Now girls please read this cause these are our Fuckign Rules - GoFuckYourself.com

Jman · 09-07-2004, 11:34 AM

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story.

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

So Girls ... Put UP or Shut Up

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. >Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thanks Haui for sharing this ;-)

Spunky · 09-07-2004, 11:35 AM

I am in shape. Round is a shape

Wiggles · 09-07-2004, 11:36 AM

if you plan to get any chicks this list will never work

Jman · 09-07-2004, 11:38 AM

Sorry if this as been around before just laughing my ass off.

All rules are #1 rules

Aly-Python · 09-07-2004, 11:38 AM

Those are great!

Tom_PMs · 09-07-2004, 11:39 AM

My favorite:

You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

BigWebRev · 09-07-2004, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by spunky1
I am in shape. Round is a shape

BradM · 09-07-2004, 11:40 AM

I love this one

EpicLisa · 09-07-2004, 11:40 AM

those are all easy rules to follow if you aren't into "playing games" with the guy

jm_247live · 09-07-2004, 11:41 AM

lol....very nice!!

neverlearn · 09-07-2004, 11:42 AM

bangman- · 09-07-2004, 11:43 AM

Good stuff.
Made me laugh

eiht_98 · 09-07-2004, 11:46 AM

Zerof8 · 09-07-2004, 11:50 AM

Thats great!
I need to get that carved in gold and hung on the wall so that when ever she does something wrong I can refer her to rule #1

emmanuelle · 09-07-2004, 11:51 AM

You're forgetting one important thing:

Women control the pussy. Ultimately it's in your best interest to see that she's happy

Adultnet · 09-07-2004, 11:52 AM

block · 09-07-2004, 11:52 AM

Great list.... Going to share this with some friends as well.

Kassidy · 09-07-2004, 11:53 AM

An oldie, but definitely a goodie

WiredGuy · 09-07-2004, 11:56 AM

Amen!! The complete rulebook published right here ladies!
WG

C-Bass · 09-07-2004, 11:56 AM

jwerd · 09-07-2004, 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by spunky1
I am in shape. Round is a shape

lmao

jade_dragon · 09-07-2004, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by EpicLisa
those are all easy rules to follow if you aren't into "playing games" with the guy

Real words from a smart woman.

If you stop accepting bullshit from a woman because she is hot and puts out then you do not have to worry about this shit. Being a man is not about mancho bullshit, it is about being on top of your game, knowing that what you want is what you should get because you truly deserve it and not being controled by pussy and blow jobs.

rml_bob · 09-07-2004, 06:44 PM

that's funny

Basic_man · 09-07-2004, 07:05 PM

pure energy · 09-07-2004, 07:09 PM

Good stuff bro! I'll send a copy to all my girl friends!

Steen2 · 09-07-2004, 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Wiggles
if you plan to get any chicks this list will never work

Playas rules

zentz · 09-07-2004, 08:00 PM

yeah, i like them

fr8 · 09-07-2004, 08:14 PM

I like how everyone rule started with at 1.

skyechase · 09-07-2004, 08:24 PM

To funny

I can try to follow the rules being a chick and all but occasionally I may faulter. So, does that mean I have to be punished or spanked? haha

[email protected]
ICQ: 246300603

AliciaK · 09-07-2004, 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Zerof8
Thats great!
I need to get that carved in gold and hung on the wall so that when ever she does something wrong I can refer her to rule #1

rip raster · 09-07-2004, 09:18 PM

That is fuckin awsome man, I love it

09-07-2004, 11:35 AM	#2
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,944	I am in shape. Round is a shape __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

09-07-2004, 11:36 AM	#3
Wiggles Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 14,423	if you plan to get any chicks this list will never work __________________ no sig

09-07-2004, 11:38 AM	#4
Jman Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Canuckstikan Posts: 22,767	Sorry if this as been around before just laughing my ass off. All rules are #1 rules __________________ email: [email protected] Best AI Affiliate Program We also do WL at $0.00 upfront costs FantasyXXX.AI Teams: jean.francois.laverdiere TG: @jman1216

09-07-2004, 11:38 AM	#5
Aly-Python Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: West Hollywood Posts: 1,439	Those are great! __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

09-07-2004, 11:39 AM	#6
Tom_PMs Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 2,049	My favorite: You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. __________________ You've read it, you can't unread it.

09-07-2004, 11:34 AM	#1
Jman Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Canuckstikan Posts: 22,767	Now girls please read this cause these are our Fucking Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! So Girls ... Put UP or Shut Up 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. >Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round is a shape. Thanks Haui for sharing this ;-) __________________ email: [email protected] Best AI Affiliate Program We also do WL at $0.00 upfront costs FantasyXXX.AI Teams: jean.francois.laverdiere TG: @jman1216 Last edited by Jman; 09-07-2004 at 11:35 AM..

09-07-2004, 11:40 AM	#8
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	I love this one

09-07-2004, 11:40 AM	#9
EpicLisa Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 305	those are all easy rules to follow if you aren't into "playing games" with the guy __________________ PIMPDOG ROCKS MY WORLD!! [email protected]

09-07-2004, 11:41 AM	#10
jm_247live Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: florida/philly Posts: 1,536	lol....very nice!! __________________ ICQ 280987151 [email protected]

09-07-2004, 11:42 AM	#11
neverlearn Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Banners, FPA, HPA, FLASH, Illustration, Web Design, Print, posters, business cards, LOGOS ...ICQ 210-450-833 Posts: 2,085	__________________ DICK TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.

09-07-2004, 11:43 AM	#12
bangman- So Fucking Banned Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 293	Good stuff. Made me laugh

09-07-2004, 11:46 AM	#13
eiht_98 Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: EU Posts: 6,103

09-07-2004, 11:50 AM	#14
Zerof8 Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Kansas City Posts: 1,245	Thats great! I need to get that carved in gold and hung on the wall so that when ever she does something wrong I can refer her to rule #1 __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.

09-07-2004, 11:51 AM	#15
emmanuelle Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Oh Canada! Posts: 3,662	You're forgetting one important thing: Women control the pussy. Ultimately it's in your best interest to see that she's happy

09-07-2004, 11:52 AM	#16
Adultnet Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 8,713	lol __________________ TrafficCashGold Paying Webmasters Since 1996! Awesome Conversions! Fast Weekly Payments! Over 125 Tours!

09-07-2004, 11:52 AM	#17
block Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Winnipeg, Canada - cough check sig cough Posts: 1,258	Great list.... Going to share this with some friends as well. __________________ ICQ - 19961769

09-07-2004, 11:53 AM	#18
Kassidy Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Vancouverish... ICQ# 111432084 Posts: 1,219	An oldie, but definitely a goodie __________________ The ORIGINAL micro niche program- All Original and exclusive content. Paying 60% recurring through CCBill, FHG, free content & gallery templates Well researched niches with on-target content. SUBSTANCE SELLS!

09-07-2004, 11:56 AM	#19
WiredGuy Pounding Googlebot Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 34,482	Amen!! The complete rulebook published right here ladies! WG __________________ I play with Google.

09-07-2004, 11:56 AM	#20
C-Bass Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: th3 1nt3Rwebz Posts: 3,153	__________________ "Unhappy with the riches 'cause you're piss poor morally." Trade traffic? - Highdef Blog

09-07-2004, 06:44 PM	#23
rml_bob Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Las Vegas, Nevada Posts: 370	that's funny

09-07-2004, 07:05 PM	#24
Basic_man Programming King Pin Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Montreal Posts: 27,360	__________________ UUGallery Builder - automated photo/video gallery plugin for Wordpress! Stop looking! Checkout Naked Hosting, online since 1999 !

09-07-2004, 07:09 PM	#25
pure energy Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 4,274	Good stuff bro! I'll send a copy to all my girl friends! __________________ Click Here to get $42 a sale AND Get FREE MGP Coaching from WebmasterLabor.Com Sign up above then EMAIL info (( at )) webmasterlabor DOT com for your free 1 to 1 MGP coaching

09-07-2004, 08:00 PM	#27
zentz Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 8,053	yeah, i like them __________________ Programs that owe me money ---- Epassporte.com ~ $2700 \| Protraffic.com ~ $2600 \| XonDemand.com ~ $3000 Email: [email protected]

09-07-2004, 08:14 PM	#28
fr8 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 5,074	I like how everyone rule started with at 1. __________________ █ joesmut (a) gmail Dot com █ Full Stack Developer

09-07-2004, 08:24 PM	#29
skyechase Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 510	To funny I can try to follow the rules being a chick and all but occasionally I may faulter. So, does that mean I have to be punished or spanked? haha [email protected] ICQ: 246300603 Last edited by skyechase; 09-07-2004 at 08:28 PM..

09-07-2004, 09:18 PM	#31
rip raster Confirmed User Join Date: May 2001 Location: Everville Posts: 2,851	That is fuckin awsome man, I love it