Screenplay for indie short film involving ibill - GoFuckYourself.com

eroswebmaster · 08-28-2001, 09:44 AM

Fade in from black:
Interior Adult Webmasters Bedroom/Office - Morning

Coke cans are strewn about the desk top and newbie adult webmaster Mighty Joe Hung is sitting at his desk phone in hand, dialing a number.

Phone Voice Over:
"Thank you for calling iBill internet billing company. To continue this call in english please press 1."

Joe pulls the receive from his ear, impatiently eyes the dial pad and presses 1.

Phone Voice Over:
"For a description of iBill internet billing company please press 1."

Joe laughs to himself.

Phone Voice Over:
"To cancel an account with iBill internet billing company please press 2."

Joe grows more impatient.

Phone Voice Over:
"To speak to one of our customer service representatives please press 3."

A smile crosses Joe's face as he presses number 3.

Phone Voice Over:
"Please wait while we transfer you to one of our customer service representatives."

Music begins to play softly over the phone.

Joe begins to rock his head to the melodic beat.

A pause in the music causes Joe to become alert.

Joe:
"Shit that was quick."

Music begins to play again.

A puzzled look crosses Joe's face.

Joe:
"Hmmm...I guess the cd skipped...maybe a glitch in their satellite download."

The music pauses and once again Joe's excitement increases. This lasts only a moment as the music starts once again.

Cut to: Interior iBill corporate headquarters.

Customer Service Representative #1567 and Customer Service Supervisor A. Hole stand hovering over a phone in the dank dark quarters of this evil empire.

A. Hole motions to CSR #1567

A. Hole:
"Check it again."

CSR #1567 quietly picks up the phone and listens in...his eyes widen and he quickly puts the receiver back down on it's base.

CSR #1567
"Fuck he's still there
what do we do?"

A. Hole begins to pace the floor.

A. Hole
"I don't know check again.
Why don't they just fucking
hangup?!"

Cut to: Interior Adult webmasters office/bedroom.

The music coming over the phone pauses briefly again.

Mighty Joe Hung waits to hear a voice.

The music begins to play again.

Camera pans back:

Roll music:

Fade to black:

Roll credits:

This has been
A
40 Websites And
A
Hooker Production

Written, Produced, And Directed
For the gofuckyourself bbs
By
Eroswebmaster, webmaster TeeGeePee.com

Gary · 08-28-2001, 09:46 AM

LOL, i could actually visualize it as i was reading.

CDSmith · 08-28-2001, 09:54 AM

Damn that was good. Annoying, yes, but that's what made it good.

I can't wait for the sequel

(where the snoopervisor A. Hole actually goes for the gusto and picks up the phone herself/himself, and says in a robotic voice "all available operators are currently busy, after the tone leave your name and number and your ibill account, and one of our operators will call you back"....... and then she/he presses #9 on the keypad for a few seconds causing a tone. Then she let's you say your information, then she says "Thank you, goodbye") What quick thinking!!! That'll keep that rat bastard webmaster away for a few days at least.
___________
CD

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* <a href="http://www.stiffycash.com/?referer=cdsmith" TARGET="_blank">Make $35 per $1.95 Trial!!</a> +Free content! Is that a stiffy or a wad of 50's?

deluxe · 08-28-2001, 11:30 AM

wow I almost couldn't handle the excitement...

eroswebmaster · 08-28-2001, 06:25 PM

Never got through today...guess I'm gonna have to just do the whole speaker phone thing again tomorrow.

eros

------------------
This has been another 40 websites and a hooker production.

pimplink · 08-28-2001, 06:37 PM

That's fucking hilarious. Maybe you should shoot it with a DVD cam and convert it to MPG, post it a free server and post the link here. That would be hell a funny to watch.

tolik · 08-28-2001, 06:44 PM

fun....

------------------
Offshoreclicks - it Rulez 3c per raw click, 0.035 per imps
Sell Your Exit Here !!!
Nex-cash - up to 4 c per click

McPornGuy · 08-28-2001, 07:04 PM

lmao is that what they do.

Wizzo · 08-28-2001, 07:06 PM

Remember there's a tradeshow going on, not far from Ibill's HQ, so imagine alot of staff is there this week...

Wizzo · 08-28-2001, 07:07 PM

However, you might be in the wrong end of the biz...Screenwriting may be your calling.

Mike69 · 08-28-2001, 07:27 PM

That was funny.....!!

Fortunatly I don't get that...

It's more like....

Mike : Dials special number....
IBill : Hi this is Ibill
Mike : Hi, This is Michael from Amat.....(never get to finish)
IBILL: Hold on Mike I'll transfer you to (my rep)..
(my rep): Hi Mike what can I do for you today???
Mike: Hi (my rep), I have a problem with a revshare account, I need it fixed...
(my rep): You got it, I'll fix it right now!

Problem solved.....

That what I get... AND I LIKE IT!!!!

Thanks Lens for making my job so easy

------------------
Michael Burns
Head Programmer for:
AmateurPages.com
ADULT.COM
EraserCash.com
GoFuckYourSelf.com
and more to come !!!
God I love this job!!!

eroswebmaster · 07-21-2003, 11:24 AM

LOL funny going through old friends.

It's like looking through a photo album.

08-28-2001, 09:54 AM	#3
CDSmith Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: My network is hosted at TECHIEMEDIA.net ...Wait, you meant where am I located at? Oh... okay, I'm in Winnipeg, Canada. Oops. :) Posts: 51,460	Damn that was good. Annoying, yes, but that's what made it good. I can't wait for the sequel (where the snoopervisor A. Hole actually goes for the gusto and picks up the phone herself/himself, and says in a robotic voice "all available operators are currently busy, after the tone leave your name and number and your ibill account, and one of our operators will call you back"....... and then she/he presses #9 on the keypad for a few seconds causing a tone. Then she let's you say your information, then she says "Thank you, goodbye") What quick thinking!!! That'll keep that rat bastard webmaster away for a few days at least. <font face="Verdana">___________ CD * <a href="http://www.erasercash.com/wm.html?ID=1380291" TARGET="_blank"><font face="Verdana" color="#FFCCCC">ERASERCASH!</font></a> Earn $35 per sale + webmaster referrals 4 LEVELS DEEP</font> * <a href="http://www.topbucks.com/affiliate/clickthru.cgi?id=1448" TARGET="_blank"><font color="#FFFFDD"> $40/signup, $50/recur, 65% partnerships</font></a> + free content, free daily galleries! * <a href="http://www.stiffycash.com/?referer=cdsmith" TARGET="_blank"><font color="#FFCCFF">Make $35 per $1.95 Trial!!</font></a> +Free content! Is that a stiffy or a wad of 50's?

07-21-2003, 11:24 AM	#12
eroswebmaster March 1st, 2003 Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Seat 4 @ Venetian Poker Room Posts: 20,295	LOL funny going through old friends. It's like looking through a photo album. __________________ For rent - ICQ 127-027-910 Click here for more details

08-28-2001, 09:44 AM	#1
eroswebmaster March 1st, 2003 Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Seat 4 @ Venetian Poker Room Posts: 20,295	Screenplay for indie short film involving ibill Fade in from black: Interior Adult Webmasters Bedroom/Office - Morning Coke cans are strewn about the desk top and newbie adult webmaster Mighty Joe Hung is sitting at his desk phone in hand, dialing a number. Phone Voice Over: "Thank you for calling iBill internet billing company. To continue this call in english please press 1." Joe pulls the receive from his ear, impatiently eyes the dial pad and presses 1. Phone Voice Over: "For a description of iBill internet billing company please press 1." Joe laughs to himself. Phone Voice Over: "To cancel an account with iBill internet billing company please press 2." Joe grows more impatient. Phone Voice Over: "To speak to one of our customer service representatives please press 3." A smile crosses Joe's face as he presses number 3. Phone Voice Over: "Please wait while we transfer you to one of our customer service representatives." Music begins to play softly over the phone. Joe begins to rock his head to the melodic beat. A pause in the music causes Joe to become alert. Joe: "Shit that was quick." Music begins to play again. A puzzled look crosses Joe's face. Joe: "Hmmm...I guess the cd skipped...maybe a glitch in their satellite download." The music pauses and once again Joe's excitement increases. This lasts only a moment as the music starts once again. Cut to: Interior iBill corporate headquarters. Customer Service Representative #1567 and Customer Service Supervisor A. Hole stand hovering over a phone in the dank dark quarters of this evil empire. A. Hole motions to CSR #1567 A. Hole: "Check it again." CSR #1567 quietly picks up the phone and listens in...his eyes widen and he quickly puts the receiver back down on it's base. CSR #1567 "Fuck he's still there what do we do?" A. Hole begins to pace the floor. A. Hole "I don't know check again. Why don't they just fucking hangup?!" Cut to: Interior Adult webmasters office/bedroom. The music coming over the phone pauses briefly again. Mighty Joe Hung waits to hear a voice. The music begins to play again. Camera pans back: Roll music: Fade to black: Roll credits: This has been A 40 Websites And A Hooker Production Written, Produced, And Directed For the gofuckyourself bbs By Eroswebmaster, webmaster TeeGeePee.com

08-28-2001, 09:46 AM	#2
Gary Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kimmykims couch Posts: 6,110	LOL, i could actually visualize it as i was reading.

08-28-2001, 11:30 AM	#4
deluxe Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 1,434	wow I almost couldn't handle the excitement...

08-28-2001, 06:25 PM	#5
eroswebmaster March 1st, 2003 Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Seat 4 @ Venetian Poker Room Posts: 20,295	Never got through today...guess I'm gonna have to just do the whole speaker phone thing again tomorrow. eros ------------------ This has been another 40 websites and a hooker production.

08-28-2001, 06:37 PM	#6
pimplink Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Closer than you think Posts: 9,535	That's fucking hilarious. Maybe you should shoot it with a DVD cam and convert it to MPG, post it a free server and post the link here. That would be hell a funny to watch.

08-28-2001, 06:44 PM	#7
tolik Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: inside my brain Posts: 2,035	fun.... ------------------ Offshoreclicks - it Rulez 3c per raw click, 0.035 per imps Sell Your Exit Here !!! Nex-cash - up to 4 c per click

08-28-2001, 07:04 PM	#8
McPornGuy Registered User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: usa Posts: 55	lmao is that what they do.

08-28-2001, 07:06 PM	#9
Wizzo 2011 GFY Hall of Fame! Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Back in Texas! Posts: 15,224	Remember there's a tradeshow going on, not far from Ibill's HQ, so imagine alot of staff is there this week...

08-28-2001, 07:07 PM	#10
Wizzo 2011 GFY Hall of Fame! Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Back in Texas! Posts: 15,224	However, you might be in the wrong end of the biz...Screenwriting may be your calling.

08-28-2001, 07:27 PM	#11
Mike69 Canadian, nuff said eh? Join Date: Jul 2000 Location: Under the coffee maker! Posts: 755	That was funny.....!! Fortunatly I don't get that... It's more like.... Mike : Dials special number.... IBill : Hi this is Ibill Mike : Hi, This is Michael from Amat.....(never get to finish) IBILL: Hold on Mike I'll transfer you to (my rep).. (my rep): Hi Mike what can I do for you today??? Mike: Hi (my rep), I have a problem with a revshare account, I need it fixed... (my rep): You got it, I'll fix it right now! Problem solved..... That what I get... AND I LIKE IT!!!! Thanks Lens for making my job so easy ------------------ Michael Burns Head Programmer for: AmateurPages.com ADULT.COM EraserCash.com GoFuckYourSelf.com and more to come !!! God I love this job!!!