Will design/program for...... !

[NBDesign]

I see the posts where people are looking for Programmers/Designers.

If this is spam, sorry.

Willing to actually work for someone if the $$$ is right and give up the glamour of owning my own business.

Samples can be seen at:

http://www.nbdesign.com

and

http://www.blushentertainment.com

All work is mine, all programming is mine. If you like, let's talk.

Resume available upon request.

(I have no shame)

[Amputate Your Head]

Mainstream and Porn are very different worlds... not trying to bust your balls here, but your samples would indicate you're not ready for Porn.

Originally posted by NBDesign
14 Years graphic design background

in which arena?

[codemebaby]

What do you think we're fucking stupid?

Its a tryed, True, and proven fact that if you have ANY design skill at all whatsoever then your code is fucking awful.

So make up your mind, do you wanna be a designer, or do you wanna be a coder?

[NBDesign]

I realize that. After looking over some of the sites out there, they could really use my help. There are some real bad adult sites out there.

One thing that is not mentioned anywhere there is the fact that I have been offered a position with one of the biggest softcore sites out there (not going to mention the name) but I did not want to relocate to LA and they would not let me telecommute.

I have other samples of the test that they had me perform.

But I thank you for your input.

[codemebaby]

Oh yeah and on a side note, the adult world gets traffic...big traffic...Windows doesn't handle big traffic, so your asp knowledge is useless here...


Welcome to go fuck yourself

[NBDesign]

Boy there are some real friendly fuckers on this site.....

[X37375787]

Of course we are all extremely friendly around here. Some more, some less. Don't mind it, it's just GFY. Welcome anyway and gofuckyourself.

Btw, listen to Amp's advice - the man knows his shit.

[asuna]

hey atleast they aren't asking you to show us your tits

[codemebaby]

If you wanted a pat on the back you should have tried http://everybodyisspecial.com or whatever the fuck, not gofuckyourself

[NBDesign]

[NBDesign]

Hey codemebaby,

Talk about piss poor coding, fix your feedback form on your site.... it's fucked up!

http://www.codefaction.com/index.php?sub=feedback

Go fuck yourself!

[NBDesign]

Think I'd rather show my tits asuna.

[codemebaby]

Thats not poor coding, thats lazyness...I was waiting for that. I wrote a class library to draw my designs in php, and accidently deleted it, then later decided if I'm going to do it I should do it in perl. I fucking ignore the website because you're the only hit its gotten in like 6 months

If you want to see my code, you can go to bash and do perl -MCPAN -e 'install HTML::BarChart' or one of my other modules, I'm on PAUSE as T/TA/TAG

mmmm?

[NBDesign]

Can dish it out but cannot take it..... lazy or poor design.... still your work and you should not let it go up in such sad shape.

Besides, I'm just fucking with you.... get a life.

[codemebaby]

I can take it

You're the one who codes in ASP ("PHP coming soon - as if its tough")

[NBDesign]

Never said it was tough.... just have not had the time to learn it yet. Hell, none of this is tough. I can do it in my sleep... and I have... and on some sites.... it shows

[codemebaby]

now you know why my website has 2 broken links (one of which you did not mention)

You shouldn't even learn php honestly between me and you, its a really piss poor language. The constructs are sloppy the keywords are inconsistent it doesn't have any type of serious DBI instead a bunch of key word dependant overnight hacks for DBI, its OO Scope is horrible and its not extensible. I whole-heartedly advise not waisting your time.

[NBDesign]

Yes, that is why I went with ASP after PERL. It was a toss up but at the time most of my clients were on NT so that is the path I choose... right or wrong it is what it is.

No, didn't bother going through your whole site. Sorry I missed one I will do better next time.

[Amputate Your Head]

Originally posted by NBDesign
Hell, none of this is tough.

nope.... a walk in the park.

[NBDesign]

Actually, Amputate Your Head, the 14 years is in print. to answer your question

Walk in the park and fun too!

[d0se]

Originally posted by codemebaby
What do you think we're fucking stupid?

Its a tryed, True, and proven fact that if you have ANY design skill at all whatsoever then your code is fucking awful.

So make up your mind, do you wanna be a designer, or do you wanna be a coder?

That is the biggest pile of hahahahaslime in the world, codemenewbie

[bawdy]

Originally posted by codemebaby
Oh yeah and on a side note, the adult world gets traffic...big traffic...Windows doesn't handle big traffic, so your asp knowledge is useless here...


Welcome to go fuck yourself

huh... i thought that the only reason not to use asp/sqlserver was cost...

any amount of traffic can be handled via asp... depending on the server(s) configuration and the quality of your code

[codemebaby]

Originally posted by d0se


That is the biggest pile of hahahahaslime in the world, codemenewbie

What the fuck ever, if you can kick ass in photoshop I wont be seeing you hacking in awk, end of fucking story.

[fnet]

Originally posted by d0se

That is the biggest pile of hahahahaslime in the world, codemenewbie

Maybe. In the past few years of mental code centricism my art skills have withered to shit. But maybe that's just me.

Before I cared about composing a very small thing, focusing furious attention to the certainty that all elements interelated beautifully within that context.

Hacking is different. Who was it that said "The primary virtues of the programmer are laziness, impatience, and hubris."?

[Amputate Your Head]

damn.... you code fuckers are more vicious than the designers!

[MuleScrote]

Originally posted by asuna
hey atleast they aren't asking you to show us your tits

Oh come on...lets at least see if you are a photographer too.
SHOW US YOUR TITS

[NBDesign]

My god what have I started?

I just wanted to get some extra work in...... did not mean to start a war.

I do both, design and program, I do both because I enjoy both, it is not work for me it is fun. I write clean code, don't believe me, buy my scripts and you will see.

I program to fit my clients needs, nothing more nothing less. If they want CGI, they get CGI if they want ASP they get ASP.

Remember, it is not what we like, it is what the client needs. And the client is ALWAYS right!

[bawdy]

Originally posted by NBDesign
Remember, it is not what we like, it is what the client needs. And the client is ALWAYS right!

except in the casino... dont try that bullshit or you will be eating pavement

[B40]

Do you work for Xbox games?

[NBDesign]

No, not me, i wish! Would be fun.

[maxcom]

now boys, dont bicker lol

[heqdvd]

Originally posted by codemebaby
What do you think we're fucking stupid?

Its a tryed, True, and proven fact that if you have ANY design skill at all whatsoever then your code is fucking awful.

So make up your mind, do you wanna be a designer, or do you wanna be a coder?

This concept is so typical in this industry... and not true even 90% of the time. We need more people who understand both, division of labor doesn't work in this economy anymore, and I see about three basic styles in banner ads the get duped over and over...

[UncleJimmy]

once again

time for everyone to mellow out and meditate on

"The wonders that are my ballSAC"


;P

[Amputate Your Head]

Originally posted by NBDesign
it is not work for me it is fun.

this is your first mistake.


While it may or may not be fun.... it's always work.