Oracle's guide on how to get laid. - GoFuckYourself.com

Oracle Porn · 08-08-2004, 10:43 PM

well im not gonna bullshit too much, lets start:

go out to a club.
before you go there.... prepare....

1) Wear nice cloths, fashionable, not your comfy baggie pants from walmart you got for $9.95 4 years ago.

2) Take a shower, put deodorant on and body spray, chicks LOVE it when a guy smells good. and put on LOTS of cologne before you go out, it will dry out but will be enough to get the chick to notice you smell good.

3) If you got too much hair, a unibrow or anything of that sort, take it down.

4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.

go out, if you got a shitty $500 car get a cab or ask your friend your going with for a ride.

never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12.

when you get there, don't go straight it, check out around you, who is around, how are the chicks, if the place looks dead find another place.

when you get it, check out the scene, check whats going on, get yourself a drink, loosen up.

once you got yourself a drink or two, chew some fucking gum, nothing girls despise the most then some guy smelling like an alcoholic.

get on the dance floor, dont stand there like a fucking retard and stare and the guys that are dancing hooking up with all the hot chicks.

once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink....

in case you make contact with some chicks who responds disgustedly don't give up, move on, there are 100's of hot chicks in the club looking for a nice dick to hump on....

more when this thread hits 100 posts...

Lace · 08-08-2004, 10:45 PM

pxxx · 08-08-2004, 10:45 PM

Im goin to try that sounds great.

RightHandMan · 08-08-2004, 10:45 PM

!!DISCLAIMER!!

Use this information at your own risk...

Spunky · 08-08-2004, 10:46 PM

If I followed your advice,I would be taking walks in the park sucking cock..oh wait

Oracle Porn · 08-08-2004, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RightHandMan
!!DISCLAIMER!!

Use this information at your own risk...

see troll's nick

justfreemovies · 08-08-2004, 10:47 PM

funny but its all true

pure energy · 08-08-2004, 10:47 PM

Thanks for the tip

korzon · 08-08-2004, 10:48 PM

oh my

lol

oracleporn you are so right and yet so wrong at the same time

riosluts · 08-08-2004, 10:48 PM

umm what do u do if u can't dance?

Oracle Porn · 08-08-2004, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by justfreemovies
funny but its all true

I don't find it amusing.

Lace · 08-08-2004, 10:48 PM

If you didn't already know this info, theres something wrong....More along the lines of common sense

Oracle Porn · 08-08-2004, 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by riosluts
umm what do u do if u can't dance?

take some dance classes or sit yo ass at home.

EscortBiz · 08-08-2004, 10:50 PM

hey any tips on how to dance

NoCarrier · 08-08-2004, 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
well im not gonna bullshit too much, lets start:

go out to a club.
before you go there.... prepare....

1) Wear nice cloths, fashionable, not your comfy baggie pants from walmart you got for $9.95 4 years ago.

2) Take a shower, put deodorant on and body spray, chicks LOVE it when a guy smells good. and put on LOTS of cologne before you go out, it will dry out but will be enough to get the chick to notice you smell good.

3) If you got too much hair, a unibrow or anything of that sort, take it down.

4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.

go out, if you got a shitty $500 car get a cab or ask your friend your going with for a ride.

never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12.

when you get there, don't go straight it, check out around you, who is around, how are the chicks, if the place looks dead find another place.

when you get it, check out the scene, check whats going on, get yourself a drink, loosen up.

once you got yourself a drink or two, chew some fucking gum, nothing girls despise the most then some guy smelling like an alcoholic.

get on the dance floor, dont stand there like a fucking retard and stare and the guys that are dancing hooking up with all the hot chicks.

once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink....

in case you make contact with some chicks who responds disgustedly don't give up, move on, there are 100's of hot chicks in the club looking for a nice dick to hump on....

more when this thread hits 100 posts...

Yeah.. We know what happened last time you followed your own guidelines..

RightHandMan · 08-08-2004, 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
see troll's nick

Hardly a troll...props to you on divulging such useful information...Im trying to get this thread to the 100th post mark so that you will share more with us...

Lace · 08-08-2004, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NoCarrier
Yeah.. We know what happened last time you followed your own guidelines..

Groove · 08-08-2004, 10:56 PM

How long did it take you to devise this innovative strategy?

It sounds like wisdom born of years of trial and error

Fletch XXX · 08-08-2004, 10:57 PM

you might try moving out of moms house before giving advice on women.

real women laugh at kids who live with their parents.

go try to impress your friends and not us.

escorpio · 08-08-2004, 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
see troll's nick

ownage

cherrylula · 08-08-2004, 11:00 PM

eww do chicks really dig smelly dance floor fags? gross.

Don't forget the sock in your pants.

Doctor Dre · 08-08-2004, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NoCarrier
Yeah.. We know what happened last time you followed your own guidelines..

OMFG you are the king man

Fletch XXX · 08-08-2004, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn

never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12.

the funniest part about this thread is Oracle Porn isnt even old enough to get into a REAL CLUB

you cant even buy a girl a drink how you giving advice about them?

still got a couple years before you can get int

Doctor Dre · 08-08-2004, 11:02 PM

About the cologne ... Don't wear too much . once you are out of the club, it stinks

EviLGuY · 08-08-2004, 11:02 PM

Shouldn't you know how to do something before you write a guide about it?

xxxdesign-net · 08-08-2004, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her

Fletch XXX · 08-08-2004, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by EviLGuY
Shouldn't you know how to do something before you write a guide about it?

the similarities between this and the "get your TGP to 300k in 6 days" lil2rich4u thread are staggering

beemk · 08-08-2004, 11:04 PM

the blind leading the blind

xxxdesign-net · 08-08-2004, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX
the funniest part about this thread is Oracle Porn isnt even old enough to get into a REAL CLUB

you cant even buy a girl a drink how you giving advice about them?

still got a couple years before you can get int

hey give him a break.. he learned alot during his trip to Israel...!

NoCarrier · 08-08-2004, 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX
the similarities between this and the "get your TGP to 300k in 6 days" lil2rich4u thread are staggering

Holy Shit! You're right.. Damn.. That's scary..

I mean, who the fuck wants to be a lil2rich4u2 poser? (no offense rich..)

hydro · 08-08-2004, 11:05 PM

i pick up girls at starbucks, they seem to have an addiction for that shit

cosis · 08-08-2004, 11:07 PM

take a shower? damn no wonder i havent been getting laid

beemk · 08-08-2004, 11:09 PM

its funny that people who think that your hair, clothes, car, etc really matter for bagging girls, yeah it matters a little bit but only guys with game get girls. chances are any guy that uses this advice without any game will just dance with a girl all night and then she will ditch him.

hydro · 08-08-2004, 11:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by beemk
its funny that people who think that your hair, clothes, car, etc really matter for bagging girls, yeah it matters a little bit but only guys with game get girls. chances are any guy that uses this advice without any game will just dance with a girl all night and then she will ditch him.

very true, and you don't want to over do it on stuff like clothes, car etc. Then all you will get is gold diggers

Persius · 08-08-2004, 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by BMI Lace
If you didn't already know this info, theres something wrong....More along the lines of common sense

Oracle Porn · 08-08-2004, 11:12 PM

you guys are funny, so funny that I probebly get laid in a months more than all of you in a year....

cosis · 08-08-2004, 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
you guys are funny, so funny that I probebly get laid in a months more than all of you in a year....

men or women?

NoCarrier · 08-08-2004, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cosis
men or women?

Those in between.

Holly · 08-08-2004, 11:30 PM

holy christ

I think I just peed on myself a little bit.

Plus my hand is cramping because I was furiously scrolling to see if NoCarrier and MetaMan had replied to him yet.

Blondie23 · 08-09-2004, 12:17 AM

Honey that advice is great for some.. but if a guy is carrying some extra lbs and not young and trendy.. i dont think throwing his weight around on the dance floor and working up a sweat (mixed with that strong cologne) is gonna guarantee him some puntang.

Nothing more unsexy than a guy trying too hard.. i much prefer the laid back guys who would rather just be themselves.

each to their own tho!

Kard63 · 08-09-2004, 12:43 AM

I cant dance and I'm always hot I'd start sweating if I did.

Oracle's advise isn't bad. He can't give you the right attitude, and he does look better than what most of you (men) have posted.

BTW who wants to fuck a bunch of random club hoes? Since I only like long meaningful relationships firneds of friends or some shit like that is best for me, lol. I mean if we all go have fun great, and if we try to go have fun and dont, I can sneak out

TDF · 08-09-2004, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX
you might try moving out of moms house before giving advice on women.

real women laugh at kids who live with their parents.

go try to impress your friends and not us.

so true

hydro · 08-09-2004, 12:51 AM

just watch blind date and do the exact oppisite of what those guys do and say.

Face (o_0) · 08-09-2004, 12:53 AM

we almost at 100 yet

bhutocracy · 08-09-2004, 12:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
well im not gonna bullshit too much, lets start:

go out to a club.
before you go there.... prepare....

1) Wear nice cloths, fashionable, not your comfy baggie pants from walmart you got for $9.95 4 years ago.

2) Take a shower, put deodorant on and body spray, chicks LOVE it when a guy smells good. and put on LOTS of cologne before you go out, it will dry out but will be enough to get the chick to notice you smell good.

3) If you got too much hair, a unibrow or anything of that sort, take it down.

4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.

go out, if you got a shitty $500 car get a cab or ask your friend your going with for a ride.

never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12.

when you get there, don't go straight it, check out around you, who is around, how are the chicks, if the place looks dead find another place.

when you get it, check out the scene, check whats going on, get yourself a drink, loosen up.

once you got yourself a drink or two, chew some fucking gum, nothing girls despise the most then some guy smelling like an alcoholic.

get on the dance floor, dont stand there like a fucking retard and stare and the guys that are dancing hooking up with all the hot chicks.

once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink....

in case you make contact with some chicks who responds disgustedly don't give up, move on, there are 100's of hot chicks in the club looking for a nice dick to hump on....

more when this thread hits 100 posts...

..

You're a virgin aren't you?

DIMITRY-CHEKIN · 08-09-2004, 01:04 AM

well. here you not gonna get laid, but you can do something else. :Graucho

<a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a>

sexcarpet.com

<a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a>

DIMITRY-CHEKIN · 08-09-2004, 01:10 AM

[IMG]<a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a>[/IMG]
:BangBang:

DIMITRY-CHEKIN · 08-09-2004, 01:12 AM

Oncle_Benny · 08-09-2004, 03:24 AM

Babagirls · 08-09-2004, 03:29 AM

4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

bullshit. a lot of girls love the nice jeans, comfy but nice lookin white shirt and a (CLEAN! not covered in old sweat stains & dirt) baseball hat.

trust me.

08-08-2004, 10:43 PM	#1
Oracle Porn Affiliate Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Icq: 94-399-723 Posts: 24,433	Oracle's guide on how to get laid. well im not gonna bullshit too much, lets start: go out to a club. before you go there.... prepare.... 1) Wear nice cloths, fashionable, not your comfy baggie pants from walmart you got for $9.95 4 years ago. 2) Take a shower, put deodorant on and body spray, chicks LOVE it when a guy smells good. and put on LOTS of cologne before you go out, it will dry out but will be enough to get the chick to notice you smell good. 3) If you got too much hair, a unibrow or anything of that sort, take it down. 4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not. go out, if you got a shitty $500 car get a cab or ask your friend your going with for a ride. never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12. when you get there, don't go straight it, check out around you, who is around, how are the chicks, if the place looks dead find another place. when you get it, check out the scene, check whats going on, get yourself a drink, loosen up. once you got yourself a drink or two, chew some fucking gum, nothing girls despise the most then some guy smelling like an alcoholic. get on the dance floor, dont stand there like a fucking retard and stare and the guys that are dancing hooking up with all the hot chicks. once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink.... in case you make contact with some chicks who responds disgustedly don't give up, move on, there are 100's of hot chicks in the club looking for a nice dick to hump on.... more when this thread hits 100 posts... __________________

08-08-2004, 10:45 PM	#2
Lace Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 16,116	__________________ Your Paysite Partner Strength In Numbers! StickyDollars \| RadicalCash \| KennysPennies \| HomegrownCash

08-08-2004, 10:45 PM	#4
RightHandMan Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 1,694	!!DISCLAIMER!! Use this information at your own risk... __________________

08-08-2004, 10:46 PM	#5
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,949	If I followed your advice,I would be taking walks in the park sucking cock..oh wait __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-08-2004, 10:47 PM	#7
justfreemovies Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Springfield, Illinois Posts: 1,150	funny but its all true __________________ Signature views since 1/13/11 If you can read this, your ad could be here. Sig for rent www.BlogMilfs.com Domain for sale Click for details

08-08-2004, 10:45 PM	#3
pxxx First African GFY Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: New Jersey Posts: 12,114	Im goin to try that sounds great.

08-08-2004, 10:47 PM	#8
pure energy Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 4,274	Thanks for the tip __________________ Click Here to get $42 a sale AND Get FREE MGP Coaching from WebmasterLabor.Com Sign up above then EMAIL info (( at )) webmasterlabor DOT com for your free 1 to 1 MGP coaching

08-08-2004, 10:48 PM	#9
korzon Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 1,524	oh my lol oracleporn you are so right and yet so wrong at the same time

08-08-2004, 10:48 PM	#10
riosluts Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 5,250	umm what do u do if u can't dance? __________________

08-08-2004, 10:50 PM	#14
EscortBiz Fuck Checks, CASH only! Join Date: May 2002 Location: New York City Posts: 19,422	hey any tips on how to dance __________________ Spanking, Medical Fetish, Sleeping, Strap-on Anal Lesbians, Girls Fucking Guys, Handjob site REAL HOT, Shemales, Anal and Ass Licking sites 100% Real EXCLUSIVE with amazing retention, ccbill payouts, lots of content FREE FTP HOSTING Promote the largest and oldest member paid escort site, Converts 10 times better then any dating site, CCBill payouts ICQ# 158802076

08-08-2004, 10:56 PM	#18
Groove Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 3,852	How long did it take you to devise this innovative strategy? It sounds like wisdom born of years of trial and error

08-08-2004, 10:57 PM	#19
Fletch XXX GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: that 504 Posts: 60,840	you might try moving out of moms house before giving advice on women. real women laugh at kids who live with their parents. go try to impress your friends and not us. __________________ Want an Android App for your tube, membership, or free site? Need banners or promo material? Hit us up (ICQ Fletch: 148841377) or email me fletchxxx at gmail.com - recent work - About me

08-08-2004, 11:00 PM	#21
cherrylula lol Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 15,969	eww do chicks really dig smelly dance floor fags? gross. Don't forget the sock in your pants.

08-08-2004, 11:02 PM	#25
EviLGuY So Fucking Banned Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: malta Posts: 12,745	Shouldn't you know how to do something before you write a guide about it?

08-08-2004, 11:04 PM	#28
beemk CLICK HERE Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 20,829	the blind leading the blind __________________ I host with Vacares

08-08-2004, 11:05 PM	#31
hydro Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Dirty 3rd Posts: 4,216	i pick up girls at starbucks, they seem to have an addiction for that shit

08-08-2004, 11:07 PM	#32
cosis Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Beach Posts: 5,282	take a shower? damn no wonder i havent been getting laid

08-08-2004, 11:09 PM	#33
beemk CLICK HERE Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 20,829	its funny that people who think that your hair, clothes, car, etc really matter for bagging girls, yeah it matters a little bit but only guys with game get girls. chances are any guy that uses this advice without any game will just dance with a girl all night and then she will ditch him. __________________ I host with Vacares

08-08-2004, 11:12 PM	#36
Oracle Porn Affiliate Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Icq: 94-399-723 Posts: 24,433	you guys are funny, so funny that I probebly get laid in a months more than all of you in a year.... __________________

08-08-2004, 11:30 PM	#39
Holly Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Jesusland Posts: 10,017	holy christ I think I just peed on myself a little bit. Plus my hand is cramping because I was furiously scrolling to see if NoCarrier and MetaMan had replied to him yet. __________________ War National Damn Champions Eagle

08-09-2004, 12:17 AM	#40
Blondie23 Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 408	Honey that advice is great for some.. but if a guy is carrying some extra lbs and not young and trendy.. i dont think throwing his weight around on the dance floor and working up a sweat (mixed with that strong cologne) is gonna guarantee him some puntang. Nothing more unsexy than a guy trying too hard.. i much prefer the laid back guys who would rather just be themselves. each to their own tho!

08-09-2004, 12:43 AM	#41
Kard63 Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: 237 619 975 Posts: 8,944	I cant dance and I'm always hot I'd start sweating if I did. Oracle's advise isn't bad. He can't give you the right attitude, and he does look better than what most of you (men) have posted. BTW who wants to fuck a bunch of random club hoes? Since I only like long meaningful relationships firneds of friends or some shit like that is best for me, lol. I mean if we all go have fun great, and if we try to go have fun and dont, I can sneak out __________________

08-09-2004, 12:51 AM	#43
hydro Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Dirty 3rd Posts: 4,216	just watch blind date and do the exact oppisite of what those guys do and say.

08-09-2004, 12:53 AM	#44
Face (o_0) So Fucking Banned Join Date: May 2004 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 2,617	we almost at 100 yet

08-09-2004, 01:04 AM	#46
DIMITRY-CHEKIN Registered User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: flemington NJ Posts: 7	well. here you not gonna get laid, but you can do something else. :Graucho <a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a> sexcarpet.com <a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a> __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

08-09-2004, 01:10 AM	#47
DIMITRY-CHEKIN Registered User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: flemington NJ Posts: 7	[IMG]<a href="http://www.sexcarpet.com"><img border="0" src="http://www.sexcarpet.com/2U"></a>[/IMG] :BangBang: __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

08-09-2004, 01:12 AM	#48
DIMITRY-CHEKIN Registered User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: flemington NJ Posts: 7

08-09-2004, 03:24 AM	#49
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08-09-2004, 03:29 AM	#50
Babagirls Text Writer Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 18,812	4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ bullshit. a lot of girls love the nice jeans, comfy but nice lookin white shirt and a (CLEAN! not covered in old sweat stains & dirt) baseball hat. trust me. __________________ Need a Text Writer? Blogs\|Reviews\|Descriptions\|Paysites\|TGP's\|Stories ICQ: 397892500