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Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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#1 |
Suck it!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Who wants to know?
Posts: 4,432
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![]() Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your..."
Customer: "Hi, I'd like to order." Operator: "May I have your NIDN first, sir?" Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610." Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Jones . I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Which number are you calling from, sir?" Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?" Operator: "We're wired into the system, sir." Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas..." Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir." Customer: "Whaddya mean?" Operator: "Sir, your medical records indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice." Customer: "Damn. What do you recommend, then?" Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Yogurt Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it" Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?" Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion." Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then. What's the damage?" Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids, sir. The 'damage,' as you put it, heh, heh, comes $49.99." Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number." Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit." Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here." Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn." Customer: "Never mind. Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?" Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward." Customer: "How the hell do you know I'm riding a bike?" Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid up, so I just assumed that you'd be using it." Customer: "@#%/$@&?#!" Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop." Customer: (Speechless) Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?" Customer: "No, nothing. oh, yeah, don't forget the two free liters of Coke your ad says I get with the pizzas." Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics.
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#2 |
So Fucking Banned
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: 420Calendar.com
Posts: 17,920
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damn, did you made that all by yourself ?
good one though ![]() |
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#3 |
Affiliate
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Icq: 94-399-723
Posts: 24,433
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#4 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2001
Posts: 5,856
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lol
more like 2005
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the revolution is coming. |
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#5 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Toronto-I would rather DIE of thirst, then drink from the cup of MEDIOCRITY!
Posts: 2,055
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LOL....very inventive
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#6 |
My time is coming...
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Europe --- eMail: service(at)badasscompany.com --- ICQ: 60288510
Posts: 7,476
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nice written.
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If lesbian anal is wrong, I don't want to be right. |
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#7 |
Adult Locals
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 25,450
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very nice
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#8 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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#9 |
Text Writer
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 18,812
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Hahaha!! Thats good.......i called the pizza shop a few weeks ago to order a pizza....they asked me if i would like to have the "usual"...didnt know they recorded previous orders lol Takes one min to order a pizza now.
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#10 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 768
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Very nice
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#11 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,045
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#12 |
We need more free porn
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Montreal
Posts: 16,356
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#13 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sweden
Posts: 30,069
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hahaha thats fucking funny
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gfynicky @ gmail.com |
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#14 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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#15 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 1,366
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That was the first time I have seen a post that long and acturally liked it! great job man!
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Email:[email protected] Site: http://TheScreamingO.com Program: http://http://www.idevaffiliate.com Skype: theharvman ICQ: 150092593 |
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#16 |
Suck it!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Who wants to know?
Posts: 4,432
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Heh I wish I could take credit for it but I don't know the original author. It was passed to me in an email and made me laugh.
Glad you're all enjoying it ![]()
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#17 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Nebrasarkantucky
Posts: 930
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someone needs to bump this thread in 2010
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#18 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: I'm everywhere Bitches!!
Posts: 1,656
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ok?
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#19 | |
Suck it!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Who wants to know?
Posts: 4,432
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Quote:
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#20 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Canadian this !!!
Posts: 8,532
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hehe
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sig for sale. ICQ :338213644 |
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#21 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Sin City
Posts: 1,062
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i loved the soybean yogurt pizza
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#22 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Montreal!
Posts: 6,285
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#23 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: 1123,6536,5231
Posts: 3,397
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Ollllld
But still funny |
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#24 | |
UNSTOPPABLE
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: UK :: ICQ# 156068
Posts: 11,569
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Quote:
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#25 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Your Mother's Snatch!
Posts: 1,874
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LMAO
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#26 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 7,952
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haha
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