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-   -   Competition! MMS software from Mansion Productions - Price worth $3,995 ! ! ! (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=209478)

leedsfan 12-19-2003 01:33 PM

bump

trafficbuyer 12-19-2003 01:40 PM

Hindsight wins this easily, his text is f*cking awesome....he used his words great and you can see he researched their site...

thanks...

--mel

RogerV 12-19-2003 01:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicyjew
I am, like, totally GAY for MPA2.



http://www.hydrogenbomb.com/mpa2.jpg


LOL Now I'm pissed Paul you were suppose to dress up as a girl for my banner as one of the queens of the industry and now I see why you have been cheating on me and what you've been up to.

Oystein your one lucky guy to have a whore like Paul. what did you have to do for this besides give away such a sweet deal.

MPA2 and Paul deserve eachother:321GFY

juicyjew 12-19-2003 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tootie
:1orglaugh
I think he just called you a Facts of Life girl, and you laughed it off -- what a good sport! I almost feel bad about winning!

tootie 12-19-2003 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicyjew


I think he just called you a Facts of Life girl, and you laughed it off -- what a good sport! I almost feel bad about winning!

Uhhh... where do you think I got my nick from? :1orglaugh

PeerPatrick 12-19-2003 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Brujah
Check this out, you muthafuckas know what time it is
I don't even know why I'm even on this page
ya'll nigguz ain't even on my level
I'ma let my little homies ride on you
bitch made-ass wanna-be scripters -- deal with it!!

...in English please.

Ice 12-19-2003 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hindsight



Okay :thumbsup


Gettin credit from Chris - all the boys at Epoch
Eves drop on Netbilling or Bob from YNOT
Or why not ask Randy from A-M-C
And CCBill easily regards them as number one agency
Coz their shits more slammin than an NBA crew
You'll get members x2 with an MPA2
From Mansion Productions
There's mad script constructions
Slick intructions
Bringin' more fat pocket than storage for lipo suction
So fuck reductions
Hit em with dialers and cheques too
This text's true
Leave ya booking hotel rooms which have the best view
No whining, just wining and dining, fucking high flying
Watching cream pieing teens on Teenage Island
Or if its pricks with tits, bitches with no clits
They got chicks N Dicks so go promote it
And then there's dizzy hoes, in Anna Videos
60% recurring and thats unconditionals
And Oystein's the fucking man but now my times up
So I'm off to check my stats on their thirty dollar sign up...



Oh and btw, if there are any charity points on offer here I can fucking guarantee i need this shit as badly as Tootie.

We have a winner folks... this gets my vote :thumbsup

Brad Xtremepay 12-19-2003 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hindsight



Okay :thumbsup


Gettin credit from Chris - all the boys at Epoch
Eves drop on Netbilling or Bob from YNOT
Or why not ask Randy from A-M-C
And CCBill easily regards them as number one agency
Coz their shits more slammin than an NBA crew
You'll get members x2 with an MPA2
From Mansion Productions
There's mad script constructions
Slick intructions
Bringin' more fat pocket than storage for lipo suction
So fuck reductions
Hit em with dialers and cheques too
This text's true
Leave ya booking hotel rooms which have the best view
No whining, just wining and dining, fucking high flying
Watching cream pieing teens on Teenage Island
Or if its pricks with tits, bitches with no clits
They got chicks N Dicks so go promote it
And then there's dizzy hoes, in Anna Videos
60% recurring and thats unconditionals
And Oystein's the fucking man but now my times up
So I'm off to check my stats on their thirty dollar sign up...



Oh and btw, if there are any charity points on offer here I can fucking guarantee i need this shit as badly as Tootie.


The best - by far

juicyjew 12-19-2003 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RogerV



LOL Now I'm pissed Paul you were suppose to dress up as a girl for my banner as one of the queens of the industry and now I see why you have been cheating on me and what you've been up to.

Oystein your one lucky guy to have a whore like Paul. what did you have to do for this besides give away such a sweet deal.

MPA2 and Paul deserve eachother:321GFY

Roger, my camera disappeared when I was supposed to get those pics for you. I found the camera, and I've still got the miniskirt ready if you need a pic. Although, between your pics and this, people might begin to wonder about me.

Eh, fuck 'em.

juicyjew 12-19-2003 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tootie


Uhhh... where do you think I got my nick from? :1orglaugh

http://www.tootieandfrootie.com/

?

tootie 12-19-2003 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicyjew


http://www.tootieandfrootie.com/

?

Hmm.. nope!

I like Tootie Ramsey. She roller skates :)

I love the 80's! (Strikes Back)

Hindsight 12-19-2003 01:51 PM

*nervously waiting*

Man I need this MMS shit soooooo fucking badly.... just wish some of the peeps above were the judges.. :glugglug

GrimShawn 12-19-2003 01:55 PM

hindsite is the best, that dude will be a legend one day!

PeerPatrick 12-19-2003 02:02 PM

I want the prize cause it's so grand.
One fish, two fish, in bush and hand.
Some said it's for shaving with it but that's just not true.
The mold on those folks brains must be furry and blue.
I like Oystein as a person, he's a fabulous intellectual.
The gay world would coo if he ever went homosexual.
Because Oystein is the man, unlike so much Industry rot.
And besides that, his wife is so F###ing hot.
We've "networked" till late, well into the night.
And when the pussy's passout we're up doing it right.
We drink and I smoke and we talk lots of shit.
BS or not the words are always legit.
Their truth rings clear like shiny silver bells.
I'm sure going to miss him when I'm relaxing in Hell.

So come one, come all and hail the man, you all can kiss his ass.
But I'm his bigggest fan.:thumbsup

SiMpLe 12-19-2003 02:16 PM

and the winner is.................?

sweetums 12-19-2003 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicyjew
I am, like, totally GAY for MPA2.

It?s true. When I say I?m gay for MPA2, I don?t mean it in the usual oh-dude-I?m-so-overly-excited-about-this-random-thing-that-I-must-gesticulate-flamboyantly sense of the word; no, I mean if MPA2 had a penis, I would forgo a lifetime of ardent heterosexuality and allow said penis to stir my backdoor brownie mix.

I recall my first meeting with MPA2, when Oystein introduced us in Vegas almost two years ago. We were both fairly new to the industry at the time ? a pair of fresh-faced, young innovators looking to shake up the Jizz Biz and leave our own distinctive, mushroom-shaped impressions on the collective cheek of the industry. MPA2 told me how it dreamt of being the world?s most popular sponsor automation package, with features like cascading processors, multiple programs, and even built-in anti-cheating systems ? at a price within anyone?s reach. I told it I had a dream once where my own boogers revolted against my face ? from the inside.

MPA2 listened patiently while I regaled it with tales of the brutal, snot-soaked coup d'etat, and even half-smirked when I used the phrase ?mutinous mucus?. At this point, I realized MPA2 and CJbucks were destined to walk the fields of adult website sponsor-dom together -- who am I to argue with kismet?

We began slowly. I moved MPA2 from LA and set it up in a swanky server at National Net. Not wanting to overburden the new software, I started with only a few sites and one revenue-sharing program on CJbucks, but MPA2?s capacity for heavy loads soon became apparent. It wasn?t satisfied with only a few hundred members ? it wanted MORE members, LONG-LASTING members; it wanted members buried DEEP within my vast network of sites. MPA2 put more strange, new members in my greasy hands than a Turkish bathhouse.

But my affair with MPA has also been a boon for the webmasters of CJbucks too. Because MPA2 takes the complexity out of managing a sponsor program, I have time to keep webmasters and publishers happy with new tools with which to generate revenue for themselves. It allows me to diddle my paysites constantly, so the webmasters can keep pumping out oodles of delicious sign-ups. I don?t use the term ?oodles? lightly. In fact, here in Atlanta, Georgia, I reckon a man would get the ever-loving shit kicked out of him for using that word, but I use it proudly -- that?s just how gay I am for MPA2.

Like any relationship though, ours was not without its problems. Functionalities needed customizing and specific components required integrating, but whenever the road got bumpy or MPA2 and I became frustrated with each other, Oystein set down his horned helmet and goblet of lamb?s blood to mend our troubled love. It?s strange, really, that a Norwegian Viking would find time between marauding and pillaging to provide topnotch customer service to his clients, but then, I would expect nothing less from Mansion Productions.

And, apparently, I?m not the only one who expects great things from them. I thought I was special, and, like a fool, I believed what MPA2 and CJbucks had together was unique. I was horribly wrong. It seems MPA2 has been providing the same quality automation services for dozens of other companies -- Tramp! Hussy!

I suppose we?ll have to keep working together on a professional level. I?ll swallow my pride, and take it like a man -- just not the same way as before.

Of course, I?ve heard MPA2?s cousin, MMS is, like, a total hottie. The following picture goes out to MMS ? I can?t wait to see how you manage my member area, big boy.


http://www.hydrogenbomb.com/mpa2.jpg


OK.....it's either the sleep deprivation of Paul's getting funnier and funnier! Hands down THE winner in my opinion....

I always knew you were gay :)


*hugs*

Just Mike 12-19-2003 02:50 PM

WOW... Guys, this is Oystein writing from Mike at Sexentertain's computer. I am at a meeting here with him.

This looks AMAZING and all I have to do now is to read over it all and pronounce a winner. This will all happen within the next 3 hours or so. Have to fight some LA traffic first....

SWEEET!!!!!!

I do have two favorites so far, that much I can say! :thumbsup

PS. Seriously - this is Oystein

HollywoodChris 12-19-2003 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicyjew
I am, like, totally GAY for MPA2.

It?s true. When I say I?m gay for MPA2, I don?t mean it in the usual oh-dude-I?m-so-overly-excited-about-this-random-thing-that-I-must-gesticulate-flamboyantly sense of the word; no, I mean if MPA2 had a penis, I would forgo a lifetime of ardent heterosexuality and allow said penis to stir my backdoor brownie mix.

I recall my first meeting with MPA2, when Oystein introduced us in Vegas almost two years ago. We were both fairly new to the industry at the time ? a pair of fresh-faced, young innovators looking to shake up the Jizz Biz and leave our own distinctive, mushroom-shaped impressions on the collective cheek of the industry. MPA2 told me how it dreamt of being the world?s most popular sponsor automation package, with features like cascading processors, multiple programs, and even built-in anti-cheating systems ? at a price within anyone?s reach. I told it I had a dream once where my own boogers revolted against my face ? from the inside.

MPA2 listened patiently while I regaled it with tales of the brutal, snot-soaked coup d'etat, and even half-smirked when I used the phrase ?mutinous mucus?. At this point, I realized MPA2 and CJbucks were destined to walk the fields of adult website sponsor-dom together -- who am I to argue with kismet?

We began slowly. I moved MPA2 from LA and set it up in a swanky server at National Net. Not wanting to overburden the new software, I started with only a few sites and one revenue-sharing program on CJbucks, but MPA2?s capacity for heavy loads soon became apparent. It wasn?t satisfied with only a few hundred members ? it wanted MORE members, LONG-LASTING members; it wanted members buried DEEP within my vast network of sites. MPA2 put more strange, new members in my greasy hands than a Turkish bathhouse.

But my affair with MPA has also been a boon for the webmasters of CJbucks too. Because MPA2 takes the complexity out of managing a sponsor program, I have time to keep webmasters and publishers happy with new tools with which to generate revenue for themselves. It allows me to diddle my paysites constantly, so the webmasters can keep pumping out oodles of delicious sign-ups. I don?t use the term ?oodles? lightly. In fact, here in Atlanta, Georgia, I reckon a man would get the ever-loving shit kicked out of him for using that word, but I use it proudly -- that?s just how gay I am for MPA2.

Like any relationship though, ours was not without its problems. Functionalities needed customizing and specific components required integrating, but whenever the road got bumpy or MPA2 and I became frustrated with each other, Oystein set down his horned helmet and goblet of lamb?s blood to mend our troubled love. It?s strange, really, that a Norwegian Viking would find time between marauding and pillaging to provide topnotch customer service to his clients, but then, I would expect nothing less from Mansion Productions.

And, apparently, I?m not the only one who expects great things from them. I thought I was special, and, like a fool, I believed what MPA2 and CJbucks had together was unique. I was horribly wrong. It seems MPA2 has been providing the same quality automation services for dozens of other companies -- Tramp! Hussy!

I suppose we?ll have to keep working together on a professional level. I?ll swallow my pride, and take it like a man -- just not the same way as before.

Of course, I?ve heard MPA2?s cousin, MMS is, like, a total hottie. The following picture goes out to MMS ? I can?t wait to see how you manage my member area, big boy.


http://www.hydrogenbomb.com/mpa2.jpg



I must say...
Goddamn brutha... You Deep!...
Let me know what you think about the system... haha!

- AFN - 12-19-2003 03:15 PM

This is THE ABSOLUTE WINNER -- hits the major objectives of Mansion productions -- describes the product clearly, describes the potential benefits, SELLS without hype.

Winner!


Quote:

Originally posted by Hindsight



Okay :thumbsup


Gettin credit from Chris - all the boys at Epoch
Eves drop on Netbilling or Bob from YNOT
Or why not ask Randy from A-M-C
And CCBill easily regards them as number one agency
Coz their shits more slammin than an NBA crew
You'll get members x2 with an MPA2
From Mansion Productions
There's mad script constructions
Slick intructions
Bringin' more fat pocket than storage for lipo suction
So fuck reductions
Hit em with dialers and cheques too
This text's true
Leave ya booking hotel rooms which have the best view
No whining, just wining and dining, fucking high flying
Watching cream pieing teens on Teenage Island
Or if its pricks with tits, bitches with no clits
They got chicks N Dicks so go promote it
And then there's dizzy hoes, in Anna Videos
60% recurring and thats unconditionals
And Oystein's the fucking man but now my times up
So I'm off to check my stats on their thirty dollar sign up...



Oh and btw, if there are any charity points on offer here I can fucking guarantee i need this shit as badly as Tootie.


Tala 12-19-2003 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tootie
MPA2 is the sexiest affiliate software on the planet. I want to lay down in a feather bed with it, surrounded by the soft, golden glow of candle light and make sweet love to it all night long. I want to shower MPA2 with kisses so tender and so gentle that MPA2 will think it's being kissed by the ruby red lips of God's very own angels. I want to marry MPA2 and have it's children and live together in peace and harmony for the rest of our natural lives and for all eternity. MPA2 is the unequivocal, undeniable, unmistakable leader in affiliate software and I promise to love, honor and cherish it for as long as we both shall live. I do.

:)

There is absolutely nothing comparable to this. Give tootie the prize.

dammit, now I wanna go get laid. :(

jimthefiend 12-19-2003 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hindsight



Okay :thumbsup


Gettin credit from Chris - all the boys at Epoch
Eves drop on Netbilling or Bob from YNOT
Or why not ask Randy from A-M-C
And CCBill easily regards them as number one agency
Coz their shits more slammin than an NBA crew
You'll get members x2 with an MPA2
From Mansion Productions
There's mad script constructions
Slick intructions
Bringin' more fat pocket than storage for lipo suction
So fuck reductions
Hit em with dialers and cheques too
This text's true
Leave ya booking hotel rooms which have the best view
No whining, just wining and dining, fucking high flying
Watching cream pieing teens on Teenage Island
Or if its pricks with tits, bitches with no clits
They got chicks N Dicks so go promote it
And then there's dizzy hoes, in Anna Videos
60% recurring and thats unconditionals
And Oystein's the fucking man but now my times up
So I'm off to check my stats on their thirty dollar sign up...



Oh and btw, if there are any charity points on offer here I can fucking guarantee i need this shit as badly as Tootie.


:thumbsup :thumbsup

tootie 12-19-2003 03:50 PM

I've got to head out for a little while, I'll be back later.

Lots of luck, everyone! There have been some fantastic posts! :thumbsup

OY 12-19-2003 03:57 PM

OK. Just got back from fighting LA traffic on a Friday afternoon.

Time to announce a winner!!!





































Just need to read it all over again, and let Garry have ONE word in, then this is a wrap!

1/2 hour or so max...

Keep checking this thread, partytime is about to start for one smart GFYer!!!

:warning

:thumbsup

amacontent 12-19-2003 04:07 PM

Hindsight is the clear winner here, not only is his text descriptive but the way he plays with the words is fucking great.. my vote would definatelygo to Hindsight"

maxjohan 12-19-2003 04:12 PM

It's the final countdown... da da da ..

Of course I didn't mean poison brotha..now can I get the prize plz?

:glugglug

SinisterStudios 12-19-2003 04:27 PM

We did the demo of MMS and i have to say we were very impressed, MMS looks as sweet as Jenna Jamesons pussy must taste, Id give my first born for either, but unforntunetly i cant afford either :( I dont know you guys but hopefully get to meet in Vegas. All i can say is you guys are the shit for making such a great proggie.It is the best i have seen so far on the market, and the sexy voice you have narrating the demo could sell me ice in alaska.
http://www.sinisterstudios.com/logosmall.jpg Sinister Studios
Quote:

"Thinking is the hardest work there is, that's why so FEW people engage in it." Henry Ford

OY 12-19-2003 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oystein
Competition! MMS software from Mansion Productions - Price worth $3,995 ! ! ! (Lensman approved)

This is a very stupid competition with a very serious price!

MMS - Member Management System from the creators of MPA2!

To win you will have to be the one person/company that says the best, sexiest, loveliest thing about one of the following:

1. Mansion Productions

2. Any of our products:
MMS , MPA2 , HostMansion , MoneyMansion , DesignMansion , or maybe ContentMansion .

3. Oystein

4. Garry

You say the best thing, you win the price!!!

Competition is officially over in exactly 3 days from start.

PS. I am judge and executioner (no matter what Garry will try to say, so a hint is to praise me more than anything....)

Have at it and may the smartest GFY'er win!

:thumbsup and of course, in the spirit of GFY :321GFY





So here we are, at the end of a totally funny competition with a very serious price!!!

And the verdict is as follows (you are allowed to post your comments about the verdict... )


It was a very very very tight fight for first place. The three top contenders narrowed down to:

TOOTIE, JUICYJEW and HINDSIGHT!



















:warning


Now who will it be?????

More to follow... in 2 minutes...

Hindsight 12-19-2003 05:17 PM

for fucks sake man!!

LMAO

ATL_Ryan 12-19-2003 05:29 PM

It's been more than 2 minutes. I'm sure the Juicy Jew will win though. :thumbsup

Bambi911xx 12-19-2003 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CJ_Ryan
It's been more than 2 minutes. I'm sure the Juicy Jew will win though. :thumbsup
I agree there !!

garry 12-19-2003 05:35 PM

Everyone !

While Oystein is writing the final message about who is the lucky winner I just wanted to thank everyone that have posted their sincerely thoughts about us and Mansion Productions services. And what even amazed me the most was that everyone said only true things about us and our products ;)

But seriously. Some of these posts made my eye wet. You guys are good !! All of you ! So from the bottom of my hart, thanks a million. I just wish I could afford to give you all a free version of the MMMS system.

See you all in Vegas. Stop buy our booth ( BOOTH #123 ) and check out my bad Norwegian accent !!!

Bambi911xx 12-19-2003 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by garry
So from the bottom of my hart, thanks a million.
What's a hart? :)

(giggles)

garry 12-19-2003 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Bambi911xx


What's a hart? :)

(giggles)

heheeh I told you about my accent :) Heart then,, now happy ? :winkwink:

Ice 12-19-2003 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by garry
Everyone !

While Oystein is writing the final message about who is the lucky winner

Holy fuck.... how long does it take to write...

And the winner is________:)

Tala 12-19-2003 05:46 PM

Come on! Give three away, one to each! Or give the big one away and two smaller prizes. It's the Holiday Season. :)

Brujah 12-19-2003 05:46 PM

The winner is:
Brujah!

Thank you thank you. I'd like to thank 2pac for providing the inspiration for a script battle. I'd like to thank all the other management script authors for being such good sports about it.

Oh, and THANKS TO ALL THE FANS in the nosebleed section!

SiMpLe 12-19-2003 05:46 PM

TOOTIE, JUICYJEW and HINDSIGHT!


DAMN IT! :(

Good luck guys!

OY 12-19-2003 05:46 PM

The winner of this MMMS (Mansion Member Management System) competition is................................................ .....

JUICYJEW!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR BRAND NEW AND FREE MMMS!!!

Your writing is beyond spectacular and we felt very very flattered about everything you had to say. And the picture you included gave us tears in our eyes... :thumbsup





But wait, there is more!!!!



























We want to give something out to the runner up in the competition too. You were SOOOOO CLOSE, but since we only could have one winner?.

HINDSIGHT ? If you want it, of course, we will give you $3,000 off your purchase of MMMS. So instead of $3,995 ? YOU will only be charged $1K. It is up to you, but we think that is a pretty good deal.




And then there is Tootie??..














What to do, what to do???..




















TOOTIE ? How would you like a FREE COPY of MPA2 RENT VERSION!?!?!?! (only have to cover the monthly rent fees?.)

YOU DESERVE IT!!! And not to mention, it is XMAS!

I loooove being SANTA - - - Ho ho ho!!!


MERRY XMAS EVERYONE!


:GFYBand

SiMpLe 12-19-2003 05:48 PM

Nice spread Oy! (I mean Santa Oy) :thumbsup

Bambi911xx 12-19-2003 05:54 PM

http://photo.starblvd.net/~bambi/2-3-1.jpg


Thanks for then fun!

Bambi911xx 12-19-2003 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by garry


heheeh I told you about my accent :) Heart then,, now happy ? :winkwink:

Oh heart! Yeah I have one of those to! ;-)

Always happy thanks!

Hindsight 12-19-2003 05:58 PM

Doh!

:(

Congrats JuicyJew.


Yeah erm.. thanks for the offer of the discount but fuck my pride I'll tell you straight I don't have a spare $1k right now..

:(



Dunno, maybe if you could postpone this offer, that'd be ace... if not.. tough shit for me I guess.

ATL_Ryan 12-19-2003 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CJ_Ryan
It's been more than 2 minutes. I'm sure the Juicy Jew will win though. :thumbsup

Can I say....I told you so!

BrentD 12-19-2003 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oystein
TOOTIE ? How would you like a FREE COPY of MPA2 RENT VERSION!?!?!?! (only have to cover the monthly rent fees?.)

YOU DESERVE IT!!! And not to mention, it is XMAS


:GFYBand [/B]

Congrats Tootie, thanks Oystein for including the top 3 with prizes, great contest btw


:thumbsup

Bambi911xx 12-19-2003 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CJ_Ryan



Can I say....I told you so!

http://www.hydrogenbomb.com/mpa2.jpg

Yeah that was priceless! ;-)

Tala 12-19-2003 06:02 PM

Congrats everyone!! :)

OY 12-19-2003 06:10 PM

I also want to thank Lensman for letting us have this insanely stupid, but fun, competition on his board.

Thanks Lens!

:thumbsup

Hindsight 12-19-2003 06:21 PM

Just wanna thank Oystein for confirming I can postpone this offer until whenever.

WOOT WOOT I'm happy now :glugglug

Fucking Christmas and bad judgement has crippled me recently. But fuck it I'm happy with a $3k discount fuck yeah I am!

SomeCreep 12-19-2003 06:22 PM

200 kind words :glugglug

OY 12-19-2003 07:12 PM

http://www.hydrogenbomb.com/mpa2.jpg

What the heck could I say to this one???

Nothing........

:uhoh


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