Eastern European pussy is cheaper than US tang but why isn't there such a cult following along the same dimensions as the Thai sex tour industry?

The Philippines had a similar rep to Thailand but after several tourist kidnappings by Islamic terrorists, a beheading here and there, the sex tour dollar kinda tailed off a bit.

Backov · 01-31-2002, 01:12 AM

There's some simple reasons men like Thai whores:

1 - Lots of them are underage. Some are WAY underage. So the pedo fucks like it.
2 - They're all petite, and Thai chicks are generally quite nice looking.
3 - Only 50% of them have HIV (According to the WHO) so hey, why not.

The way I figure it, the people that go to Thailand for hookers deserve what they get. The majority of those girls are sold into virtual slavery by their parents, knowingly or not.

Cheers,
Backov

spacedog · 01-31-2002, 01:17 AM

I thought it had someting to do with spinning baskets

SABAI · 01-31-2002, 04:57 AM

Bakov,
have you ever been out to thailand before stating facts ?

first you have way more paedophilia market lets say in russsia, cuba,ceylan,madagascar and even USA and Europe Than there is actually taking place in Thailand....At leat laws on underage people are being enforced way more over there than in any other country i've ever been (i admit that this is only true since 6 years or so)

as for Aids...ok its a fact that aids are widespread in SE Asia (as well as in the whole world) but Thailand is a country where most people and thus semimondaines are aware of it than in most other "civilised" western countries...
just an example...in Thailand you will have trouble finding a hooker who accepts to do it without condom (still there are some)
but think about in Europe and Usa of how many people now have sexual intercourse unprotected because they think that tritherapy is the ultimate answer to Aids?....
the number of people HIV positive and who don't know it In our countries are far more important than what the WHO wants us to know....When did you get your last blood check?
In Thailand there is a whooping 80% of the hookers that undergo bloodtest for HIV and VD on a weekly basis ....what about our countrys? also the use of heroin by injection is far less spread among Thai prostitutes than amongst western ones which is another factor....

I think that one should clean on his porch first before starting to flame the neighbour....in other terms don't flame Thailand with empty facts just because the tv only speaks about the bad sides of a country...lets face it...watch a documentary about USA and it will be about Yellowstone park...watch a documentary about Thailand and it will be about prostitution, fake goods,etc...
The media have devilised Thailand because its far more interesting money and audience wise to show the bad parts than to show the good ones....did you know that the best selling documentary about USA was "Forbidden America" (circa 70's) in wich you can see the perverted american ways....unfortunately (or luckily) i was never aired on tv before midnight so it has a confidential diffusion....but i would assure you that if there was another of this kind nowadays people would point out USA as they do for Thailand

hope this enlightens your knowledge of the world outside America

cheers

Mole · 01-31-2002, 06:08 AM

Backov, you don't know a shit about what's facts.

SABAI has already covered the other points and I'll handle the so called "slavery" bullshit.

I'd say that there's a very very tiny amount of the girls who are actually forced into this business.

99% of them are doing it voluntarily and because they earn relatively good.

Perhaps you should get your ass down here and I'll show you around how it really is.

01-30-2002, 05:48 PM	#1
SABAI Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: footmaniac.com Posts: 2,880	if you cheat on your Thai girlfriend..... "10 WAYS TO COVER YOUR ASS". HOW TO AVOID BEING CAUGHT or suspected of being WITH ANOTHER WOMAN So, if like me, you hate those short-time hotels and much prefer the comfort of your own room, make sure you clean up all the evidence after the "crime" has been committed. In order to avoid being caught by your nosey and inquisitive girlfriend or wife whom typically has a nose for anything "fishy", I would reccomend the following which I have devised as a checklist of things to do after the paid-sex has ended and Miss Bargirl has bow-leggedly squelched herself home and out of your room. 1. Change the bed sheets. (Yeah its obvious and it may be your mum's job, but how many of us actually do change the sheets after the event?). 2. Clean all cups (lipstick on the rim may be a pleasant sight, but when on the rim of a cup/glass it can be troublesome evidence) 3. Sweep/vacuum the floor (pubic hair on the tiles!!!! A Colombo-esque girlfriend will spot it from 100 meters....and she'll know its not hers) 4. Empty the ash-trays (lipsticked fags & butts belong in Patpong. Not in your ashtray.) 5. Empty the bin (an empty sack is better than a full one!! People say the eyes are the window to ones sole. But that's bollocks. The bin is the window to ones sole. Just imagine.........condom wrappers, ripped panties, KY jelly, a John Denver CD and peanut butter........its a dead give away! You romantic fool !!) 6. Do the Dusting (simply don your favourite maid uniform and get cleaning. One stray hair typically found by your NOW Mac-wearing, cigar smoking & Colombo mimicking girlfriend ..........and its all over. 7. Shower and Basin Plugholes (We've all fingered worse, so please, enthusiastically get into the task. Again, the key here is HAIR. !!!........Audible utterances of "ah......there's just one more thing" as your girlfriend/wife scratches her head are a true sign that you should stop fantasising about Colombo or....... she has found her golden pube of evidence. 8. Check the shirt you wore last night. (How many times have you cussed & snarled at the make-up covered collar of your prised 70's $4 shirt? This is irrefutable evidence. Can't blame it on lovely Mrs Colombo, coz on TV I reckon she does not exist anyway) 9. Wash/shower your philandering body of all that's musty and crusty (agreed, you should not have let her ride your face. Any hint of a pubic beard or smell of tuna will send your, BY NOW, unattractive, mind-warpingly-annoying, self-styled Colombo t-rak into a flying and raging blur of dirty brown Macs, sweaty loose wigs and verbal incoherence. 10. Ply the Receptionist/security guard/bellboy (money talks!! Its an old one, but its true. Pay a friendly member of staff to keep a lookout for you. Your lookout may be worth their weight in gold. Make sure your selected lookout is a man, preferably the security guard, because he is the first one to spot your old battle-axe as she thunders up the road with her castration equipment in-hand.) taken from http://www.chopsticks.net/stickman/reader.html __________________

01-31-2002, 01:12 AM	#4
Backov Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Cat Detector Van Posts: 1,600	There's some simple reasons men like Thai whores: 1 - Lots of them are underage. Some are WAY underage. So the pedo fucks like it. 2 - They're all petite, and Thai chicks are generally quite nice looking. 3 - Only 50% of them have HIV (According to the WHO) so hey, why not. The way I figure it, the people that go to Thailand for hookers deserve what they get. The majority of those girls are sold into virtual slavery by their parents, knowingly or not. Cheers, Backov __________________ <embed src="http://banners.spotbrokers.com/button.swf" FlashVars="clickURL=http://banners.spotbrokers.com" quality=high pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="120" height="60"></embed>

01-31-2002, 04:57 AM	#6
SABAI Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: footmaniac.com Posts: 2,880	Bakov, have you ever been out to thailand before stating facts ? first you have way more paedophilia market lets say in russsia, cuba,ceylan,madagascar and even USA and Europe Than there is actually taking place in Thailand....At leat laws on underage people are being enforced way more over there than in any other country i've ever been (i admit that this is only true since 6 years or so) as for Aids...ok its a fact that aids are widespread in SE Asia (as well as in the whole world) but Thailand is a country where most people and thus semimondaines are aware of it than in most other "civilised" western countries... just an example...in Thailand you will have trouble finding a hooker who accepts to do it without condom (still there are some) but think about in Europe and Usa of how many people now have sexual intercourse unprotected because they think that tritherapy is the ultimate answer to Aids?.... the number of people HIV positive and who don't know it In our countries are far more important than what the WHO wants us to know....When did you get your last blood check? In Thailand there is a whooping 80% of the hookers that undergo bloodtest for HIV and VD on a weekly basis ....what about our countrys? also the use of heroin by injection is far less spread among Thai prostitutes than amongst western ones which is another factor.... I think that one should clean on his porch first before starting to flame the neighbour....in other terms don't flame Thailand with empty facts just because the tv only speaks about the bad sides of a country...lets face it...watch a documentary about USA and it will be about Yellowstone park...watch a documentary about Thailand and it will be about prostitution, fake goods,etc... The media have devilised Thailand because its far more interesting money and audience wise to show the bad parts than to show the good ones....did you know that the best selling documentary about USA was "Forbidden America" (circa 70's) in wich you can see the perverted american ways....unfortunately (or luckily) i was never aired on tv before midnight so it has a confidential diffusion....but i would assure you that if there was another of this kind nowadays people would point out USA as they do for Thailand hope this enlightens your knowledge of the world outside America cheers __________________

01-30-2002, 08:41 PM	#2
kangaroo Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Sydney Posts: 112	What about Thai girlz ?

01-31-2002, 12:43 AM	#3
optikalz Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Lost Angelez Posts: 555	Interesting Topic. I've always wondered... do Western men go to Thailand cuz the Poonani is cheaper or is it because Thai Women are qualitatively better companions than US paid tang? Apparently, Eastern European pussy is cheaper than US tang but why isn't there such a cult following along the same dimensions as the Thai sex tour industry? The Philippines had a similar rep to Thailand but after several tourist kidnappings by Islamic terrorists, a beheading here and there, the sex tour dollar kinda tailed off a bit.

01-31-2002, 01:17 AM	#5
spacedog Yes that IS me. Bitch. Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Posts: 14,149	I thought it had someting to do with spinning baskets

01-31-2002, 06:08 AM	#7
Mole Registered User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Thailand Posts: 26	Backov, you don't know a shit about what's facts. SABAI has already covered the other points and I'll handle the so called "slavery" bullshit. I'd say that there's a very very tiny amount of the girls who are actually forced into this business. 99% of them are doing it voluntarily and because they earn relatively good. Perhaps you should get your ass down here and I'll show you around how it really is.