Adopt A Newbie Program - GoFuckYourself.com

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 02:48 PM

Yo

I can adopt 2 newbies at the moment and help you with any questions you might have.

If you meet any of the Requirements below you may apply

Make below 5 dollars per day on your sites

Your just plain stupid

You have no clue about anything

Your still flying a swoit banner in your sig

Please post why you should be adopted below

Sly_RJ · 07-30-2003, 02:50 PM

I qualify for all of the above. Can you help me out?

cezam · 07-30-2003, 02:52 PM

i qualify for all the above except the swoit banner. may i be your adoptive son now?

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sly_RJ
I qualify for all of the above. Can you help me out?

Hmmmm i heard you get laid alot . I dont think you need any help yo.

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 02:53 PM

You gotta put a good reason such as:

I have no money for food and have been eating cheetos for the last 2 weeks

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 02:53 PM

Me 2...!!!

I am a super tech nerd and I can get great CTRs and pretty good conversions, but I can't seem to build any decent traffic...

HELP ME OBE WAN KE JUICY! YOU'RE MY ONLY HOPE!

gornyhuy at pornsneak.com

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 02:54 PM

Ummmmm....
If I don't quit my day job I'm going to walk from cubical to cubical with a high powered rifle slewing round after round of hot lead.

Hows that?

cezam · 07-30-2003, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicylinks
You gotta put a good reason such as:

I have no money for food and have been eating cheetos for the last 2 weeks

i voted for you in that 'who do you think is smartest on GFY' poll! now that is a reason

smut monger · 07-30-2003, 02:58 PM

I'm making 5 figures, I want to make 6. What 'bout this?

kisskatlyn · 07-30-2003, 03:02 PM

my reason:

I'm cute ;)

I never had a swoit banner and I'm not stupid though so maybe I don't meet the requirements lol

Gutterboy · 07-30-2003, 03:03 PM

I want to learn how to manicure my eyebrows like a true guido

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kisskatlyn
my reason:

I'm cute ;)

I never had a swoit banner and I'm not stupid though so maybe I don't meet the requirements lol

Pics?

kisskatlyn · 07-30-2003, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicylinks

Pics?

available at: http://laetitiacasta.isnude.com/

only in my dreams of course lol

Haphazard · 07-30-2003, 03:21 PM

Ok, of the listed requirements...I can honestly say that I qualify for 2 of them.

I make less than $5 a day (cause I haven't done anything yet...very methodical).

And I can probably say that I have no clue about anything (I've been researching my ass off...I think I have a handle on how to go about things and succeed). But, I'm sure that when I actually dive in and get down to business...I will find out that I don't know jack squat!

But, the main qualification -- in my eyes -- is that I'm a fellow guido. What the fuck else do you need?

Ice · 07-30-2003, 03:35 PM

How about me JuicyBoy?

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 03:57 PM

how bout.... I slaved making the GFY Ticker for ages and hundreds of people on this board use it and I never got shit for it...

Thats how much I suck!

bringer · 07-30-2003, 04:00 PM

i have no food or money, i either commit crimes to get that prison dinner or eat out of the mcdonalds dumpster. f'n mcdonalds!
help me, two months, decent traffic, 0 dollars
HELP!

Plan9 · 07-30-2003, 04:01 PM

Im such a newbie, even swoit wouldn't have me.
Hows that?

kinetic · 07-30-2003, 04:31 PM

I think I should put myself up for adoption..

lagwagon · 07-30-2003, 04:36 PM

idle · 07-30-2003, 04:44 PM

well, I'm sure you can never have too many people asking for help. so I'll put mu hand up too.

I've been running my site for a month and do research every night, hang out on a few boards trying to learn things, but haven't managed to make a cent yet.

I am experimenting as my finances will allow, but my partner and I are struggling at the mo, so it's pretty tight. I've managed to buy some traffic off Choker once, and that produced a lot of traffic for 5 hours, and now things have quitened down again. my numbers are up from when I started, but most is thanks to some great trading partners. I'm still lucky if I get 200 uniques a day.

so basically, if you know about advertising and how to increase my incoming traffic for very little money, I'll be your friend too. :D

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 05:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by idle
how to increase my incoming traffic for very little money, I'll be your friend too. :D

Hey idle,
I just traded with ya! Send some traffic back my way....

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 05:20 PM

First adoption is

Gornyhuy

I got room for one more

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 05:39 PM

Weeeeeeeeee!

Can you spoon feed me Juicy? Pleeeeease?

I think my diaper is dirty.

SYNIKAL · 07-30-2003, 05:46 PM

wow I fit all of those & Im STILL flying the swoit banner =)

Plan9 · 07-30-2003, 05:49 PM

Ill have your baby...

Chris · 07-30-2003, 05:51 PM

Adopt me !

1) i make swoit money a day ( adverage 1.22$ a day ) .. sometimes i get a sale from submiting gallerys that dont convert.

2) Im still new

3) I post to much :-/

4) im fat , white , and broke.

kisskatlyn · 07-30-2003, 05:56 PM

I retract my bid...idle gets my vote...running for a month...200 uniques a day and still hasn't made any money at all...? Not sure what you're doing sweetie but I get about 100 uniques a day and I am making about $200/mo so far lol

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 06:05 PM

Ok I am mentoring gornyhuy now.

I will decide on the next adoption shortly

idle · 07-30-2003, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by gornyhuy

Hey idle,
I just traded with ya! Send some traffic back my way....

thanks dude

I've forced some hits your way over the next few hours, so hopefully, so people visit my site

idle · 07-30-2003, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kisskatlyn
I retract my bid...idle gets my vote...running for a month...200 uniques a day and still hasn't made any money at all...? Not sure what you're doing sweetie but I get about 100 uniques a day and I am making about $200/mo so far lol

I think the highest I've actually got without my traffic boost is 194.

I dunno. I have rearranged the page in the last week because I used to have a banner ad between each day's posts.

Now I put most of my banners down the side which a couple of friends have said looks better and less imposing.

The other thing I've done is add "Recommended" links down the left side of my page which takes surfers right to sponsors tours. this has increased the number of hits that are actually counted by the sponsors, but not enough to generate any sales yet.

Hopefully tonight I will go and add my page to a bunch of webmaster resources as allowing submits - up till a week ago I foolishly thought I get get enough material for life from hosted sponsor galleries...

so yeh..

still learning. still loving it

I even started a PHP tutorial and wrote myself a content randomising script which is what displays the "other" categories down the bottom of my page.

gornyhuy · 07-30-2003, 06:23 PM

Juicylinks is the fucking man.

Spent a long time answering my questions, looking at my shitty sites and galleries, giving me advice, the experienced scoop and massive homework assignments to get my shit together.

I'll bump this thread in a couple months and give you the before and after story when I'm big pimping guido style.

Thanks juicy!

Rorschach · 07-30-2003, 06:39 PM

idle... if you are hard up for cash and just starting out, the last thing I'd do would be to start a TGP.

idle · 07-30-2003, 06:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rorschach
idle... if you are hard up for cash and just starting out, the last thing I'd do would be to start a TGP.

ok, you can't make a statement like that without backing it up

I was going to start a paysite, but then was told by everyone to jump in and start a TGP to gain experience and money and to make mistakes that weren't going to be costly.

please - enlighten me.

Gutterboy · 07-30-2003, 06:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rorschach
idle... if you are hard up for cash and just starting out, the last thing I'd do would be to start a TGP.

Dunno about that. If you're just starting, you can learn alot running a TGP.

The school of hard knocks

Beats the fuck out of jumping in with a paysite and losing your shirt.

ibs · 07-30-2003, 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kisskatlyn
I get about 100 uniques a day and I am making about $200/mo so far lol

It must be because you are so frickin CUTE!

kisskatlyn · 07-30-2003, 07:06 PM

idle why don't you do some avs sites? You should be able to get some sales coming in that way. tgp's don't convert too great but if you own some of those sites that you are sending surfers to in your tgp maybe it will help...plus you can make money from sponsors by promoting them in avs sites. I'm by no means an expert but feel free to ask me questions and I can guide you to some tutorials where you can learn more

icq (219783) or yahoo (kisskatlyn)

kisskatlyn · 07-30-2003, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ibs

It must be because you are so frickin CUTE!

LOL no...this is just sponsor sales

idle · 07-30-2003, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kisskatlyn
idle why don't you do some avs sites? You should be able to get some sales coming in that way. tgp's don't convert too great but if you own some of those sites that you are sending surfers to in your tgp maybe it will help...plus you can make money from sponsors by promoting them in avs sites. I'm by no means an expert but feel free to ask me questions and I can guide you to some tutorials where you can learn more

thanks.

I had never considered an AVS site, probably because as a surfer, I was never really into them.

I have been thinking about building some galleries and trying to market those. But I'm starting to worry about having tied myself in too tight by restricting myself to large natural boobs on my TGP.

But I will look into the AVS thing..

chowda · 07-30-2003, 08:39 PM

me me me! u gotta take an azn guido. its the rules.. or else its discrimination!

Juicy D. Links · 07-30-2003, 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by idle

thanks.

I had never considered an AVS site, probably because as a surfer, I was never really into them.

I have been thinking about building some galleries and trying to market those. But I'm starting to worry about having tied myself in too tight by restricting myself to large natural boobs on my TGP.

But I will look into the AVS thing..

Diversify man

Mr.Teen · 07-30-2003, 08:43 PM

Me. I am a guido and I rock the swoit sig. I also need someone to tell me to get on track, I'm always getting side tracked

Rorschach · 07-30-2003, 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by idle
please - enlighten me.

IMO a TGP is a bad way to start because there is a steep learning curve in trading TGP traffic, managing and filtering the traffic, and selling the traffic. You also need a fair whack of traffic initially to prime your trades.

IMO you need to get into a daily routine of:
* build, mirror and submit one free site to as many link lists as you can;
* make an AVS doorway for every major AVS and submit them;
* build a niche gallery, mirror and submit to as many TGPs as possible - try to get partner accounts wherever you can;
* make 10 (or some other number) of SE content pages a day;
* spend the rest of the day either repeating steps above, or building FPAs/ filters/ tours/ surfer traps etc, or building traffic pumps, or working with paid traffic;
* research.

But you need to take care of your personal traffic first, and you need to learn how to sell effectively (it's not easy).

Greetings from rainy Auckland.

siccmade · 07-30-2003, 09:30 PM

MAY I RECOMMEND A NEWBIE

HES THE NUMBER ONE FUCK UP

LIL2BROKE4ME

PLEASE DO SOMETHING WITH THIS KID

LESSON ONE SHOULD BE ALL ABOUT GETTING THE FUCK AWAY FROM GFY

Rorschach · 07-30-2003, 09:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by siccmade
LESSON ONE SHOULD BE ALL ABOUT GETTING THE FUCK AWAY FROM GFY

Yep... less blabbing and more working.

danarchy · 07-30-2003, 09:36 PM

I suck can i do it......no motivation to

WendyB · 07-30-2003, 09:55 PM

The way the Adult industry is going, folks might entertain ADOPTING ONE OF THE ADULT INDUSTRY BIG BOYS and/or their processors

foe · 07-30-2003, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Haphazard
Ok, of the listed requirements...I can honestly say that I qualify for 2 of them.

I make less than $5 a day (cause I haven't done anything yet...very methodical).

And I can probably say that I have no clue about anything (I've been researching my ass off...I think I have a handle on how to go about things and succeed). But, I'm sure that when I actually dive in and get down to business...I will find out that I don't know jack squat!

But, the main qualification -- in my eyes -- is that I'm a fellow guido. What the fuck else do you need?

hmm can you do some deisgn?

bringer · 07-30-2003, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juicylinks
Yo

I can adopt 2 newbies at the moment and help you with any questions you might have.

If you meet any of the Requirements below you may apply

Make below 5 dollars per day on your sites

Your just plain stupid

You have no clue about anything

Your still flying a swoit banner in your sig

Please post why you should be adopted below

im all that and more. i cant get a signup, i THINK my setup is awesome... so im guessing im stupid and have no clue about anything. im poor and have bills.... women are expensive. i need help, help ME before im connecting with my dialup from my trailer.

idle · 07-31-2003, 02:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rorschach

IMO a TGP is a bad way to start because there is a steep learning curve in trading TGP traffic, managing and filtering the traffic, and selling the traffic. You also need a fair whack of traffic initially to prime your trades.

IMO you need to get into a daily routine of:
* build, mirror and submit one free site to as many link lists as you can;
* make an AVS doorway for every major AVS and submit them;
* build a niche gallery, mirror and submit to as many TGPs as possible - try to get partner accounts wherever you can;
* make 10 (or some other number) of SE content pages a day;
* spend the rest of the day either repeating steps above, or building FPAs/ filters/ tours/ surfer traps etc, or building traffic pumps, or working with paid traffic;
* research.

I don't have that much time. I still have a full time day job which unfortunately pays me well enough for me not to want to quit.

as it is, I'm getting by, chugging along. I plan on building some galleries to try and get my exposure up. and I will research AVS sites and what's needed for a few days and hopefully have something up next week. I've put some money on my credit card so I can afford another host+domain now

Quote:

But you need to take care of your personal traffic first, and you need to learn how to sell effectively (it's not easy).

yeh, being a certified geek, I'm not too good at the sales thing. I know that for a fact.

Quote:

Greetings from rainy Auckland.

haha.. it's sunnier here for a change!

07-30-2003, 02:48 PM	#1
Juicy D. Links So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- Posts: 122,992	Adopt A Newbie Program Yo I can adopt 2 newbies at the moment and help you with any questions you might have. If you meet any of the Requirements below you may apply Make below 5 dollars per day on your sites Your just plain stupid You have no clue about anything Your still flying a swoit banner in your sig Please post why you should be adopted below

07-30-2003, 02:50 PM	#2
Sly_RJ Live Hard - Die Hard Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Ready to leave... Posts: 17,042	I qualify for all of the above. Can you help me out? __________________ PHAT SERVERS - Quality dedicated hosting at a quality price! sly AT phatservers DOT com - 147479144

07-30-2003, 02:52 PM	#3
cezam Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: CZ, EU Posts: 1,363	i qualify for all the above except the swoit banner. may i be your adoptive son now? __________________

07-30-2003, 02:53 PM	#6
gornyhuy Chafed. Join Date: May 2002 Location: Face Down in Pussy Posts: 18,041	Me 2...!!! I am a super tech nerd and I can get great CTRs and pretty good conversions, but I can't seem to build any decent traffic... HELP ME OBE WAN KE JUICY! YOU'RE MY ONLY HOPE! gornyhuy at pornsneak.com __________________ icq:159548293

07-30-2003, 02:54 PM	#7
gornyhuy Chafed. Join Date: May 2002 Location: Face Down in Pussy Posts: 18,041	Ummmmm.... If I don't quit my day job I'm going to walk from cubical to cubical with a high powered rifle slewing round after round of hot lead. Hows that? __________________ icq:159548293

07-30-2003, 02:58 PM	#9
smut monger Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 211	I'm making 5 figures, I want to make 6. What 'bout this? __________________ PRO LIFE

07-30-2003, 03:02 PM	#10
kisskatlyn Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 433	my reason: I'm cute ;) I never had a swoit banner and I'm not stupid though so maybe I don't meet the requirements lol

07-30-2003, 03:03 PM	#11
Gutterboy So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Dis Posts: 4,751	I want to learn how to manicure my eyebrows like a true guido

07-30-2003, 03:21 PM	#14
Haphazard Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 119	Ok, of the listed requirements...I can honestly say that I qualify for 2 of them. I make less than $5 a day (cause I haven't done anything yet...very methodical). And I can probably say that I have no clue about anything (I've been researching my ass off...I think I have a handle on how to go about things and succeed). But, I'm sure that when I actually dive in and get down to business...I will find out that I don't know jack squat! But, the main qualification -- in my eyes -- is that I'm a fellow guido. What the fuck else do you need? __________________

07-30-2003, 03:35 PM	#15
Ice Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Sunny California Posts: 26,053	How about me JuicyBoy? __________________ icq 1904905

07-30-2003, 03:57 PM	#16
gornyhuy Chafed. Join Date: May 2002 Location: Face Down in Pussy Posts: 18,041	how bout.... I slaved making the GFY Ticker for ages and hundreds of people on this board use it and I never got shit for it... Thats how much I suck! __________________ icq:159548293

07-30-2003, 04:00 PM	#17
bringer i have man boobies Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: van down by the river Posts: 13,082	i have no food or money, i either commit crimes to get that prison dinner or eat out of the mcdonalds dumpster. f'n mcdonalds! help me, two months, decent traffic, 0 dollars HELP! __________________ 333-765-551

07-30-2003, 04:01 PM	#18
Plan9 Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,801	Im such a newbie, even swoit wouldn't have me. Hows that?

07-30-2003, 04:31 PM	#19
kinetic Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Loch Ness Posts: 397	I think I should put myself up for adoption..

07-30-2003, 04:36 PM	#20
lagwagon Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: az Posts: 8,464	__________________ FTVGirls - FTVMilfs - DanielleFTV

07-30-2003, 04:44 PM	#21
idle Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Wellington, NZ Posts: 100	well, I'm sure you can never have too many people asking for help. so I'll put mu hand up too. I've been running my site for a month and do research every night, hang out on a few boards trying to learn things, but haven't managed to make a cent yet. I am experimenting as my finances will allow, but my partner and I are struggling at the mo, so it's pretty tight. I've managed to buy some traffic off Choker once, and that produced a lot of traffic for 5 hours, and now things have quitened down again. my numbers are up from when I started, but most is thanks to some great trading partners. I'm still lucky if I get 200 uniques a day. so basically, if you know about advertising and how to increase my incoming traffic for very little money, I'll be your friend too. :D __________________ Cafe Hooters

07-30-2003, 05:20 PM	#23
Juicy D. Links So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- Posts: 122,992	First adoption is Gornyhuy I got room for one more

07-30-2003, 05:39 PM	#24
gornyhuy Chafed. Join Date: May 2002 Location: Face Down in Pussy Posts: 18,041	Weeeeeeeeee! Can you spoon feed me Juicy? Pleeeeease? I think my diaper is dirty. __________________ icq:159548293

07-30-2003, 05:46 PM	#25
SYNIKAL Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 1,795	wow I fit all of those & Im STILL flying the swoit banner =) __________________ ...........

07-30-2003, 05:49 PM	#26
Plan9 Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,801	Ill have your baby...

07-30-2003, 05:51 PM	#27
Chris Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Location: icq: 71462500 Skype: Jupzchris Posts: 27,880	Adopt me ! 1) i make swoit money a day ( adverage 1.22$ a day ) .. sometimes i get a sale from submiting gallerys that dont convert. 2) Im still new 3) I post to much :-/ 4) im fat , white , and broke. __________________ [email protected]

07-30-2003, 05:56 PM	#28
kisskatlyn Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 433	I retract my bid...idle gets my vote...running for a month...200 uniques a day and still hasn't made any money at all...? Not sure what you're doing sweetie but I get about 100 uniques a day and I am making about $200/mo so far lol

07-30-2003, 06:05 PM	#29
Juicy D. Links So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- Posts: 122,992	Ok I am mentoring gornyhuy now. I will decide on the next adoption shortly

07-30-2003, 06:23 PM	#32
gornyhuy Chafed. Join Date: May 2002 Location: Face Down in Pussy Posts: 18,041	Juicylinks is the fucking man. Spent a long time answering my questions, looking at my shitty sites and galleries, giving me advice, the experienced scoop and massive homework assignments to get my shit together. I'll bump this thread in a couple months and give you the before and after story when I'm big pimping guido style. Thanks juicy! __________________ icq:159548293

07-30-2003, 06:39 PM	#33
Rorschach So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 5,579	idle... if you are hard up for cash and just starting out, the last thing I'd do would be to start a TGP.

07-30-2003, 07:06 PM	#37
kisskatlyn Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 433	idle why don't you do some avs sites? You should be able to get some sales coming in that way. tgp's don't convert too great but if you own some of those sites that you are sending surfers to in your tgp maybe it will help...plus you can make money from sponsors by promoting them in avs sites. I'm by no means an expert but feel free to ask me questions and I can guide you to some tutorials where you can learn more icq (219783) or yahoo (kisskatlyn)

07-30-2003, 08:39 PM	#40
chowda Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Gooch city Posts: 9,527	me me me! u gotta take an azn guido. its the rules.. or else its discrimination! __________________ Someone finds you... 2007 PS: Nationalnet is the best host I've ever had. And i tried alot of them.

07-30-2003, 08:43 PM	#42
Mr.Teen Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Long Island, New York Posts: 800	Me. I am a guido and I rock the swoit sig. I also need someone to tell me to get on track, I'm always getting side tracked __________________ <img src="http://dn5.com/Dead12.gif">

07-30-2003, 09:30 PM	#44
siccmade Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Canton, Ohio Posts: 1,641	MAY I RECOMMEND A NEWBIE HES THE NUMBER ONE FUCK UP LIL2BROKE4ME PLEASE DO SOMETHING WITH THIS KID LESSON ONE SHOULD BE ALL ABOUT GETTING THE FUCK AWAY FROM GFY __________________ Adult XXX Hits - Adult Traffic Exchange. Get free traffic!

07-30-2003, 09:36 PM	#46
danarchy So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: westside Posts: 133	I suck can i do it......no motivation to

07-30-2003, 09:55 PM	#47
WendyB Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Woodinville Posts: 538	The way the Adult industry is going, folks might entertain ADOPTING ONE OF THE ADULT INDUSTRY BIG BOYS and/or their processors __________________ An act of kindness is a wonderful gift