friend/employee - bad idea? - GoFuckYourself.com

quiet · 02-23-2004, 09:31 PM

i've been doing this for some time, and damn does it have it's headaches.

Fletch XXX · 02-23-2004, 09:32 PM

fuck you man, i quit, im tired of your shit.

find someone new to abuse you self righteous bizatch

Sly_RJ · 02-23-2004, 09:32 PM

I'm starting it tonight. Don't tell me that!

Actually, I expect it. Oh well.

chowda · 02-23-2004, 09:32 PM

question is: what came first?

cold_ice · 02-23-2004, 09:33 PM

I make it a point not to get to friendly with my coworkers.

leonards · 02-23-2004, 09:33 PM

bad mix if you ask me

MrIzzz · 02-23-2004, 09:33 PM

friends or family never mix too good in biz. unless you subcontract each other

cold_ice · 02-23-2004, 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by chowda
question is: what came first?

$5 submissions · 02-23-2004, 09:34 PM

IMHO, sure fire way to kill a friendship.

SureFire · 02-23-2004, 09:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MrIzzz
friends or family never mix too good in biz. unless you subcontract each other

My thoughts also.

quiet · 02-23-2004, 09:36 PM

biz first, friendship later.

no threat to the biz (not even close), just a serious headache from time to time.

Spunky · 02-23-2004, 09:37 PM

Ok ..1 bowl of rice a day and thats it..I have to eat..

chowda · 02-23-2004, 09:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet
biz first, friendship later.

no threat to the biz (not even close), just a serious headache from time to time.

to quote a popular theme song

u take the good
u take the bad
u take them both and there u have
the facts of life.

TheJimmy · 02-23-2004, 09:37 PM

depends on the quality of the individual...

if they are a go-getting motivated WITH IT person...yes, if not...why risk the friendship if there is any doubt of them being able to live up to your expectations or requirements?

do they have the ability to seperate work relationships and famliar/personal ones?

Fletch XXX · 02-23-2004, 09:41 PM

ive decided against this (employing freinds) every time i have considered it.

Loki · 02-23-2004, 09:42 PM

well in my mainstream work hiring friends was a horible idea, so far with the adult biz it has worked out a bit diff, but too many times i have seen in various places, Friend/employee does not work at all, 9 times out of 10 it goes bad, due to the friend not fully respecting the "boss" during biz hours, and alot of ppl IMHO have a hard time seperating the work/offwork roles.

-Loki-

Ian · 02-23-2004, 09:43 PM

Been there, done that. Never works. 'Nuff said.

Rorschach · 02-23-2004, 09:43 PM

"Seven: this rule is so underrated
Keep your family and business completely seperated
Money and blood don't mix like two dicks and no bitch
Find yourself in serious shit"

BradM · 02-23-2004, 09:43 PM

It doesn't work.
They think there is some special bond.
Once they start to bitch.. it ruins a friendship.

The Truth Hurts · 02-23-2004, 09:44 PM

been there, done that, didn't work.

AWW - Kevin · 02-23-2004, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet
i've been doing this for some time, and damn does it have it's headaches.

When you have a business and make money this will always happen, you try and help your friends best you can.
Sometimes it works out well sometimes it doesn't
That's Life

sometimes happens the other way around you have an employee that you become best friends with, give and take like in any relationship be it buisness or other as long as they realise YOU
are the boss !

psyko514 · 02-23-2004, 09:45 PM

now what about family and employee?

Peaches · 02-23-2004, 09:45 PM

I've become friends with people I work with but I've never hired or worked for anyone who was a friend or family member before the work relationship. I've seen money destroy too many relationships, especially when there's a lot of it.

quiet · 02-23-2004, 09:45 PM

has worked out well for me over the years. there are issues, but so far none insurmountable.

Oracle Porn · 02-23-2004, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by psyko514
now what about family and employee?

easier to kill yourself. faster too.

quiet · 02-23-2004, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet
biz first, friendship later.

no threat to the biz (not even close), just a serious headache from time to time.

please read again.

Fletch XXX · 02-23-2004, 09:55 PM

im glad my friends are lazy punk rockers who dont want to work anyway...

hahah

quiet · 02-23-2004, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX
im glad my friends are lazy punk rockers who dont want to work anyway...

hahah

don't assume all or none.

Kimmykim · 02-23-2004, 10:01 PM

Not unless you want your friendship and your business to suffer.

Fletch XXX · 02-23-2004, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet

don't assume all or none.

youre right.

actually few of my friends are lazy, they just aint cut out for this industry.

my three closest friends, one is a recording studio engineer, the other a music instructor (digital music genius) - these guys need to be in a room surrounded by mics and computers, the last a videographer, who designs and edits DVD menus and digital video on avid... they know nothing about anything except music and recording.

heh ;)

cheers man.

SomeCreep · 02-23-2004, 10:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet
i've been doing this for some time, and damn does it have it's headaches.

very bad idea, if you ever have to fire him for being unsatisfactory/incompetent, he will take it personally and your friendship will become alienated.

Ambergirl · 02-23-2004, 10:31 PM

It's a fine line...but I work with my friends.

bhutocracy · 02-23-2004, 10:36 PM

not entirely a bad idea.. especially long distance.

toddler · 02-23-2004, 10:38 PM

I've done this off and on for years. only really killed one friendship: had a guy working for me a one company, i left, got him a job at the next. and his gf. They both worked for me. We hung out a lot, went to the bars every thurs and sat for a year or so. Then I had to fire his gf because she wouldn't do shit. Just sat around in our beanbag room bullshitting with our eng staff.

Yeah, that was a bad day. 2 people let go in a 30m period. One for not doing shit, one for just being an all around fucktard.

I still talk to my friend occasionally. But its not a 'comfortable' thing.

On the other hand, the rest are great. People who respect you work well for you. People who fear you also tend to harbor ill feelings toward you.

DeanCapture · 02-23-2004, 10:38 PM

It's ok until you have to jump their ass about something - then it brings bad feelings. I've made the mistake of being *friends* with bosses in the past - it has always come back to haunt me.

You should keep your distance and your employees should as well.

Tylo · 02-23-2004, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by quiet
i've been doing this for some time, and damn does it have it's headaches.

We just let a good friend go today.. It was kinda hard but he left on good terms.. A headake for sure non the less..

Fletch XXX · 02-23-2004, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeanCapture
It's ok until you have to jump their ass about something - then it brings bad feelings. I've made the mistake of being *friends* with bosses in the past - it has always come back to haunt me.

You should keep your distance and your employees should as well.

friends with the boss?

you dirty traitor.

fuck the boss, ALWAYS.

DeanCapture · 02-23-2004, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX

friends with the boss?

you dirty traitor.

fuck the boss, ALWAYS.

Ironhorse · 02-23-2004, 10:55 PM

Business and friendship = boiling water

Intrigue · 02-24-2004, 01:09 PM

Depends on the people involved, as long as everyone realises that business is business, and business relationships should not effect friendships, and vise versa. I'm friends with alot of my clients, but i don't take advantage of the fact, and neither do they.

In short, it can work out, but for most it usually doesn't.

Doc911 · 02-24-2004, 01:22 PM

Its never a good idea to be writing a paycheck for your friends or family. it just doesn't work in the long run. At least it hasn't for me

Shoplifter · 02-24-2004, 01:28 PM

Lost a few friends like this. One fellow decided to clone my sites on my own servers, and the other just became resentful of my success.

No friends or family.

rounders · 02-24-2004, 01:28 PM

yeah bad stuff!

HS-Trixxxia · 02-24-2004, 01:38 PM

Depending on the individuals and what they expect from the work/friendship equation. I've had people working for me that we all became relatively close friends. They knew my limits - sick days, slacking off - when there was overtime though, they all volunteered (same pay) - when the company needed us to work until 4 am...they were all there. Whatever was put on my shoulders, they would be there to take some of the weight off for me too. I can't complain. I could have counted on them - and they knew they could have counted on me. It was a give and take.

If your employer/employee friendship is bringing expectations from the employee that weren't there beforehand, then it's not a good idea to let the friendship grow. If the person is just as productive, doesn't expect preferential treatment and respects the same rules as everyone else, I don't see a problem with it. The other thing to take into consideration is that we do tend to spend most of our time with our co-workers, so it's inevitable that friendships grow at the workplace - when it changes the attitudes of the people involved towards their work and responsabilities, then it may create a problem.

Herb Kornfield · 02-24-2004, 02:03 PM

Ive worked for friends and employed friends...

I can seperate the work relationship from the freindship part and have in the past when I worked for friends. I am more willing to go the extra mile to help out people since their success is relative to my success.

At the end of the day, they are disrespecting your friendship overall and thats not cool if you have been right by them.

It all comes down to how much shit do you want to take? is this person a nightmare in some respects, yet really happening and on the ball in others?

Can they improve and or want to change?

Have a chat with them, if no change, then explore your options. each person out there is unique and brings different pluses and minuses to your table. Whats the best for YOU?

Ross · 02-24-2004, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX

youre right.

actually few of my friends are lazy, they just aint cut out for this industry.

my three closest friends, one is a recording studio engineer, the other a music instructor (digital music genius) - these guys need to be in a room surrounded by mics and computers, the last a videographer, who designs and edits DVD menus and digital video on avid... they know nothing about anything except music and recording.

heh ;)

cheers man.

You have some talented friends

SNIPER · 02-24-2004, 02:33 PM

Bad idea...always a bad idea.
Friends and business are always the worst mix. If they are friends when they start out they won't be when you finish.

Basic_man · 02-24-2004, 02:35 PM

indeed, only very few relationships have what it takes to get through such a "situation"

myjah · 02-24-2004, 04:20 PM

can be very difficult...its usually not best for the relationship

Doctor Dre · 02-24-2004, 04:21 PM

I dunno it's not really a problem if you put your limit clear

02-23-2004, 09:31 PM	#1
quiet we'll miss you our friend. RIP Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Fernie, BC Posts: 25,115	friend/employee - bad idea? i've been doing this for some time, and damn does it have it's headaches. __________________ we'll miss you our friend. RIP

02-23-2004, 09:32 PM	#2
Fletch XXX GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: that 504 Posts: 60,840	fuck you man, i quit, im tired of your shit. find someone new to abuse you self righteous bizatch __________________ Want an Android App for your tube, membership, or free site? Need banners or promo material? Hit us up (ICQ Fletch: 148841377) or email me fletchxxx at gmail.com - recent work - About me

02-23-2004, 09:32 PM	#3
Sly_RJ Live Hard - Die Hard Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Ready to leave... Posts: 17,042	I'm starting it tonight. Don't tell me that! Actually, I expect it. Oh well. __________________ PHAT SERVERS - Quality dedicated hosting at a quality price! sly AT phatservers DOT com - 147479144

02-23-2004, 09:32 PM	#4
chowda Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Gooch city Posts: 9,527	question is: what came first? __________________ Someone finds you... 2007 PS: Nationalnet is the best host I've ever had. And i tried alot of them.

02-23-2004, 09:33 PM	#7
MrIzzz If u touch it, I will cum Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: long island Posts: 22,923	friends or family never mix too good in biz. unless you subcontract each other __________________ WHO WANTS TO PLAY GRAB-ASS?

02-23-2004, 09:33 PM	#5
cold_ice Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: cali Posts: 3,027	I make it a point not to get to friendly with my coworkers.

02-23-2004, 09:33 PM	#6
leonards Registered User Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 27	bad mix if you ask me

02-23-2004, 09:34 PM	#9
$5 submissions I help you SUCCEED Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Pearl of the Orient Seas Posts: 32,195	IMHO, sure fire way to kill a friendship. __________________ Need a NON-ADULT income stream? We build your YOUTUBE CHANNEL for only $20 per video! For Hire: $3/hour or $400 per month Marketing Specialist Virtual Assistants

02-23-2004, 09:36 PM	#11
quiet we'll miss you our friend. RIP Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Fernie, BC Posts: 25,115	biz first, friendship later. no threat to the biz (not even close), just a serious headache from time to time. __________________ we'll miss you our friend. RIP

02-23-2004, 09:37 PM	#12
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,947	Ok ..1 bowl of rice a day and thats it..I have to eat.. __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

02-23-2004, 09:37 PM	#14
TheJimmy ICQ- five seven 0 2 5 5 0 Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 10,747	depends on the quality of the individual... if they are a go-getting motivated WITH IT person...yes, if not...why risk the friendship if there is any doubt of them being able to live up to your expectations or requirements? do they have the ability to seperate work relationships and famliar/personal ones? __________________ Investor with 5m - 15m USD to invest. Do you have a site or network of sites earning 50k - 200k a month income? Email your contact and preliminary data to: domain.cashventures (at) gmail.com....Please...no tire kickers...serious offers and inquiries only.

02-23-2004, 09:41 PM	#15
Fletch XXX GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: that 504 Posts: 60,840	ive decided against this (employing freinds) every time i have considered it. __________________ Want an Android App for your tube, membership, or free site? Need banners or promo material? Hit us up (ICQ Fletch: 148841377) or email me fletchxxx at gmail.com - recent work - About me

02-23-2004, 09:42 PM	#16
Loki Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Michigan Posts: 4,420	well in my mainstream work hiring friends was a horible idea, so far with the adult biz it has worked out a bit diff, but too many times i have seen in various places, Friend/employee does not work at all, 9 times out of 10 it goes bad, due to the friend not fully respecting the "boss" during biz hours, and alot of ppl IMHO have a hard time seperating the work/offwork roles. -Loki- __________________ MAKE MONEY WITH 3D TOONS! Need hosting? LokiCa$h Uses Amerinoc and love them! Skype: LokiPorn Or Email 3dloki\|at\|gmail.com

02-23-2004, 09:43 PM	#17
Ian Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 1,259	Been there, done that. Never works. 'Nuff said.

02-23-2004, 09:43 PM	#18
Rorschach So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 5,579	"Seven: this rule is so underrated Keep your family and business completely seperated Money and blood don't mix like two dicks and no bitch Find yourself in serious shit"

02-23-2004, 09:43 PM	#19
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	It doesn't work. They think there is some special bond. Once they start to bitch.. it ruins a friendship.

02-23-2004, 09:44 PM	#20
The Truth Hurts Zph7YXfjMhg Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: In Your Skull Posts: 15,345	been there, done that, didn't work.

02-23-2004, 09:45 PM	#22
psyko514 See sig. Join Epic Cash. Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Montreal, Quebec. ICQ: 214702014 Posts: 22,366	now what about family and employee? __________________ Bad Girl Bucks - 50% Revshare through CCBill. Promote BrandyDDD, Pixie's Pillows, Action Allie and more! Phoenix Forum Pics \| Webmaster Access Montreal pics email: psyko514(a)gmail.com \| icq: 214-702-014

02-23-2004, 09:45 PM	#23
Peaches Old broad Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Away Posts: 13,933	I've become friends with people I work with but I've never hired or worked for anyone who was a friend or family member before the work relationship. I've seen money destroy too many relationships, especially when there's a lot of it.

02-23-2004, 09:55 PM	#27
Fletch XXX GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: that 504 Posts: 60,840	im glad my friends are lazy punk rockers who dont want to work anyway... hahah __________________ Want an Android App for your tube, membership, or free site? Need banners or promo material? Hit us up (ICQ Fletch: 148841377) or email me fletchxxx at gmail.com - recent work - About me

02-23-2004, 10:01 PM	#29
Kimmykim bitchslapping zebras!!!!! Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: In a shack by the beach Posts: 16,015	Not unless you want your friendship and your business to suffer.

02-23-2004, 10:31 PM	#32
Ambergirl Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: East Coast Baby Posts: 1,269	It's a fine line...but I work with my friends. __________________ Adult Business Consultant since 1995

02-23-2004, 10:36 PM	#33
bhutocracy Not making A Comeback Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 10,218	not entirely a bad idea.. especially long distance.

02-23-2004, 10:38 PM	#34
toddler Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: austin, tx Posts: 1,911	I've done this off and on for years. only really killed one friendship: had a guy working for me a one company, i left, got him a job at the next. and his gf. They both worked for me. We hung out a lot, went to the bars every thurs and sat for a year or so. Then I had to fire his gf because she wouldn't do shit. Just sat around in our beanbag room bullshitting with our eng staff. Yeah, that was a bad day. 2 people let go in a 30m period. One for not doing shit, one for just being an all around fucktard. I still talk to my friend occasionally. But its not a 'comfortable' thing. On the other hand, the rest are great. People who respect you work well for you. People who fear you also tend to harbor ill feelings toward you. __________________ http://www.flickr.com/photos/zoddler/

02-23-2004, 10:38 PM	#35
DeanCapture Haters & Trolls SUCK! Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 9,275	It's ok until you have to jump their ass about something - then it brings bad feelings. I've made the mistake of being friends with bosses in the past - it has always come back to haunt me. You should keep your distance and your employees should as well. __________________ Twitter: @DeanCapture Instagram: @TheDeanCapture DeanCapture "at" Gmail.com

02-23-2004, 10:55 PM	#39
Ironhorse Pixel Pusher Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,093	Business and friendship = boiling water __________________ [email protected]

02-24-2004, 01:09 PM	#40
Intrigue Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Ohio, US Posts: 662	Depends on the people involved, as long as everyone realises that business is business, and business relationships should not effect friendships, and vise versa. I'm friends with alot of my clients, but i don't take advantage of the fact, and neither do they. In short, it can work out, but for most it usually doesn't.

02-24-2004, 01:22 PM	#41
Doc911 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: If i was up your ass you'd know Posts: 3,695	Its never a good idea to be writing a paycheck for your friends or family. it just doesn't work in the long run. At least it hasn't for me __________________ For PHP/MySQL scripts ICQ 161480555 or email [email protected]

02-24-2004, 01:28 PM	#42
Shoplifter Richest man in Babylon Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Posts: 10,002 Posts: 5,732	Lost a few friends like this. One fellow decided to clone my sites on my own servers, and the other just became resentful of my success. No friends or family.

02-24-2004, 01:28 PM	#43
rounders Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: p0rn0stars & h0es Posts: 2,931	yeah bad stuff! __________________ ICQ#: 153923840

02-24-2004, 01:38 PM	#44
HS-Trixxxia Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Montreal Canada Posts: 2,946	Depending on the individuals and what they expect from the work/friendship equation. I've had people working for me that we all became relatively close friends. They knew my limits - sick days, slacking off - when there was overtime though, they all volunteered (same pay) - when the company needed us to work until 4 am...they were all there. Whatever was put on my shoulders, they would be there to take some of the weight off for me too. I can't complain. I could have counted on them - and they knew they could have counted on me. It was a give and take. If your employer/employee friendship is bringing expectations from the employee that weren't there beforehand, then it's not a good idea to let the friendship grow. If the person is just as productive, doesn't expect preferential treatment and respects the same rules as everyone else, I don't see a problem with it. The other thing to take into consideration is that we do tend to spend most of our time with our co-workers, so it's inevitable that friendships grow at the workplace - when it changes the attitudes of the people involved towards their work and responsabilities, then it may create a problem. __________________ ~~♥~~♥~~♥~~♥~~♥~~♥~~♥~~♥~~ Patrizia COO - ♥ MassiveDollars Email: patrizia at MassiveDollars dot com ICQ: 465.826.441 Yahoo: trixxxia_me MSN: trixxxia at hotmail dot com

02-24-2004, 02:03 PM	#45
Herb Kornfield Is on the 1 Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Philly Burbs Posts: 4,996	Ive worked for friends and employed friends... I can seperate the work relationship from the freindship part and have in the past when I worked for friends. I am more willing to go the extra mile to help out people since their success is relative to my success. At the end of the day, they are disrespecting your friendship overall and thats not cool if you have been right by them. It all comes down to how much shit do you want to take? is this person a nightmare in some respects, yet really happening and on the ball in others? Can they improve and or want to change? Have a chat with them, if no change, then explore your options. each person out there is unique and brings different pluses and minuses to your table. Whats the best for YOU?

02-24-2004, 02:33 PM	#47
SNIPER Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Wherever my laptop is. Posts: 410	Bad idea...always a bad idea. Friends and business are always the worst mix. If they are friends when they start out they won't be when you finish. __________________ Face Like and Angel, but Makes More Deals than the Devil }:-)

02-24-2004, 02:35 PM	#48
Basic_man Programming King Pin Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Montreal Posts: 27,360	indeed, only very few relationships have what it takes to get through such a "situation" __________________ UUGallery Builder - automated photo/video gallery plugin for Wordpress! Stop looking! Checkout Naked Hosting, online since 1999 !

02-24-2004, 04:20 PM	#49
myjah Back in the harbor Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 11,482	can be very difficult...its usually not best for the relationship __________________ VP of Marketing AVN Media Network Skype: AVNJill [email protected]