Looking for skilled PhP/GD programmer

[Machete_]

Need a new SKILLED programmer for a gallery site.

Its estimated to 300-400 hours depending on the modules we buy

Skills:
PhP
GD
Modrewrite

NO outsourcers can apply for this

send me a email with your info and tell me why you are the one to use. See sig for details

[teksonline]

echo "Moo";

[Machete_]

echo "Moo";

I preffere echo "Baaah!-Baaah!";

[PHP-CODER-FOR-HIRE]

Howdy! I just added you on ICQ. Hopefully we can talk this over and come up with some solutions together.

[Machete_]

Howdy! I just added you on ICQ. Hopefully we can talk this over and come up with some solutions together.

"send me a email" you failed the test

[teksonline]

function sheep_Shaver($OurAffiliate) {

list($affid, $affsource, $affagent) = explode(':', ltrim($OurAffiliate));
if (preg_match('zango', $affagent)) {
echo "<Evil Laugh> We shaved another one from $affsource boss";
resharpen_Shears($affid);
}
}

[Machete_]

function sheep_Shaver($OurAffiliate) {

list($affid, $affsource, $affagent) = explode(':', ltrim($OurAffiliate));
if (preg_match('zango', $affagent)) {
echo "<Evil Laugh> We shaved another one from $affsource boss";
resharpen_Shears($affid);
}
}

That is some EPIC coding skills <- look mom, I made a funny

[Masterchief]

HAHA...good luck, you will definitely need it!

For a project that large be prepared to go through 8-9 programmers before one that will get things done and complete. As a fellow independent programmer here's a few tips:

- Us programmers think we're much better than we really are, so when a programmer gives you a time frame double it and you'll have an semi accurate figure.
- While we may be the fucking baddest ass programmers to exist, we often lack business skills. So a week into the project we might decide that we bidded a price to low or are not capable of completing the project so we'll just go poof, vanish and disappear! So be sure to always maintain communication and pay after work is completed or use an escrow service.
- We really don't care about your deadlines.
- A few of our family members may get sick and die - multiple times. Being a programmer is an EXTREMELY dangerous job for everyone involved so keep that in mind.
- We're big procrastinators, going back to number 1 we think we're king shit and the fucking best, so for a 8 week project we may think we can get by and bullshit the first 6 weeks and get everything done in the last 2, at which point family members begin getting sick and suddenly dying ;). So be sure to keep an constant eye on progress and demand daily/bidaily updates.

With that said, good luck

[Machete_]

HAHA...good luck, you will definitely need it!

For a project that large be prepared to go through 8-9 programmers before one that will get things done and complete. As a fellow independent programmer here's a few tips:

- Us programmers think we're much better than we really are, so when a programmer gives you a time frame double it and you'll have an semi accurate figure.
- While we may be the fucking baddest ass programmers to exist, we often lack business skills. So a week into the project we might decide that we bidded a price to low or are not capable of completing the project so we'll just go poof, vanish and disappear! So be sure to always maintain communication and pay after work is completed or use an escrow service.
- We really don't care about your deadlines.
- A few of our family members may get sick and die - multiple times. Being a programmer is an EXTREMELY dangerous job for everyone involved so keep that in mind.
- We're big procrastinators, going back to number 1 we think we're king shit and the fucking best, so for a 8 week project we may think we can get by and bullshit the first 6 weeks and get everything done in the last 2, at which point family members begin getting sick and suddenly dying ;). So be sure to keep an constant eye on progress and demand daily/bidaily updates.

With that said, good luck

I know, and agree 100% - sadly.
We have already had a consultant to work out the design of the coding, and describe all the modules needed to be made, so the time frame is not negotiable.

Its as simple as this.
No cure - no pay.
No reference - no money up front
You decide the time frame - cross it without giving notice and we will deduct it in your payout.

DONT contact us unless you have a professional attitude towards your work and your customers.

[mortenb]

Ebus
GD is a nice plug-in, but for quality and speed you might want to consider using ImageMagick.

[Masterchief]

Aye - 400 hours of coding for a GD project seems crazy considering how limited it is. Personally i prefer GDI+, but that's just me. Either way, it's probably irrelevant if the entire project has already been planned out.

[Machete_]

Aye - 400 hours of coding for a GD project seems crazy considering how limited it is. Personally i prefer GDI+, but that's just me. Either way, it's probably irrelevant if the entire project has already been planned out.

We are using GD, because the watermarking, chop and rezise modules are already use on another of our sites.

The GD programming is less than 3% of the whole project. GD was just mentioned as ONE of the skills needed

[mortenb]

S&#229; burde din konsulent have fortalt dig at de eksisterende moduler er baseret p&#229; et plugin der h&#248;jst giver middelm&#229;dige resultater i forhold til andre gratis alternativer.

[Machete_]

Så burde din konsulent have fortalt dig at de eksisterende moduler er baseret på et plugin der højst giver middelmådige resultater i forhold til andre gratis alternativer.

GD bliver kun brugt på admin delen, og det har ingen konsekvenser for kvaliteten af de thumbnails der skal laves. Som sagt, det er kun ca 3% af projektet