CDSmith

INNER SKELETON
A 63 yr-old widow was admitted to the hospital in Recife, Brazil, suffering
abdominal pains. X-rays showed that she was carrying a 20 Inch long skeleton
of a fetus which
she conceived a decade earlier. It had become lodged outside the womb and was
never expelled from her body.


PRICKLY PAIR
In Michigan, a man came into the ER with lacerations to his penis. He
complained that his wife had "...a rat in her privates..." and it bit him
during sex. After an examination of his wife, it was revealed that she had a
surgical needle left inside her after a recent hysterectomy.


PING PONG ANYONE?
A 20 yr-old man came into the ER with a stony mass in his rectum. He said
that he and his boyfriend were fooling around with concrete mix, then his
boyfriend had the idea of pouring the mix into his anus using a funnel. The
concrete then hardened, causing constipation and pain. Under general
anesthesia, a perfect concrete cast of the man's rectum was removed...along
with a ping pong ball.


BLIND DRUNK
A drunk staggered into a Pennsylvania ER complaining of severe pain while
trying to remove his contact lenses. He said that they would come out
halfway, but they always popped back in. A nurse tried to help using a
suction pump, but without success. Finally, a doctor examined him and
discovered the man did not have his contact lenses in at all. He had been
trying to rip out the membrane of his cornea.

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