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-   -   Oracle's guide on how to get laid. (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=338146)

Face (o_0) 08-09-2004 02:37 PM

100


gives these guys more tips :1orglaugh

TheWildcard 08-09-2004 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by justfreemovies
funny but its all true
I don't think it's supposed to be funny.

sixxxth_sense 08-09-2004 02:40 PM

this guide is worth 0! oracle porn never got laid and yet he's teaching the kids on GFY. The only time oracle got laid was when he waas 6 and his friend forced him to suck'm off! TRUE FUCKING STORY AS TOLD BY ORACLE HIMSELF

please:helpme this fucking fag!

Oracle Porn 08-09-2004 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sixxxth_sense
this guide is worth 0! oracle porn never got laid and yet he's teaching the kids on GFY. The only time oracle got laid was when he waas 6 and his friend forced him to suck'm off! TRUE FUCKING STORY AS TOLD BY ORACLE HIMSELF

please:helpme this fucking fag!

come back when you can make more then 2 sales a day.

and when I said I'll post more once this thread reaches 100, I really ment 200.

Repetitive Monkey 08-09-2004 02:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cosis
guide to getting laid

show a stacks of 100 dollars bills to girl
insert penis into vagina

Funniest post I have seen for a week. :thumbsup

Oracle Porn 08-09-2004 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Paul Waters
Why would we accept advice from a virgin?

:1orglaugh

dont you have to make some phone calls to the cops about a model being 1 hour late...fucking idiot.

Paul Waters 08-09-2004 02:54 PM

quote:Originally posted by Paul Waters
Why would we accept advice from a virgin?



dont you have to make some phone calls to the cops about a model being 1 hour late...fucking idiot.

We hit a sore spot...... No doubt remains!


:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Oracle Porn 08-09-2004 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Paul Waters
quote:Originally posted by Paul Waters
Why would we accept advice from a virgin?



dont you have to make some phone calls to the cops about a model being 1 hour late...fucking idiot.

We hit a sore spot...... No doubt remains!


:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh
you are a true moron, l'm pretty sure I got laid more times then you did...(without paying for it, like you do)

Steen2 08-09-2004 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oracle Porn
and sometimes those "club hoes" can surprise you...:winkwink:
Filming trannytrick.com footage?

sixxxth_sense 08-09-2004 02:59 PM

:1orglaugh this page 2 is way too funny!! hahaha, omg OraclePorn the shit u bring onto ur self!:1orglaugh

Juicy D. Links 08-09-2004 03:02 PM

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Oracle Porn 08-09-2004 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Steen2
Filming trannytrick.com footage?
:1orglaugh

NichePay_Manny 08-09-2004 04:59 PM

Good luck with that info :thumbsup

PlayGirl 08-09-2004 05:27 PM

there is nothing unsexier than a guy who's trying too hard :(

Oracle Porn 08-09-2004 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PlayGirl
there is nothing unsexier than a guy who's trying too hard :(
hehehe...and there's nothing funnier that a girl I want to fuck trying to get me in bed while I'm playing hard to get...

Juicy D. Links 02-27-2005 04:05 PM

hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

NoCarrier 02-27-2005 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Juicy D. Links
hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :thumbsup

yellowmenace 02-27-2005 04:10 PM

Nice tranny pic lol

DarkJedi 02-27-2005 04:16 PM

uh, only fags dance.

maxdaname 02-27-2005 04:23 PM

Wow! Classic Oracle moment!

Adultnet 02-27-2005 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oracle Porn
come back when you can make more then 2 sales a day.

and when I said I'll post more once this thread reaches 100, I really ment 200.

LoL this will be price less

yuvalus 02-27-2005 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oracle Porn
well im not gonna bullshit too much, lets start:

go out to a club.
before you go there.... prepare....

1) Wear nice cloths, fashionable, not your comfy baggie pants from walmart you got for $9.95 4 years ago.

2) Take a shower, put deodorant on and body spray, chicks LOVE it when a guy smells good. and put on LOTS of cologne before you go out, it will dry out but will be enough to get the chick to notice you smell good.

3) If you got too much hair, a unibrow or anything of that sort, take it down.

4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.

go out, if you got a shitty $500 car get a cab or ask your friend your going with for a ride.

never go out before the doors open at the club, if they open their doors at 11, be there at 12.

when you get there, don't go straight it, check out around you, who is around, how are the chicks, if the place looks dead find another place.

when you get it, check out the scene, check whats going on, get yourself a drink, loosen up.

once you got yourself a drink or two, chew some fucking gum, nothing girls despise the most then some guy smelling like an alcoholic.

get on the dance floor, dont stand there like a fucking retard and stare and the guys that are dancing hooking up with all the hot chicks.

once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink....

in case you make contact with some chicks who responds disgustedly don't give up, move on, there are 100's of hot chicks in the club looking for a nice dick to hump on....

more when this thread hits 100 posts...

guys he's 100% right
I did see him in clubs in he gets laid alot!

wjxxx 02-27-2005 04:41 PM

Thats funny thread

Doctor Hung 02-27-2005 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raf1
I don't use gel (my hair is about 3-4mm), I get drunk as fuck, rarely dance and somehow I usually come home with a pretty hot chick. There is no recipe for picking up girls. Some like metrosexual fags, some like men...

stop lying please no one believes you

Top_Floor 02-27-2005 04:45 PM

:1orglaugh

woj 02-27-2005 05:42 PM

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Young 02-27-2005 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doctor Hung
stop lying please no one believes you

get emmmmm

Holly 02-27-2005 05:48 PM

lol, blast from the past.

rollinOn20s 02-27-2005 05:49 PM

Wow, this thread is going completely nowhere, but its takng awhile!

reynold 02-27-2005 06:40 PM

Those tips sound effective. :)

Big Red Machine 02-27-2005 10:33 PM

This is some funny stuff, if your in a dance club then dance very enlightening.

Fizzgig 02-27-2005 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babagirls
4) don't wear a freaking hat, you don't go out with a hat...geez you will look like a damn red neck. get your hair done, gel or what not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

bullshit. a lot of girls love the nice jeans, comfy but nice lookin white shirt and a (CLEAN! not covered in old sweat stains & dirt) baseball hat.

trust me. :glugglug

Whenever I see a guy in a baseball cap in a club I automatically assume he's bald. :upsidedow

moltar 02-27-2005 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fizzgig
Whenever I see a guy in a baseball cap in a club I automatically assume he's bald. :upsidedow

if yo go to hip hop / jungle events, you'll see half the crowd wearing a hat :)

UtahSaints 02-27-2005 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oracle Porn
once you start dancing, make an eye contact with a girl you think is hot, if she makes some eye contact with you (and doesn't look disgusted) come a little closer to her and dance with her, if she responds (positively) and dances with you for a few min, ask her if she wants to come with you for a drink....

..

I bet you buy about 30-40 drinks a night yet you come home and pull the twinkie...
what a loser...


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