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51
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Hey I said no fucking postbot
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46
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Ok this thread is ruined now
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:sleep
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Oh ok ... my bad then :) post away
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I just don't want no stupid postbots :0 lol
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ok, 10 more from me.....
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or more....
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because
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I
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go
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to
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see
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free
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porn
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1
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Come On, Ride The Train
If an electric train is heading north, which way would the steam be coming out? It isn't. It's an electric train. |
Best Excuse For Speeding
A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an interstate road for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him. ''They'll never catch me,'' he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100 110 and finally 120 with the lights still behind him. ''What in hell am I doing?'' he thought and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. ''I've had a tough shift and this is my last pull over. I don't feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before you can go!'' he said. ''Last week my wife ran off with a cop,'' the man said, ''and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!'' ''Have a nice night,'' said the officer. |
Man Finds Hat, Religion
A man loses his hat, so he goes to church to steal one off of the hat rack. When he gets there, the priest was giving his sermon on the Ten Commandments. Something in the sermon gives the man a flash of insight and, after mass, the man goes to confession to tell the priest what he was going to do... Man: Forgive me father, for I have sinned. Father: Go ahead, son. Man: I lost my hat and I came to church today to steal a hat off of the rack. Father: Is that so? Man: But then I heard you talking about the Ten Commandments - and I changed my mind. Father: Really? My son, did you make this decision when I was discussing the commandment: "Thou shalt not steal?" Man: No. It was when you started talking about, "Thou shalt not commit adultery" that I remembered where my hat was! |
Young Couple
A young couple got married, and in their family, it was tradition that the best man dance with the bride for the first song. Well, this happened...but then they danced for the second song too. And the third. By the time the fourth song came on, the groom ran up and kicked the bride between the legs. A riot broke out, and all the invited guests were hauled off to jail. In court the next week, the judge asked the best man what happened. ''Your honor, we were just dancing, and the groom ran up and kicked the bride between the legs.'' ''That must have hurt,'' said the judge. ''No kidding,'' said the best man. ''I broke three of my fingers.'' |
Not All Blondes Are Dumb
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at the craps tables for players when a gorgeous blonde lady walked in and asked if they minded if she bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, ''I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely naked.'' With that, she stripped off all her clothes and then rolled the dice while yelling ''Come on baby, momma needs new clothes!'' She then jumped up and down, hugging each of the casino dealers while yelling ''YES, I WIN! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, I WIN!!'' With that, she picked up her winnings and clothes and quickly left. The dealers stood there staring at each other dumbfounded, until one finally asked the other, ''What the hell did she roll anyway?'' The second dealer answered, ''I thought you were paying attention!'' |
I'm aloooooooooooooone
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God is Brazilian
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:banana
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:warning
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3000 is near :Graucho
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22 left
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Nearly up to $120!
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Almost 3000
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I didn't realise we were THAT near.
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Good job! Great idea.Good luck.
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i want the 3000th post plz!
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i think im going to get it! :Graucho
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and the winner of the 3000th post...
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me........ i think anyways... let me check!
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gotta love these threds.
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3K?
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