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Is PHP the bottleneck? Tech Is PHP the bottleneck?
Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed.

 
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Old 04-18-2026, 03:52 AM   #1
Duced
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Is PHP the bottleneck?
Something seems slow here .

Perhaps servers have been scaled down?

Feels like it's 1997 again rocking a 33.6 Kbps modem lately here.
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Old 04-18-2026, 11:21 AM   #2
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running on a 300 baud modem
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Old 04-18-2026, 11:43 AM   #3
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Old 04-18-2026, 03:05 PM   #4
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They’re just not feeding the hamsters as much as they used to…
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Old 04-18-2026, 04:20 PM   #5
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running on a 300 baud modem
300 baud modem:
30 chars/sec.
Text crawls like molasses.
Download a pic? Go eat dinner.

Pure 1980s pain. 😂
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Old 04-18-2026, 05:11 PM   #6
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. . .
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Old 04-18-2026, 07:04 PM   #7
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running on a 300 baud modem
At least with a 300 baud modem you would still see it loading...
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Old 04-19-2026, 09:35 AM   #8
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At least with a 300 baud modem you would still see it loading...
Are you seeing intermittent failed requests?
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Old 04-19-2026, 02:30 PM   #9
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Something seems slow here .

Perhaps servers have been scaled down?

Feels like it's 1997 again rocking a 33.6 Kbps modem lately here.
I would think it's outdated SQL version before PHP.
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Old 04-19-2026, 03:06 PM   #10
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this site is running an extremely old and hacked version of vbb, you can see it in the source code
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Old 04-20-2026, 01:04 PM   #11
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According to Google-
vBulletin 3.8.8, launched around April 2013, is a legacy version, making it over 13 years old as of April 2026. While the 3.8 series was officially supported around 2010, this specific release was a late-stage update to the popular 3.x branch, often used for its stability in the early 2010s.

Release Date: April 2013 (Alpha 1).
Context: It is an end-of-life (EOL) product from vBulletin, often considered a legacy version compared to 4.x, 5.x, or current alternatives.

As of 2026, it is highly likely that any remaining 3.8.8 sites are running on severely outdated technology.
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Old 04-20-2026, 03:28 PM   #12
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be a shame if someone used AI to pwn the site
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Old 04-20-2026, 03:58 PM   #13
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be a shame if someone used AI to pwn the site
Site is so old that AI actually dumps the tech stack onto gitlab, remakes it into a functioning version and then it gets instant 504 gateways.
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