Credit card phone spammers: "The Owning"

[Amp]

Spammer: "Hi, is this AMp?"

Me: "Yes."

Spammer: "Has anyone talked to you recently about reducing your credit card debt and credit card interest rates?"

Me: "I have no credit card debt and my interest rate is 1%. Can you still help me?"

Spammer: "We can give you a 14% interest rate on a new _____ card combined with a free balance transfer from your old cards to consolidate your debt."

Me: "Did you hear one single word I just said?"

Spammer: "We can take your application right over the phone and doo everything for you at no cost to you, or we also have a website if that's more convenient for you."

Me: "Are you smoking crack or something? I said I have no debt and a 1% interest rate."

Spammer: Would you like to submit a free phone application? I can give you instant approval with up to a $1000 credit line, and also send you a booklet of checks that you can withdraw cash advances from your account for a very small fee. They're very helpful when you need cash immediately."

Me: "Is this some kind of a joke or something? Am I on some hidden camera tv show?"

Spammer: "Excellent choice AMp! I will transfer you to our application specialist to confirm that I have spoken with you about this and the application process should only take 5 or 10 minutes of your time. I'll transfer you now if you're ready..."

Me: "..........." (speechless)

Spammer: (click) (click).... (lame music)...... (more clicking)

Spammer's Assistant: "Hi AMp! You've made an excellent choice in..."

Me: "I'm gay."

Spammer's Assistant: "Excuse me sir?"

Me: "I'm gay."

Spammer's Assistant: "Okay, I'm confirming that you've spoken with ________ and I will just need some information to process your application before...."

Me: "I just gave you some information."

Spammer's Assistant: "I'm sorry?"

Me: "I just told you I'm gay. Isn't that relevant to the application? Can I get a lower interest rate if I'm gay?"

Spammer's Assistant: "I've.... I... I don't see how that would affect your credit application in th...."

Me: "Then I don't want it. I want special treatment on this matter, because god knows I deserve some, and if you can't do something for me, then I don't want it."

Spammer's Assistant: "YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOT SOME KIND OF JOKE! THIS IS MY JOB HERE! WHERE DO YOU GET OFF MAKING A JOK



(click)




fuckers.

[riosluts]

omg what assholes. good that people like that dont call me. they like dont listen at all

[Pornwolf]

That's classic! I can't wait to get phone spammed today!

[David!]

[CDSmith]

I've been using that old guy's suggestion from CNN (Andy Rooney), and just putting the phone down, not hanging it up, and just walking away from it. I let the spammer yap on for several minutes until he/she goes into the "sir... are you there? Sir??" routine..... then they eventually get the hint.

Rare is the company that calls again after I do that to them a few times.

[JulianSosa]

I hate those fuckers. Every time they call they say they are from some merhcant thing and I think it is regarding a merchant account and tell them I am home.

[4Pics]

[YentaGirl]

That was a pretty funny conversation. I bet he works at night in McDonalds messing up the orders there too...

[CDSmith]

The guy in the first part of that conversation needs to be bitchslapped something fierce.

[KMR Stitch]

Was this all done in Pidgon accent?

[Amp]

bastards call me at least once a day so I gotta keep thinking up new ways to fuck with them. Crackheads... all of them. They don't listen to a word you say, as long as they can keep you on the line they feel they're making progress.

[404]

i defecate on spammers from a very great height.

[Spunky]

Just say you'll be with them in a minute and leave the phone down until they hang up

[jacked]

Me: "I just told you I'm gay. Isn't that relevant to the application? Can I get a lower interest rate if I'm gay?"

hahah classic that has to be the best line of the convo

[boardersweetie]

I hate telemarketers... whenever they call me, I try to sell the person on the line something instead.

[Omorphos]

I go along with them so they think they have a sale... ask loads of questions about the product (they never know the answers) and then when it comes to the very end and I've wasted their time I tell them to fuck off.

[Illicit]

cant stand those fuckers...

[Rictor]

I just hang up.

[The Grim Reaper]

Originally posted by Omorphos
I go along with them so they think they have a sale... ask loads of questions about the product (they never know the answers) and then when it comes to the very end and I've wasted their time I tell them to fuck off.

heres a little twist on that idea..

When you begin , let them know your alone babysitting someones baby and you cant talk long because you have something cooking on the stove.. then , make like your really interested and want to purchase lots of whatever they are selling. Then once you have them thinking they are going to get the sale , you start screaming that the house is on fire and make like the baby has caught on fire.. then hang up on them..

[Mike Okitch]

Originally posted by Amp
bastards call me at least once a day so I gotta keep thinking up new ways to fuck with them. Crackheads... all of them. They don't listen to a word you say, as long as they can keep you on the line they feel they're making progress.

Funny one Amp. Here's one of the few things I did.

-let them yap and yap when I would get real close to the mic and scream off the top of my lungs about seeing a giant rat. For some reason, they weren't interested in me anymore.

-breathe heavily while humming "hmmmmm yeah...oh baby" "hmmmm yeah, low cost long distance is greeaAAAT!!!"

-speak in another language. If that's not possible, pretend speaking in another language

-pretend to be interested untill their "supervisor" comes on the line. Then say to the supervisor "What is THIS all about? He said he wanted to come over to have sex with MY WIFE ". Listen closely as you hear the doorknob get in trouble.

I got plenty of stories about this creditor that called my number thinking he spoke to whoever was owing him money, those are the best but I'm keeping them for another thread someday

[Vitasoy]

I hate those tele spammers.

[Sappy]

I used to be a telemarketer. Not selling anything but phoning people during their dinner to ask if they wanted to watch "a new pilot tv program and give us your opinions". The tape had some lame ass show from 1993 on it, which we would ask them two questions about and then fifty fucking questions about the 90 seconds of commercials on the tape.

99% of the people who call you are just as unhappy about it as you are. If it really bothers you, just hang up. Eight hours of getting screamed at by people isn't alot of fun.

Unless they're really stupid. Then by all means, fuck with them. Just be creative

[brand0n]

ars sig whores like your tv as well

[Amp]

Originally posted by brand0n
ars sig whores like your tv as well

you know, there is an option here that I exercise myself. Turning off the sigs.

No sigs = much faster viewing.

Also you'll find no sig below my name. Sigs are so 2003.

Live in the now. (unless of course whoring a sig for $20 bucks a month is all you got to cling to.)

[brizzad]

he said.. "WHERE DO YOU GET OFF MAKING A JOK!!" ?

[HAPPYPEEKERS]

LMAO!!! That is crazy!!!!

[acuk]

Nice one Amp
Recently moved house and within a week of getting a new BT ex directory phone line installed i started getting 'courtesy' calls from double glazing companies,
Kept one sucker on hold for five minutes then said i wasn't interested..
They waste my time, i'll waste there's back
Thing was i was interested in getting a quote, but i just can't bear the thought of giving my business to a bunch of lowlife spammers...

[Manowar]

I answer every phone call i get with the phrase "Kero Kero Kero" and pretend to not speak English

[foolio]

lol, nice one amp. I will have to try that one out next tiem I get a call from the spammers

[hova]

Originally posted by Amp


Me: "I just told you I'm gay. Isn't that relevant to the application? Can I get a lower interest rate if I'm gay?"

Spammer's Assistant: "I've.... I... I don't see how that would affect your credit application in th...."

Thats a fucking classic!

[MissGrim]

I've never really had a problem with telephone solicitors. Usually I briefly explain one of the following:

1. I have terrible credit and am not eligible for any new accounts.
2. I have a low income level and can not afford to buy anything.
3. I don't reward telemarketing by buying products (even products I approve of).

So far, everyone who's ever called has accepted my statement at face value and added me to their no call list. The people that call are just doing a job and I'm fairly sure they're not getting paid enough to be harassed or tormented just because many employers utilize that method of advertisement. I'd much rather answer a quick telephone call at home and give a brief and polite refusal to a person who's trying to earn a living than be stopped on the street by a "homeless" teenager who wants my money for nothing and seldom takes no for an answer... those are the people who's time I'd like to waste (agressive panhandling is really a problem in Portland, especially during the summer).

Sometimes the phone calls can be annoying (especially when you get them multiple times) but I really make an effort not to take out my frustration on the telemarketer... their job is unpleasant enough as it is.

[Jdoughs]

1. I doubt this call even happened...if it did the representive was fired after hanging up, any TSR (telephone sales representitive) taking CC applications over the phone is recorded...and BY LAW, and are not allowed to do that.

2. I doubt any of them work part time nights at wendys or mcdonalds, whatever it said. Where i live we have 3000 people employed by call centers, average rate is between 11 and 15$ an hour, PLUS bonuses.

3. Majority of TSR's laugh when you act like an asshole. But remember they have more of your PERSONAL INFO then your bank does. Not the best people to tell off. They can totally and anonymously ruin you.

4. Most TSR's are top calibre salesmen/women and blaming them for phoning you is assinine, if you dont want it say no thanks, after being told twice NO they must exit the call. Getting pissed just gives them something to laugh about at the water cooler.

5. Lay the phone down?..what are you fuckin retarded...like that hurts the guy calling...now he gets paid for fuck all instead of getting paid to call asshats.


Lastly ... I dialed New York City for 8 whole months, 10 hrs a day 6 days a week. 81% of the people i talked to were sales. Complain all you want, you wont find a better way to get cold call sales. For every person out there bitchin there is someone buyin.

class dismissed!!

[Jer]

Very good one, Amp!

Yesterday I got another call from a credit card company. They sent me a gold card after a long call months ago, but I didn't unblock it since I don't need another CC. Now they are sending me lots of mail and a few phone calls. I almost unblocked the card yesterday just to get rid of them.

[Jer]

I hate when the conversation starts with "Hi, can I please talk to (insert my full name here)?". I just don't say it isn't me and that "he" will be back in a week because it might be my bank or something important.

[Amp]

Originally posted by Jdoughs
1. I doubt this call even happened...if it did the representive was fired after hanging up, any TSR (telephone sales representitive) taking CC applications over the phone is recorded...and BY LAW, and are not allowed to do that.

2. I doubt any of them work part time nights at wendys or mcdonalds, whatever it said. Where i live we have 3000 people employed by call centers, average rate is between 11 and 15$ an hour, PLUS bonuses.

3. Majority of TSR's laugh when you act like an asshole. But remember they have more of your PERSONAL INFO then your bank does. Not the best people to tell off. They can totally and anonymously ruin you.

4. Most TSR's are top calibre salesmen/women and blaming them for phoning you is assinine, if you dont want it say no thanks, after being told twice NO they must exit the call. Getting pissed just gives them something to laugh about at the water cooler.

5. Lay the phone down?..what are you fuckin retarded...like that hurts the guy calling...now he gets paid for fuck all instead of getting paid to call asshats.


Lastly ... I dialed New York City for 8 whole months, 10 hrs a day 6 days a week. 81% of the people i talked to were sales. Complain all you want, you wont find a better way to get cold call sales. For every person out there bitchin there is someone buyin.

class dismissed!!

lol.... you're a fuckin' tool.

you think I give a fuck about the assholes that call me in my own home? I didn't ask them to call, I never signed up for the shit, and if I could I'd disconnect the fucking thing.

Someone calls me and interrupts my day with some lame fuckin' bullshit and consumes my time, I'm gonna consume theirs too. My goal is to get at least one person fired on every call. (two if I'm on a lucky streak)

[Jdoughs]

Originally posted by Amp
lol.... you're a fuckin' tool.

you think I give a fuck about the assholes that call me in my own home? I didn't ask them to call, I never signed up for the shit, and if I could I'd disconnect the fucking thing.

Someone calls me and interrupts my day with some lame fuckin' bullshit and consumes my time, I'm gonna consume theirs too. My goal is to get at least one person fired on every call. (two if I'm on a lucky streak)

Im a tool...your the fuckin idiot who didnt privatize your number then bitched when you got called.

And i never said you did care about them. I hope you dont think they care about you

And coming from someone who is in MARKETING...its a total fuckin joke.

Dont you have a doctor to go see?

[Jdoughs]

And BTW

Simply ask to be removed from the calling list.

I'll even help you out on that...there is 3 national credit reporting agency databases that you must contact to have your name removed, if you chosse not to then thats your call.

Any of the people who phone you will tell you the phone numbers.

[Amp]

Originally posted by Jdoughs
Im a tool...your the fuckin idiot who didnt privatize your number then bitched when you got called.

And coming from someone who is in SALES...its a total fuckin joke.

Dont you have a doctor to go see?

"privatize" my number? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? My number is unlisted and I change it every 6 months, and it is never updated with the CCs I already have. Those morons still got a number from 4 years and 3 homes ago.

Yet I still get endless phone spam, and junk snail mail in bulk every single damn day. My address I can't change, but my phone number changes all the damn time.

So please clue me in to this "privatizing" of my number. I'd love to know the secret.


i think it's you that needs to see a doctor dude.

[Jdoughs]

AMP....























I'll have one of our Customer Service Representives call you in the morning.

OK unlisted numbers....Did you tell your bank your new number?...or maybe your credit card issuer?
government agencies?
travel agents?

theres a million places they can get your number.

[Amp]

Originally posted by Jdoughs
AMP....























I'll have one of our Customer Service Representives call you in the morning.

OK unlisted numbers....Did you tell your bank your new number?...or maybe your credit card issuer?
government agencies?
travel agents?

theres a million places they can get your number.

last time I changed my number was aprox 4 months ago. There are literally 3 people on the planet that have this number, and one of them lives with me.

so where are the other 999,997 places they are getting it from?

[Jdoughs]

Yeah your right AMP.

I guess they never called you.

If my truths dont make sence then you figure it out

[EviLGuY]

Ha.. I fucking hate telemarkets.. but I love them. I ALWAYS fuck with them.

I had one guy going for 20 minutes about getting a lousy newspaper subscription.

[Amp]

Originally posted by Jdoughs
Yeah your right AMP.

I guess they never called you.

If my truths dont make sence then you figure it out

lol..... who are you trying to convince here, me or you?

All I know is I get endless annoying fucking phone calls for shit I have ZERO interest in. And like I said, they're gonna call me and interrupt my motherfucking day?! Cool. Don't want no bitchin' when I fuckin' screw with them for 45 minutes and end it by slamming the phone down.

Contrary to telemarketer belief, my number is NOT a fucking sales lead. Hence, the reason I change it every 6 months.

Unfortunately, they never seem to take the hint. And so, I will keep fucking with them with whatever stupidity comes to mind at the time that they call.


I'm sorry.... does that offend you somehow? Try being on THIS end of the fucking bullshit phone calls.



asshole.


take that up with your fucking supervisor.

[Jdoughs]

well like i said...you can have your name permanently removed from ALL calling lists...if they call you they get shut down.

But i guess my solution is to fuckin easy.

So just keep changing your phone number every 3 months and whining to people you know that they wont stop calling you.

Jeez man, read what i posted. I explained how it really is...not how i want it, if you dont want to know how to end the calls, then dont. No skin off my balls.

[Jdoughs]

Originally posted by Amp


I'm sorry.... does that offend you somehow? Try being on THIS end of the fucking bullshit phone calls.

asshole.

take that up with your fucking supervisor.

Sorry but i havent recieved a telemarketer call in over 3 years.

[Amp]

Originally posted by Jdoughs
well like i said...you can have your name permanently removed from ALL calling lists...if they call you they get shut down.

But i guess my solution is to fuckin easy.

So just keep changing your phone number every 3 months and whining to people you know that they wont stop calling you.

Jeez man, read what i posted. I explained how it really is...not how i want it, if you dont want to know how to end the calls, then dont. No skin off my balls.

hmmm...... the "please remove me" link at the bottom of each and every one of the 40000 email spams I get per day sounds real familiar to your "solution".

i don't think so. I'll keep changing my number thank you.

[Jdoughs]

Originally posted by Amp
hmmm...... the "please remove me" link at the bottom of each and every one of the 40000 email spams I get per day sounds real familiar to your "solution".

i don't think so. I'll keep changing my number thank you.

[Joe Citizen]

Originally posted by Amp
hmmm...... the "please remove me" link at the bottom of each and every one of the 40000 email spams I get per day sounds real familiar to your "solution".

i don't think so. I'll keep changing my number thank you.

par·a·noid ( P ) Pronunciation Key (pr-noid)
adj.

Exhibiting or characterized by extreme and irrational fear or distrust of others: a paranoid suspicion that the phone might be bugged.

[Jdoughs]

For all teh non-asshats here. There is also 3 major credit reporting agencies that give out your numbers to financial institutions, ill find the numbers when my wife gets to the office.

takin from ( http://www.ftc.gov/ )

Are You Getting Telemarketing Calls You Don?t Want?
Here's How to Stop Them

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) launched the National Do Not Call Registry to give Americans a choice about getting telemarketing calls at home. According to a recent Harris Interactive poll,92 percent of people who reported placing a number on the registry said they are receiving fewer calls; a total of 78 percent said they?re getting ?far fewer calls? or none at all.

If you think you put your number on the National Do Not Call Registry, and you?re still getting telemarketing sales calls, the Federal Trade Commission recommends that you:

Check to see that your number is on the registry. You can verify that your number is on the registry two ways: online at DONOTCALL.GOV (click on ?Verify A Registration?), or by calling 1-888-382-1222 (TTY 1-866-290-4236) from the phone number you wish to verify. Follow the prompts.

You also can add your number to the registry using the same Web site or phone number (call from the number you want to register). If you register online, you will receive an email from donotcall.gov as part of the confirmation process. You will need to click on the link in this email within 72 hours after you receive it. If you don?t click on the link in the email, the number you tried to register will not be added to the registry, and telemarketers may continue to call.

Understand that some calls are not covered. Once your number has been on the registry for three months, most telemarketing calls will stop. However, you still may get:
calls from ? or on behalf of ? political organizations, charities, and telephone surveyors;
calls from companies with whom you have an existing business relationship. A company may call you for 18 months after you make a purchase or three months after you submit an inquiry or application;
calls from companies you?ve given permission to call.

File a complaint. If your number has been on the registry for at least three months, and a telemarketer calls, complain to the FTC. Visit DONOTCALL.GOV or call 1-888-382-1222 (TTY1-866-290-4236). You?ll need to provide the date of the call and the phone number or name of the company that called you.

The FTC works for the consumer to prevent fraudulent, deceptive and unfair business practices in the marketplace and to provide information to help consumers spot, stop, and avoid them. To file a complaint or to get free information on consumer issues, visit www.ftc.gov or call toll-free, 1-877-FTC-HELP (1-877-382-4357); TTY: 1-866-653-4261. The FTC enters Internet, telemarketing, identity theft, and other fraud-related complaints into Consumer Sentinel, a secure, online database available to hundreds of civil and criminal law enforcement agencies in the U.S. and abroad.

[Jdoughs]

Looks alot like spam eh