Need advice with future in-laws - GoFuckYourself.com

Enema · 04-29-2005, 11:37 AM

Allo,

My fiance and her brother have never gotten along well, it's one of those asian families where the son is revered by the parents and never punished for anything he does. As a result of this, he's never had any discipline and is a 23 year old slob living at home, pregnant girlfriend and can't keep a job. Insanely jealous of my fiance who has degrees up the wazoo, real estate and is a scientist at 24.

At our engagement party, everyone was drunk and he said some things to her that he shouldn't have, namely that he didn't want her to have anything to do with his coming child as she is irresponsible. She was of course, very upset. I didn't want to cause a scene so I asked their cousin to remove him from the party. He would not leave, created a big scene with the cousin and had to be restrained. I went to him myself and told him I wanted him out of the house, that he needed to stop acting like a child and take responsibility for himself, he swung at me - I blocked and cracked him straight in the teeth, knocking him to the ground... I was very angry that he would disrespect me like that in my own house. He got back up and was quickly restrained by his cousin.

After some heated words, he left, however he's the type to hold a grudge. His kid has now been born and after hearing that my fiance visited the child he told her at a family gathering, "Don't fucking go near my kid again".
Whenever she calls the house to speak with her parents, he will leave the phone off the hook instead of getting them, or hang up - he's a general asshole.

Of course, her parents are oblivious and wouldn't do anything anyway... what do you guys think I should do to try and "fix" a quarter of a century of bad blood and now, new bad blood ?

HarrytheNazi · 04-29-2005, 11:52 AM

Divorce his sister....

SleazyDream · 04-29-2005, 11:53 AM

kill them and hide the bodies

keep the life insurance payments up - 7 years till payday

Raven · 04-29-2005, 11:55 AM

Best thing you can do is move far, far away. A quarter century of dysfunction is not fixable.....your fiance can only change her own way of dealing with it....but, they will not change....and it's not worth the stress on your new beginning.....marriage is tough enough.....

Mr Dickovitch · 04-29-2005, 11:58 AM

You put doodoo in a bag and put it on their porch and light it on fire then ring their doorbell and run away. He will go outside to stomp out the fire and shit will explode all over his porch and shoe!

This is the solution for 99% of all family problems.

LiveDose · 04-29-2005, 12:04 PM

From personal experience, your problems are only just starting. If her family is that ignorant then the best thing is to keep a distance (at least for a while) My wife and I have gone through unbelieveable situations with both of our families. The only way we were able to bring some kind of stability was to pull away.

Your fiance sounds like the typical asian female martyr. (I know, my wife is korean). They are a little slow at being able to stand up to parents, grandparents, sibblings etc.) You will have to work on her and basically knock some sense into her. The last thing her parents will probably want is to lose contact with her. Tell her to pull back and stop trying so hard. If she keeps reaching out to them then these problems will never end. Trust me.

Good luck man. If you love eachother then support one another and stick it out.

Her brother sounds like a piece of shit. He'll get what's coming to him, just give it time and stay away from him.

04-29-2005, 11:37 AM	#1
Enema Confirmed User Join Date: May 2004 Location: Australia Posts: 599	Need advice with future in-laws Allo, My fiance and her brother have never gotten along well, it's one of those asian families where the son is revered by the parents and never punished for anything he does. As a result of this, he's never had any discipline and is a 23 year old slob living at home, pregnant girlfriend and can't keep a job. Insanely jealous of my fiance who has degrees up the wazoo, real estate and is a scientist at 24. At our engagement party, everyone was drunk and he said some things to her that he shouldn't have, namely that he didn't want her to have anything to do with his coming child as she is irresponsible. She was of course, very upset. I didn't want to cause a scene so I asked their cousin to remove him from the party. He would not leave, created a big scene with the cousin and had to be restrained. I went to him myself and told him I wanted him out of the house, that he needed to stop acting like a child and take responsibility for himself, he swung at me - I blocked and cracked him straight in the teeth, knocking him to the ground... I was very angry that he would disrespect me like that in my own house. He got back up and was quickly restrained by his cousin. After some heated words, he left, however he's the type to hold a grudge. His kid has now been born and after hearing that my fiance visited the child he told her at a family gathering, "Don't fucking go near my kid again". Whenever she calls the house to speak with her parents, he will leave the phone off the hook instead of getting them, or hang up - he's a general asshole. Of course, her parents are oblivious and wouldn't do anything anyway... what do you guys think I should do to try and "fix" a quarter of a century of bad blood and now, new bad blood ? __________________ Last edited by Enema; 04-29-2005 at 11:38 AM..

04-29-2005, 11:53 AM	#3
SleazyDream I'm here for SPORT Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phone # (401) 285-0696 Posts: 41,470	kill them and hide the bodies keep the life insurance payments up - 7 years till payday __________________ This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! Now read without the word dog.

04-29-2005, 11:55 AM	#4
Raven Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 6,874	Best thing you can do is move far, far away. A quarter century of dysfunction is not fixable.....your fiance can only change her own way of dealing with it....but, they will not change....and it's not worth the stress on your new beginning.....marriage is tough enough..... __________________ Raven ~RETIRED~

04-29-2005, 11:52 AM	#2
HarrytheNazi Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 1,164	Divorce his sister....

04-29-2005, 11:58 AM	#5
Mr Dickovitch Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 1,070	You put doodoo in a bag and put it on their porch and light it on fire then ring their doorbell and run away. He will go outside to stomp out the fire and shit will explode all over his porch and shoe! This is the solution for 99% of all family problems.

04-29-2005, 12:04 PM	#6
LiveDose Show Yer Tits! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Somewhere Out there... Posts: 25,792	From personal experience, your problems are only just starting. If her family is that ignorant then the best thing is to keep a distance (at least for a while) My wife and I have gone through unbelieveable situations with both of our families. The only way we were able to bring some kind of stability was to pull away. Your fiance sounds like the typical asian female martyr. (I know, my wife is korean). They are a little slow at being able to stand up to parents, grandparents, sibblings etc.) You will have to work on her and basically knock some sense into her. The last thing her parents will probably want is to lose contact with her. Tell her to pull back and stop trying so hard. If she keeps reaching out to them then these problems will never end. Trust me. Good luck man. If you love eachother then support one another and stick it out. Her brother sounds like a piece of shit. He'll get what's coming to him, just give it time and stay away from him.