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Old 01-28-2005, 04:16 PM   #1
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Was I right or wrong??? (male-female stuff)

Today I had an ex girlfriend over for dinner.
We enjoyed dinner and a nice conversation. Nothing more cause I have a new girlfriend and I love my girlfriend very much.
We were talking about valentinesday and I asked her if she expected any cards or flowers or stuff. She answered by saying just from you...
Ok..she rubbed me the wrong way here...I told her she can not be so sure about it and I did not know if I would send her anything.
She did not believe me.
Then the conversation continued and she started telling me how sorry she was she dumped me like that in the past and she did not mean to hurt me.
She dumped me??? When was this???
Then she said that she knew if she would kiss me I would go for her again and she would probably hurt me again.
By this time I had enough of it...I dont know why I did it but I told her she was wrong...Not only would I not fall for her again but I also told her I never fell in love with her in the first place.
She was shocked....
I carried on saying she was a real good person and a real good looking one as well but it had just been sex for me...
Her arrogance faded away and made room for anger...
Three minutes later she went home.

I dont know why I said such a thing. I dont even remember if I was in love with her back then or not. I just could not stand her arrogance...
Did I just behave as an asshole or did I put her on her place?
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:18 PM   #2
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what the fuck were you doing having an ex over for dinner? are you nuts?
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:20 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by escorpio
what the fuck were you doing having an ex over for dinner? are you nuts?
She was in town. Dinner as friends...Well that is how I intended it anyways.
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:21 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by escorpio
what the fuck were you doing having an ex over for dinner? are you nuts?
She also was trying to lay on the pussy charm, he put himself in a very bad and very silly place to be. On the semi good side, looks like he got himself out of it (unless she left something of course).
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:22 PM   #5
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That "friends" shit never works. Stay away from ex-girlfriends. Especially if you have a current one.
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:24 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by escorpio
what the fuck were you doing having an ex over for dinner? are you nuts?
I've gotta agree with escorpio here. I mean, if it was "just sex," as you told her, then why even bother with "dinner as friends?"
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:25 PM   #7
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A quick summary of what happened: she wanted you back, you could have gotten laid, you screwed up.
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:27 PM   #8
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She also was trying to lay on the pussy charm, he put himself in a very bad and very silly place to be. On the semi good side, looks like he got himself out of it (unless she left something of course).
That's true, he extracted himself from a sticky situation like a champ.
Now stay outta those situations!
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:28 PM   #9
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A quick summary of what happened: she wanted you back, you could have gotten laid, you screwed up.
No, he did the right thing. You can tell by her play she's a manipulative beast.
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:32 PM   #10
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Wow PP she misunderstood the valentine day thingie... I thought you were more familiar with the pshyche.. oh boy
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:40 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by escorpio
That "friends" shit never works. Stay away from ex-girlfriends. Especially if you have a current one.
I am starting to think you are right...
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:40 PM   #12
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That "friends" shit never works. Stay away from ex-girlfriends. Especially if you have a current one.

Unless you wanna get laid
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:41 PM   #13
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There is a reason why she is your EX.......
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:42 PM   #14
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Wow PP she misunderstood the valentine day thingie... I thought you were more familiar with the pshyche.. oh boy
You think she misunderstood? Same for the dinner? Did I give signals that I was not aware of? Like women always tend to do?
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:55 PM   #15
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You think she misunderstood? Same for the dinner? Did I give signals that I was not aware of? Like women always tend to do?
Yes I think so... the dinner wasn't a mistake but your chat was sort of dangerous... add the signals, some body talk and you are done
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Old 01-28-2005, 05:08 PM   #16
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Ok, here's a little female input on the situation. As a woman, I have several ex's that I still talk to either online, on the phone, etc. Once in a while, we'll hang out. Now, there are different levels of relationships...

1. an ex that you were in love with, dated a while, but ended the relationship on mutual grounds & were able to walk away with respect for each other, and no hard feelings.

2. an ex that you cared about but they shit on you and you ended things BADLY

3. an ex that really wasn't like a REAL bf, no love, more of a sexual thing, FwB (friend with benefits)

I don't really hang out with the #2's but for some reason, after a yr or so, they will call and want to shoot the shit, I don't mind saying hi, but I wouldn't invite them over for dinner, unless I was seasoning it with arsenic. The #1's I don't really hang out with either, we can shoot a hi or so back & forth online or say hello & introduce each other to new partners if we bump into the bar, but still, no dinners & hanging out. So that leaves the # 3's! These are the guys who call & chat all the time. There was no dramatic break ups, so no hard feelings.

The problem here is that they don't understand boundaries when you meet someone new that you care about and want to be exclusive with. Perfect example, the other night a guy that I was FwB with over the summer was in town. He had shot me a few msg online and told me his car was broke down and he was stuck in town. I said, well I'm on the way up to spend some time with my man, but I can drop you off on the way. He said, cool. Ok, so I assumed things were clear, I had said I was going to see someone, its obvious that I'm interested in someone else, right? No. The whole way in the car, he's trying to feel me up. I asked him to stop several times, he kept saying "why" and 'well you guys arent officially dating, he's not your bf" and I had to keep spelling it out. Sometimes people's ego's get the best of them, they can't imagine that you could care about someone else so much that you wouldnt still want to be with them, if you had the chance.

You have to be careful about putting yourself in those situations, as a woman more so, but apparently even you guys have wacky girls too. And from a woman, you should watch out, cause woman can be vandictive hahahahas! Trust me on this, a girl I know went and fucked her ex, took a pic of him fucking her with her cell phone, and when she got home, she emailed the pics to his new gf! lol Why she thought that would make him want her back, I dont know!

Good Luck
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Old 01-28-2005, 05:19 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thefool
Ok, here's a little female input on the situation. As a woman, I have several ex's that I still talk to either online, on the phone, etc. Once in a while, we'll hang out. Now, there are different levels of relationships...

1. an ex that you were in love with, dated a while, but ended the relationship on mutual grounds & were able to walk away with respect for each other, and no hard feelings.

2. an ex that you cared about but they shit on you and you ended things BADLY

3. an ex that really wasn't like a REAL bf, no love, more of a sexual thing, FwB (friend with benefits)

I don't really hang out with the #2's but for some reason, after a yr or so, they will call and want to shoot the shit, I don't mind saying hi, but I wouldn't invite them over for dinner, unless I was seasoning it with arsenic. The #1's I don't really hang out with either, we can shoot a hi or so back & forth online or say hello & introduce each other to new partners if we bump into the bar, but still, no dinners & hanging out. So that leaves the # 3's! These are the guys who call & chat all the time. There was no dramatic break ups, so no hard feelings.

The problem here is that they don't understand boundaries when you meet someone new that you care about and want to be exclusive with. Perfect example, the other night a guy that I was FwB with over the summer was in town. He had shot me a few msg online and told me his car was broke down and he was stuck in town. I said, well I'm on the way up to spend some time with my man, but I can drop you off on the way. He said, cool. Ok, so I assumed things were clear, I had said I was going to see someone, its obvious that I'm interested in someone else, right? No. The whole way in the car, he's trying to feel me up. I asked him to stop several times, he kept saying "why" and 'well you guys arent officially dating, he's not your bf" and I had to keep spelling it out. Sometimes people's ego's get the best of them, they can't imagine that you could care about someone else so much that you wouldnt still want to be with them, if you had the chance.

You have to be careful about putting yourself in those situations, as a woman more so, but apparently even you guys have wacky girls too. And from a woman, you should watch out, cause woman can be vandictive hahahahas! Trust me on this, a girl I know went and fucked her ex, took a pic of him fucking her with her cell phone, and when she got home, she emailed the pics to his new gf! lol Why she thought that would make him want her back, I dont know!

Good Luck
Thank you for the extensive answer.
Most probably she was a 1. She acted like a 2 so I told her she was a 3...
I think it was her arrogance that made me do it. I admit I probably acted like an asshole hurting her ego by saying she was a 3. Yeah I should have probably made things more clear from the start like Digifan said as well.
I should not have placed myself in that situation.
Lesson learned....
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Old 01-28-2005, 05:50 PM   #18
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That "friends" shit never works. Stay away from ex-girlfriends. Especially if you have a current one.
That is if you love the current one.
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Old 01-28-2005, 05:56 PM   #19
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you're an idiot. you could have talked her and your gf in to a threesome.
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Old 01-28-2005, 06:03 PM   #20
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A quick summary of what happened: she wanted you back, you could have gotten laid, you screwed up.
That's the way I look at it, never burn bridges..
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Old 01-28-2005, 06:28 PM   #21
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FwB, friend with benefits now that's way cool
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Old 01-28-2005, 06:32 PM   #22
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FwB, friend with benefits now that's way cool
If I did not have such a sweet and great girlfriend I would love to have had you as a FwB....
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Old 01-28-2005, 07:10 PM   #23
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