I will pay you to help me win a dvd player from lendewd...... - GoFuckYourself.com

doc · 01-14-2001, 12:15 PM

I would really like to win a dvd player from lensman and if you guys will help me do this I'll pay ya with a funny.
Please, I'm not asking for your first born kid...just let me know if I made ya at least smile with this one......
=================================
They say the happiest days in life are the day you buy a boat and the day you
sell it!! Well, here's a good BOAT story!!

Joe and John were identical twins. Joe owned an old dilapidated boat and kept
pretty much to himself. One day he rented out his boat to a group of
out-of-staters who sank it.

Joe spent all day trying to salvage as much stuff as he could and was out of
touch all that day and most of the evening.

Unbeknownst to him, his brother John's wife died suddenly. When he got back
on shore he went into town to pick up a few things at the grocery.

A kind old neighbor woman mistook him for John and said: "I'm so sorry for
your loss. You must feel terrible."

Joe, thinking she was talking about his boat said: "Hell no! Fact is I'm sort
of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her
bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was
always holding water. She had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole
in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked
like crazy. I guess what finally finished
her off was when I rented her to those four guys looking for a good time. I
warned them that she wasn't very good and smelled bad. But they wanted her
anyway.
The darn fools tried to get in her all at one time and she split right up the
middle!"

The old woman fainted.

------------------
Keep on truckin,But watch out for the idiots

OzKaNoz · 01-14-2001, 12:22 PM

LOL
Good one Doc

Oz

doc · 01-14-2001, 12:25 PM

Thank you OZ.

OzKaNoz · 01-14-2001, 12:27 PM

Why should you never use Crisco to masturbate with?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.Because it's shorting!

Sorry, I know that was bad.
Oz

OzKaNoz · 01-14-2001, 12:28 PM

Your Welcome!

doc · 01-14-2001, 12:30 PM

You need help dewd...lol
I tell ya what..if this one dont make em smile...I do have one that I posted elswhere about a-t-and-t phone call that will bust their sides.

------------------
Keep on truckin,But watch out for the idiots

OzKaNoz · 01-14-2001, 12:33 PM

Bake · 01-14-2001, 03:29 PM

You are to funny Doc please keep posting those Jokes it makes the day a little better
Bake

The Bringer · 12-03-2003, 08:12 AM

I exist too.

Phoenix · 12-03-2003, 08:15 AM

haha...nice one..good luck with the dvd player

Squito · 12-03-2003, 08:16 AM

01-14-2001, 12:15 PM	#1
doc Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: On 15 acres of leave me the fuck alone. Posts: 48	I will pay you to help me win a dvd player from lendewd...... I would really like to win a dvd player from lensman and if you guys will help me do this I'll pay ya with a funny. Please, I'm not asking for your first born kid...just let me know if I made ya at least smile with this one...... ================================= They say the happiest days in life are the day you buy a boat and the day you sell it!! Well, here's a good BOAT story!! Joe and John were identical twins. Joe owned an old dilapidated boat and kept pretty much to himself. One day he rented out his boat to a group of out-of-staters who sank it. Joe spent all day trying to salvage as much stuff as he could and was out of touch all that day and most of the evening. Unbeknownst to him, his brother John's wife died suddenly. When he got back on shore he went into town to pick up a few things at the grocery. A kind old neighbor woman mistook him for John and said: "I'm so sorry for your loss. You must feel terrible." Joe, thinking she was talking about his boat said: "Hell no! Fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always holding water. She had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to those four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good and smelled bad. But they wanted her anyway. The darn fools tried to get in her all at one time and she split right up the middle!" The old woman fainted. ------------------ Keep on truckin,But watch out for the idiots

12-03-2003, 08:15 AM	#10
Phoenix BACON BACON BACON Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Poems everybody, the laddie fancies himself a poet Posts: 35,462	haha...nice one..good luck with the dvd player __________________ Skype Phoenixskype1 Telegram PhoenixBrad https://quantads.io

12-03-2003, 08:16 AM	#11
Squito Registered User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: TDOT Posts: 72	__________________ **[

01-14-2001, 12:22 PM	#2
OzKaNoz Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Deep With In Your Mind Posts: 1,834	LOL Good one Doc Oz

01-14-2001, 12:25 PM	#3
doc Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: On 15 acres of leave me the fuck alone. Posts: 48	Thank you OZ.

01-14-2001, 12:27 PM	#4
OzKaNoz Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Deep With In Your Mind Posts: 1,834	Why should you never use Crisco to masturbate with? . . . . . . .Because it's shorting! Sorry, I know that was bad. Oz

01-14-2001, 12:28 PM	#5
OzKaNoz Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Deep With In Your Mind Posts: 1,834	Your Welcome!

01-14-2001, 12:30 PM	#6
doc Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: On 15 acres of leave me the fuck alone. Posts: 48	You need help dewd...lol I tell ya what..if this one dont make em smile...I do have one that I posted elswhere about a-t-and-t phone call that will bust their sides. ------------------ Keep on truckin,But watch out for the idiots

01-14-2001, 12:33 PM	#7
OzKaNoz Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Deep With In Your Mind Posts: 1,834	LOL

01-14-2001, 03:29 PM	#8
Bake Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Outback of bumfuck Aussie Posts: 5,273	You are to funny Doc please keep posting those Jokes it makes the day a little better Bake

12-03-2003, 08:12 AM	#9
The Bringer So Fucking Banned Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Right behind you, staring schemingly into your frail skull... Posts: 165	I exist too.