Why I fired my secretary.... - GoFuckYourself.com

Buff · 07-10-2003, 04:14 PM

Two weeks ago was my 35th birthday
and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning
anyway.
I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday" and probably have a present for me.

She didn't even say "Good Morning" let alone any "Happy Birthday."

I thought, "Well, that's wives for you, the children will remember."

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.
When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office my secretary, Janet, said,

"Good morning, boss. Happy Birthday."
And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.

I worked until noon. Then, Janet knocked on my door and said,
"You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go."

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go;
we went out to the country to a little private place.
We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said,
"You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment."
After arriving at her apartment she said,
"Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go change."

"Sure," I excitedly replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
in a few minutes,
she came out carrying a big birthday cake,

followed by my wife, children,
and dozens of our friends,
all singing Happy Birthday.

And there I sat...

on the couch...

naked.

ytcracker · 07-10-2003, 04:15 PM

ahhahahahah funny

TurboAngel · 07-10-2003, 04:16 PM

LadyMischief · 07-10-2003, 04:17 PM

Bwahhahahahahahaha

Rockhound · 07-10-2003, 04:18 PM

no way thats a true story.

eiht_98 · 07-10-2003, 04:19 PM

haahaha....great story

liquidmoe · 07-10-2003, 04:20 PM

EZRhino · 07-10-2003, 04:24 PM

True or not, you know its happened to someone out there.

HEARTBREAKER · 07-10-2003, 04:25 PM

LOL hahahahaha

NoCarrier · 07-10-2003, 04:25 PM

FINALLY!!!!! AN ORIGINAL JOKE! I LAUGHED! OH MY GOD!!! I FEEL LIKE I AM HAPPY!!! THANK GOD!! THE INTERNET HAS A REASON TO EXIST..

LA Mike · 07-10-2003, 04:26 PM

NICE!!!!!!

Za Ha · 07-10-2003, 04:26 PM

That was a really good ending!

Ice · 07-10-2003, 04:26 PM

dumb ass

Peter Romero · 07-10-2003, 04:27 PM

That's fuckin FUNNY!

Who is the author?

SCJason · 07-10-2003, 04:29 PM

Now that would make a great "Ow3ned" pic !!!!

afrocreep · 07-10-2003, 04:29 PM

omg thats funny.. i was thinking man this is a nice feel-good story.. then i got to the end lol

http · 07-10-2003, 04:30 PM

muahhahah

body · 07-10-2003, 04:35 PM

Happy Birthday ROFL

Monique Niccole · 07-10-2003, 04:35 PM

Thank you for that. You made me giggle.

Matt 26z · 07-10-2003, 04:36 PM

This was on one of those fact or fiction short story shows. I like this story better though.

D00zer · 07-10-2003, 04:37 PM

Katlicious72 · 07-10-2003, 04:39 PM

That's hilarious

cezam · 07-10-2003, 04:40 PM

OMFG LMAO!

That's the best story I've read in last few months

Olivier · 07-10-2003, 04:44 PM

I almost pissed myself!! That's so funny!!

good one

AWC · 07-10-2003, 04:46 PM

or you could have read it here...
http://www.thefunnypage.com/naked/naked.htm
or
http://www.geocities.com/wwjoke/htm/fired_secretary.htm
or
http://www.terrajoke.com/Archive.asp...Funny%20Quotes
or
http://www.madbull4.net/weblog/archives/000116.html
or
http://www.indiabook.com/cgi-bin/jokes/dost.cgi?ID=68
or
http://www.balloon-juice.com/archives/002476.html
or
292 other places that it is posted on the web

jimmyf · 07-10-2003, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rockhound
no way thats a true story.

you are right heard it a year or 2 ago, it's still funny

austinth · 07-10-2003, 04:52 PM

Holy Shit! Sorry man, I couldn't help but laugh! I take it you've taken up residence in the dog house...

Herb Kornfield · 07-10-2003, 04:55 PM

Thats fucking wild man

TheViper · 07-10-2003, 04:58 PM

Priceless

eXperienZ · 07-10-2003, 05:19 PM

Nice story..
Too bad it isn't true.. Hehe..

07-10-2003, 04:14 PM	#1
Buff GFY Assassin Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 2,993	Why I fired my secretary.... Two weeks ago was my 35th birthday and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday" and probably have a present for me. She didn't even say "Good Morning" let alone any "Happy Birthday." I thought, "Well, that's wives for you, the children will remember." The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office my secretary, Janet, said, "Good morning, boss. Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon. Then, Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go." We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out to the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go change." "Sure," I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in a few minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday. And there I sat... on the couch... naked.

07-10-2003, 04:15 PM	#2
ytcracker stc is the greatest Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: rip sean murray Posts: 12,403	ahhahahahah funny __________________ www.ytcracker.com \| www.digitalgangster.com i love you

07-10-2003, 04:17 PM	#4
LadyMischief Orgasms N Such! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Oakville, Ontario Posts: 18,135	Bwahhahahahahahaha __________________ ICQ 3522039 Content Manager - orgasm.com [email protected]

07-10-2003, 04:18 PM	#5
Rockhound Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 334	no way thats a true story. __________________ ALL BUSTY BABES - The Biggest Boobs On The Net

07-10-2003, 04:25 PM	#9
HEARTBREAKER Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 2,984	LOL hahahahaha __________________ An Adult IT Staffing Solutions Company email: [email protected] icq: 418366319 Tel.#: 1-702-940-0789 (U.S. Toll Free)

07-10-2003, 04:16 PM	#3
TurboAngel H.B.I.C. Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: NC Posts: 30,122

07-10-2003, 04:19 PM	#6
eiht_98 Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: EU Posts: 6,103	haahaha....great story

07-10-2003, 04:20 PM	#7
liquidmoe Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: NY Posts: 4,994

07-10-2003, 04:24 PM	#8
EZRhino Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: couch Posts: 6,258	True or not, you know its happened to someone out there.

07-10-2003, 04:25 PM	#10
NoCarrier We need more free porn Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Montreal Posts: 16,356	FINALLY!!!!! AN ORIGINAL JOKE! I LAUGHED! OH MY GOD!!! I FEEL LIKE I AM HAPPY!!! THANK GOD!! THE INTERNET HAS A REASON TO EXIST.. __________________

07-10-2003, 04:26 PM	#11
LA Mike Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Orange County, CA Posts: 3,056	NICE!!!!!!

07-10-2003, 04:26 PM	#12
Za Ha Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Still lost Posts: 5,112	That was a really good ending!

07-10-2003, 04:26 PM	#13
Ice Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Sunny California Posts: 26,053	dumb ass __________________ icq 1904905

07-10-2003, 04:27 PM	#14
Peter Romero Long time no happy ending Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: San Diego CA Posts: 10,578	That's fuckin FUNNY! Who is the author? __________________ POVCash [email protected] See them all here: http://www.Petergirls.com

07-10-2003, 04:29 PM	#15
SCJason Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: California Posts: 1,095	Now that would make a great "Ow3ned" pic !!!! __________________ SCJason The New SilverCash "V. 3 It's HERE !" ICQ 138128769 <img src="http://www.yoadrian.biz/holidays.gif" border="0"></A>

07-10-2003, 04:29 PM	#16
afrocreep Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: ON, Canada Posts: 1,074	omg thats funny.. i was thinking man this is a nice feel-good story.. then i got to the end lol

07-10-2003, 04:30 PM	#17
http Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 1,811	muahhahah

07-10-2003, 04:35 PM	#18
body Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 5,016	Happy Birthday ROFL

07-10-2003, 04:35 PM	#19
Monique Niccole Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: San Francisco Posts: 5,653	Thank you for that. You made me giggle.

07-10-2003, 04:36 PM	#20
Matt 26z So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: ¤ª"˜¨๑۩۞۩๑¨˜"ª¤ Posts: 18,481	This was on one of those fact or fiction short story shows. I like this story better though.

07-10-2003, 04:37 PM	#21
D00zer Registered User Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 48	__________________ DsxCash.com - NEW RHYTHM OF STYLE "Extreme"

07-10-2003, 04:39 PM	#22
Katlicious72 Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Californicating in San Diego Posts: 1,665	That's hilarious __________________ Fetish Preview....Coming Soon! ICQ# 308-229-815

07-10-2003, 04:40 PM	#23
cezam Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: CZ, EU Posts: 1,363	OMFG LMAO! That's the best story I've read in last few months __________________

07-10-2003, 04:44 PM	#24
Olivier Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 656	I almost pissed myself!! That's so funny!! good one

07-10-2003, 04:46 PM	#25
AWC Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Bumfuck Posts: 1,223	or you could have read it here... http://www.thefunnypage.com/naked/naked.htm or http://www.geocities.com/wwjoke/htm/fired_secretary.htm or http://www.terrajoke.com/Archive.asp...Funny%20Quotes or http://www.madbull4.net/weblog/archives/000116.html or http://www.indiabook.com/cgi-bin/jokes/dost.cgi?ID=68 or http://www.balloon-juice.com/archives/002476.html or 292 other places that it is posted on the web

07-10-2003, 04:52 PM	#27
austinth Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Fantasy Island Posts: 1,770	Holy Shit! Sorry man, I couldn't help but laugh! I take it you've taken up residence in the dog house... __________________ Get A $25 Circuit City GIFT Card - *FREE*!

07-10-2003, 04:55 PM	#28
Herb Kornfield Is on the 1 Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Philly Burbs Posts: 4,996	Thats fucking wild man

07-10-2003, 04:58 PM	#29
TheViper Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: the streets. Posts: 2,560	Priceless

07-10-2003, 05:19 PM	#30
eXperienZ Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Norway Posts: 272	Nice story.. Too bad it isn't true.. Hehe.. __________________ No Sig