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Old 01-20-2005, 10:58 PM   #1
BradM
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My personality is lacking.. (question)

Is there some sort of class you can take to fix that? Or do you HAVE to interact with people and experience things to get a personality?
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:00 PM   #2
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get laid more often and it will help
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:01 PM   #3
BradM
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get laid more often and it will help
Hrm... serious question. How does one get laid on a regular basis? You gotta teach me... cause I have NO idea.
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:01 PM   #4
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amazing what a few Gold cards and a large bank account can do for ones personality and friend base
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:02 PM   #5
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take a drama class or public speaking,
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:06 PM   #6
BradM
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take a drama class or public speaking,
Good advice... I might take public speaking next semester now. Thanks.
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:07 PM   #7
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np brad.. that helps you interact easier with confidence
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:10 PM   #8
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Try

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/AS...843765-4536920

Great for sales too.

Regardless, I've had the chance to chat with you over ICQ and you're a good guy in my book. Keep on Keepin' On!

Gene aka $5 Submissions
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:12 PM   #9
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fuck people, be anti-social
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:14 PM   #10
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Regardless, I've had the chance to chat with you over ICQ and you're a good guy in my book. Keep on Keepin' On!
Thanks, I appreciate it. In my little social group I am fine. But I am a stiff whiteguy with little in terms of a sense of humour. I find most people to be sitting in an uncomfortable silence when conversing with me- and it has always been that way since after highschool.

Get me in front of someone I don't know and forget it...
I guess my problem is I can not small talk. Everything I say has a purpose or deep meaning and some people don't give a shit. They just want to hear how you got wasted last weekend.

Anyways- that's my mini rant for the evening.
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:17 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by BradM
Hrm... serious question. How does one get laid on a regular basis? You gotta teach me... cause I have NO idea.

Come off as slightly arrogant and pretend to have lots of money. You can't be afraid of rejection. For every hottie that will jump in the sack with you there are 2+ that will flip you the finger and leave because they will see you as being too aggressive.


Edit: and as Sly said, you have to be good at small talk

Last edited by Drake; 01-20-2005 at 11:19 PM..
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:18 PM   #12
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Nah, sounds like you're somewhat like me in person. I really don't say much, but when I do its usually either funny or has some substance to it. I'm not much for the fake "chit-chat" that many tend to go for. Oh well.

Although... give me a drink and I won't shut up. ;-)
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:20 PM   #13
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Nah, sounds like you're somewhat like me in person. I really don't say much, but when I do its usually either funny or has some substance to it. I'm not much for the fake "chit-chat" that many tend to go for. Oh well.

Although... give me a drink and I won't shut up. ;-)
Yeah. Sometimes I wish I was though... I mean so many people use it as an icebreaker. Me? I really don't have any way to ease into conversations. I have always had such a stiff and bland personality it is sickening.

I always figured myself to find a similar type woman, have kids and live a really boring structured life, and raise more boring white people into the world just as my parents did.
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:23 PM   #14
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It is all in your energy. Smile a lot, when you smile, it releases "happiness." Sorry, I forget the name...

Smile a lot, and practice finding something interesting in everyone. One thing I am good at is looking someone over and quickly finding something to talk about. You need to empower the person you speak to.

"You know, it is great to finally meet you, you are from Phoenix, right?"

Things like that. I talk to everyone in my path. Never try to talk to cover silence, give them something to talk about.
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:23 PM   #15
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Yeah. Sometimes I wish I was though... I mean so many people use it as an icebreaker. Me? I really don't have any way to ease into conversations. I have always had such a stiff and bland personality it is sickening.

I always figured myself to find a similar type woman, have kids and live a really boring structured life, and raise more boring white people into the world just as my parents did.
the first thing you need to do is have more self confidence... no more putting yourself down....
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:33 PM   #16
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Dude you think about it way too much. Like I told you today, its all about confidence. And like Cory said, smile! I always have some stupid smirk on my face, that's me. Every picture I've seen of you has a straight face. Every picture of me on the other hand I have my tongue out... haha but thats a totally different issue!
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Old 01-20-2005, 11:42 PM   #17
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Nice!1
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Old 01-21-2005, 03:22 AM   #18
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I'm not a big fan of small talk or chit chat as well. When I'm talking with someone, I like to learn so I mostly listen. It's hard for a person to learn when a person is talking.
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Old 01-21-2005, 03:22 AM   #19
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get laid more often and it will help
well it certainly cant hurt can it
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Old 01-21-2005, 03:45 AM   #20
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Never thought I'd post this....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike33
Come off as slightly arrogant and pretend to have lots of money. You can't be afraid of rejection. For every hottie that will jump in the sack with you there are 2+ that will flip you the finger and leave because they will see you as being too aggressive.


Edit: and as Sly said, you have to be good at small talk
But Mike is correct.....the more self confident you appear and the more people of all types that you meet will help alot. And as Sly said, learn to be good at small talk, especially with the people you don't find that interesting. You can learn a lot from very successful people, unless they are the blowhard type. Just pay close attention to those you meet....your personality will grow as you mingle with different types of people. Do not stick with the same circle, venture out...don't be scared...;)

xoxo,

Candice~
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Old 01-21-2005, 04:11 AM   #21
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I'm not a big fan of small talk or chit chat as well. When I'm talking with someone, I like to learn so I mostly listen. It's hard for a person to learn when a person is talking.
I'm the same way. There was a time when I could actually talk about fluff (recall talking for hours on the phone with girls in highschool?) but I've always been much more of a listener/observer. But the real world is a lot like GFY in this respect. A thread about "hitting it" will go on for pages with thousands of views while some very substantive threads fall off the page without notice. In other words, the "small talk" type of threads tend to get much more attention and action than those that are informative, thoughtful, inquisitive, or interpersonal in nature.

It's just the way it is, so you have to adjust, assuming you want to get to know people or to move in on that pretty girl you've been eyeballing.

Last edited by Drake; 01-21-2005 at 04:13 AM..
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Old 01-21-2005, 04:12 AM   #22
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amazing what a few Gold cards and a large bank account can do for ones personality and friend base

True dat.
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Old 01-21-2005, 04:15 AM   #23
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Originally Posted by $5 submissions
I'm not a big fan of small talk or chit chat as well. When I'm talking with someone, I like to learn so I mostly listen. It's hard for a person to learn when a person is talking.

yup. im an "observer" too. its amazing how much you can learn/hear when you just shut up & listen.
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Old 01-21-2005, 04:15 AM   #24
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"I am the alphamale, I am better than everybody!"

That will help you get more girls! ;)
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Old 01-21-2005, 07:10 AM   #25
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Here is the trick of it....

Be slighty critical then helpful.

Then... positive mirroring, monkeys love it.
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Old 01-21-2005, 07:30 AM   #26
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the first thing you need to do is have more self confidence... no more putting yourself down....
Couldn't have said it better myself. Confidence is key man! Think about what you've accomplished in the past and let that be your fuel. I fucked this beautiful brazilian model a little over two years ago and I have and will continue to use that memory to boost my self confidence in so many situations. One thing I know about you is that you're an adult webmaster. Compare your job to the rest of the world and that should put a smile on your face. If you told most people that you make money from the internet they would probably: A) laugh out of ignorance ... or B) be jealous and envious. Cheer up dude!
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Old 01-21-2005, 08:00 AM   #27
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Hrm... serious question. How does one get laid on a regular basis? You gotta teach me... cause I have NO idea.
First, you have to DONT looks gay !
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Old 01-21-2005, 08:01 AM   #28
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your either born with it or not...some have it some dont
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Old 01-21-2005, 08:17 AM   #29
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amazing what a few Gold cards and a large bank account can do for ones personality and friend base
sad but true
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Old 01-21-2005, 08:19 AM   #30
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Go out and live life, travel, do something crazy. Get stories and meet people. It'll open up your eyes, give you stories and add some character.
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:04 AM   #31
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buy a dog
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:30 AM   #32
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Live outside the internet. Meet people that are NOT part of the industry that as taken over your life.

That is the most common problem with all of us. Remember in Nanaimo i never went out. Just stayed at home and lived an online life.

Now that I am in Toronto I go out, have friends outside the industry and have lost 20 pounds and feel GREAT.

You know you can do it as well bro ;-)
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:30 AM   #33
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lol youll be ok, just keep talking to me on icq
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:35 AM   #34
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I am sure your personality is fine........but what you must do is get some hobbies....learn to play an instrument....chicks dig that.....
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:39 AM   #35
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"I am the alphamale, I am better than everybody!"

That will help you get more girls! ;)
they also what to see who got the biggest dorsel fin as well.......
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:41 AM   #36
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Good advice... I might take public speaking next semester now. Thanks.
I'd go with the Drama class. A lot of chicks are into that so can kill 2 birds with one stone.
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Old 01-21-2005, 09:59 AM   #37
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That is something that you have to fix yourself.
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Old 01-21-2005, 10:24 AM   #38
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Thanks for the advice everyone... means a lot. I have always been the guy who sites in the corner and listens to everything that is going on. Ask bdjuf about new years. I ENJOY it more... learning and STUDYING people. I like seeing how people tick.

Anyways... this really made me feel good knowing I'm not the only one like this reall- sounds like I just need to get out more.
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Old 01-21-2005, 10:40 AM   #39
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My mom use to say that I would talk to a pole if it would talk back to me. I usually find something to talk about. I am ok with silense too, sometimes there is just not much to say.

You should start going to some single events like speed dating just to practice...do not go with your friends..force yourself to talk to people. Do not worry about making a fool of yourself, they probably feel the same way.
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Old 01-21-2005, 10:46 AM   #40
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you are not that bad
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Old 01-21-2005, 12:00 PM   #41
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i knew this long ago
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