Shitty Jokes - GoFuckYourself.com

The Duck · 01-31-2014, 10:52 AM

What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke?

Your mom can't take a joke..

The Duck · 01-31-2014, 10:53 AM

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"

The Duck · 01-31-2014, 10:56 AM

A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table. He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!".

She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?".

The man says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now!".

L-Pink · 01-31-2014, 10:59 AM

nice!

J. Falcon · 01-31-2014, 11:00 AM

Those are funny.

Dvae · 01-31-2014, 06:19 PM

A sweet little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer.

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course.

A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?

So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.'

"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck!

Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays." Said the sweet little old lady_evil

xNetworx · 01-31-2014, 06:33 PM

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

Because he is black

01-31-2014, 10:52 AM	#1
The Duck Adult Content Provider Industry Role: Join Date: May 2005 Location: Europe Posts: 18,243	Shitty Jokes What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke.. __________________ Skype Horusmaia ICQ 41555245 Email [email protected]

01-31-2014, 10:53 AM	#2
The Duck Adult Content Provider Industry Role: Join Date: May 2005 Location: Europe Posts: 18,243	Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?" __________________ Skype Horusmaia ICQ 41555245 Email [email protected]

01-31-2014, 10:56 AM	#3
The Duck Adult Content Provider Industry Role: Join Date: May 2005 Location: Europe Posts: 18,243	A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table. He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!". She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?". The man says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now!". __________________ Skype Horusmaia ICQ 41555245 Email [email protected]

01-31-2014, 11:00 AM	#5
J. Falcon www.AdultCopywriters.com Industry Role: Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 31,619	Those are funny. __________________ Adult Copywriters SEO Content for Porn Sites sales at adultcopywriters dot com

01-31-2014, 06:19 PM	#6
Dvae Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: US Posts: 5,326	A sweet little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk. Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag." "Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer. "Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?" "Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it? So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.' "Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?" "Not everybody pays." Said the sweet little old lady_evil __________________ . . Arguing with a troll is a lot like wrestling in the mud with a pig, after a couple of hours you realize the pig likes it.

01-31-2014, 10:59 AM	#4
L-Pink working on my tan Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Florida/Kentucky Posts: 39,151	nice!

01-31-2014, 06:33 PM	#7
xNetworx So Fucking What Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Whore Island Posts: 14,445	Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he is black