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Old 11-06-2004, 12:55 AM   #1
quiet
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love between people you are not related to...

does it really exist? if so, how do you define it?

cheers....
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Old 11-06-2004, 12:57 AM   #2
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I gather that weekend in Whistler is going rather well
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:01 AM   #3
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Are you being cynical?

Love is staying with your wife when you could be richer, freer, getting laid more and generally having more fun on your own...

And vice-versa.

(I'm assuming you're not related to your wife ;))
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:02 AM   #4
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love between non relatives never seems to be the same with any two different people....

it's always different
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:03 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dagwolf
Are you being cynical?

Love is staying with your wife when you could be richer, freer, getting laid more and generally having more fun on your own...

And vice-versa.

(I'm assuming you're not related to your wife ;))
stats say married people have more sex than single ones.

a lot more
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:05 AM   #6
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okay, i'll digress a little further. my dad, and my brother, i love to the point i would easily take a bullet for them.

i'm sure many will says they'd do the same for their spouse/sig other, but over 50% of these people end up broken up/divorced.

just trying to start an interesting thread
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:11 AM   #7
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Can't say I've ever really been in love so I wouldn't know
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:17 AM   #8
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What I can never understand is how someone can be so 'in love' with another person and suddenly shut it off, like a faucet, because of one thing or another.

I've seen it time and time again, but I cannot understand it. To me, an emotion is not attached to an on/off switch.
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:19 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by PersianKitty
What I can never understand is how someone can be so 'in love' with another person and suddenly shut it off, like a faucet, because of one thing or another.

I've seen it time and time again, but I cannot understand it. To me, an emotion is not attached to an on/off switch.
i agree. when you have that feeling for a person it's always there. circumstances can tell you the relationship isn't right - but that feeling is always there.....
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:20 AM   #10
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Originally posted by PersianKitty
What I can never understand is how someone can be so 'in love' with another person and suddenly shut it off, like a faucet, because of one thing or another.

I've seen it time and time again, but I cannot understand it. To me, an emotion is not attached to an on/off switch.
yes, and this is the crux of the question.
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Old 11-06-2004, 01:20 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by quiet
okay, i'll digress a little further. my dad, and my brother, i love to the point i would easily take a bullet for them.

i'm sure many will says they'd do the same for their spouse/sig other, but over 50% of these people end up broken up/divorced.

just trying to start an interesting thread
have you always been on the best of terms with you dad and brother?

relationships get stronger and weeker - love stays
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Old 11-07-2004, 02:59 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by quiet
does it really exist? if so, how do you define it?

cheers....
sometimes love can never be define by words.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:04 PM   #13
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I'd take a bullet for my son and my dog and that's it.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:12 PM   #14
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i agree. when you have that feeling for a person it's always there. circumstances can tell you the relationship isn't right - but that feeling is always there.....
Exactly.. LOVE is not the end all and be all of everything.. It's wonderful, but in some relationships there comes a point in time when the wonder of love isn't worth the pain and suffereing the other party may inflict/experience.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:14 PM   #15
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I'd take a bullet for my son and my dog and that's it.
Same here, I would die for my children, but I'd also die for my husband. He's my lifemate in every possible way. I wouldn't be whole without him.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:14 PM   #16
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Love is an illusion that only causes weakness, and is best avoided
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:17 PM   #17
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I am very much in love with my wife and know that I can trust her with anything...
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:20 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally posted by quiet
does it really exist? if so, how do you define it?

cheers....
When you put their needs ahead of your own.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:20 PM   #19
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i love my family because i have had 29 years of good times and hard times with them.

now ask me the this question after i spend 29 years with a woman and i will be able to give the same answer. that is if i can find a woman to spend 29 years with
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:24 PM   #20
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I cannot stand most of my BLOOD relatives, so it's hard for me to say.

I love my kids, husband, parents, and I like my friends and in laws a whole bunch. That's about it.
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Old 11-07-2004, 03:28 PM   #21
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If you would do _anything_ for the person. OR you when u get they shitty feeling inside if they're not aroud.
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Old 11-07-2004, 04:48 PM   #22
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All emotions are just millions of years of natural selection at work.
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Old 11-07-2004, 06:10 PM   #23
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Quiet. You say you'd take a bullet for your brother or Father. I'd do the same. Anyone of my close family members, mum, gran, etc.

Also tho, I have a collect group of friends I would do ANYTHING for. I'd take a bullet for them in a minute. My best friend and his girlfriend, they are part of my life. My best friend I've known for 16 years out of my 21 years on this planet.

My girlfriend, I'd do anything in this world for her also. I love her so dearly. Love in my opinion is something you always work at, it grows stronger day by day. I've not ever fell out of love with anything yet in my life. I guess one day I will. I don't look forward to it but it'll happen.
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Old 11-07-2004, 06:28 PM   #24
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Intersting question, quiet.

My closest blood relatives...there's a lot of love there in the "need-an-organ-here-you-go" sense, but not always a lot of "like". Just very different people. For me it's a love that's based in shared genetics and having more history with them then anyone else.

Somehow though I've managed to build a little "operational" family -- people I have no relation to, but who are as much family to me as my biological one. There's most definitely love that's manifested between us.

The love you feel for someone you fall in love with...well, that's the stuff that poets and writers have been trying to capture into words forever. Not even going to try here
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Old 11-07-2004, 06:33 PM   #25
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stats say married people have more sex than single ones.

a lot more
that should be obvious, you have 24/7 access to someone who loves to fuck you (if the marriage is successful). im sure it goes down with age tho. he could of been referring to get laiding with other ppl perhaps?
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Old 11-07-2004, 11:57 PM   #26
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I'd take a bullet for my son and my dog and that's it.
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Old 11-08-2004, 01:36 AM   #27
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I think love is one of those things that if you overanalyze it or hold your expectations too high, it won't exist for long. Like they say, there's a fine line between love and hate.

I know it exists but like it's been said in the above posts, it's on a case by case basis. What a lot of people don't understand is, all relationships have their ups and downs and they will hit a stale patch on occasion. That's life and circumstances. Someone worth being in a relationship with will stick with you in the hard times, someone who probably isn't on the same level as you, will bail at the first sign of boredom or other issues.

To me, true love is unconditional. It's forgiving, it's accepting, it's understanding, it's patient, it's not superficial, it's not materialistic and it's trusting. When you love someone, you won't notice their flaws or stress over their imperfections (be it physical or mental), you will just love them as a whole and not in a selective order.

This all probably sounds unrealistic, but it only sounds unrealistic when you have to force yourself to do all of those things. When it happens naturally, you won't even notice you are giving/receiving all of those things, all the time.

I know love exists... and I also know what it's like to have your heart torn out. Grief is the worst kind of pain. Sometimes I think humans are the unluckiest species in the world when it comes to emotions and thinking in general.
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Old 11-08-2004, 01:46 AM   #28
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Originally posted by PersianKitty
What I can never understand is how someone can be so 'in love' with another person and suddenly shut it off, like a faucet, because of one thing or another.

I've seen it time and time again, but I cannot understand it. To me, an emotion is not attached to an on/off switch.
I've wondered about this for quite a while, I've come to the conclusion that because you love someone doesnt necessarily mean you have to be with them. The shutting off is simply a defense mechanism and doesnt mean deep inside they have stopped loving you.
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Old 11-08-2004, 02:13 AM   #29
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What I can never understand is how someone can be so 'in love' with another person and suddenly shut it off, like a faucet, because of one thing or another.

I've seen it time and time again, but I cannot understand it. To me, an emotion is not attached to an on/off switch.


yeah i met girls like that

i hate when people do it

that is not real love i guess
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Old 11-08-2004, 07:21 AM   #30
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Original post:
okay, i'll digress a little further. my dad, and my brother, i love to the point i would easily take a bullet for them.

i'm sure many will says they'd do the same for their spouse/sig other, but over 50% of these people end up broken up/divorced.
++++++++++++++++++++++

There's many differing kinds of love

There's family love.

Romantic love.

And yes, love for your fellow humans (called "goodwill")


You really can't confuse one for the other. Each has a differing purpose.
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Old 11-08-2004, 07:48 AM   #31
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Even true Love is not permanent.
In 100% of cases, sooner or later it fades away.

This is just how life is. Can't do anything about it
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Old 11-08-2004, 09:08 AM   #32
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Well said Furious Female.
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Old 11-08-2004, 10:39 AM   #33
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Well said Furious Female.
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