Bill Burr on Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats" - GoFuckYourself.com

Tube Ace · 06-11-2013, 08:50 AM

I love this bit. I always look forward to his weekly (Monday Morning) Podcast.

scuba steve · 06-11-2013, 09:10 AM

this guy is one of my fav comedians out there, like to see him get big, he deserves it.

kane · 06-11-2013, 11:51 AM

This song is the center piece of one of the oddest, funniest moments of my life.

A few years back my brother and his then wife were having troubles. She had cheated on him and they separated (they eventually got divorced). His wife met some guy at a bar and started seeing him behind my brother's back. Her best friend caught them screwing in his truck in the parking lot of this bar and the best friend was the one that ended up telling my brother what was going on.

This all happened right around Thanksgiving/Christmas. My brother and her have three kids so my brother was trying to make the holidays as normal as possible for the kids knowing that divorce was coming and things were going to get rough after the first of the year.

So, Thanksgiving was awkward. There are a bunch of people over at my brother's place like any other typical year and everyone is acting like nothing is different. We eat then afterward people are sitting around, talking and having some desserts. There is a football game on and it is halftime and Carrie Underwood is the performer. She sings "Before He Cheats." My brother's wife jumps up and starts dancing around, telling everyone that this is her favorite song. She is in the kitchen singing it loudly and really enjoying herself. I am in the living room with my brother, her brother, my mom and a few other people. We are all looking at each other because nobody knows what to do or say about the person who cheated loving the cheating song.

Finally I had to speak. I said, "You know the funny thing about this awkward situation is that she is in there singing and enjoying the moment and in her heart she envisions herself as Carrie Underwood carving her name in the truck and swinging the bat when in real life she is the one who can't shoot whisky and my brother is Carrie Underwood."

Her brother lets out a snort then starts laughing then the entire room bursts into laughter. What I didn't know is that most of her family were really pissed at her for cheating. They love my brother and didn't like how she was treating him. She comes into the room and asks what everyone is laughing at and her brother just blurts it out and says, "You do realize in that song you're the skank who can't shoot whisky right?" She turned pale, ran out of the room and hid the bedroom the rest of the afternoon.

Every time I hear that song or even see it mentioned I see the look on her face as the realization sets in. To this day I still see her every now and then because she and my brother have joint custody of the kids. If she walks into a room, I hear that song in my head.

Sorry for the long post.

sperbonzo · 06-11-2013, 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kane

This song is the center piece of one of the oddest, funniest moments of my life.

A few years back my brother and his then wife were having troubles. She had cheated on him and they separated (they eventually got divorced). His wife met some guy at a bar and started seeing him behind my brother's back. Her best friend caught them screwing in his truck in the parking lot of this bar and the best friend was the one that ended up telling my brother what was going on.

This all happened right around Thanksgiving/Christmas. My brother and her have three kids so my brother was trying to make the holidays as normal as possible for the kids knowing that divorce was coming and things were going to get rough after the first of the year.

So, Thanksgiving was awkward. There are a bunch of people over at my brother's place like any other typical year and everyone is acting like nothing is different. We eat then afterward people are sitting around, talking and having some desserts. There is a football game on and it is halftime and Carrie Underwood is the performer. She sings "Before He Cheats." My brother's wife jumps up and starts dancing around, telling everyone that this is her favorite song. She is in the kitchen singing it loudly and really enjoying herself. I am in the living room with my brother, her brother, my mom and a few other people. We are all looking at each other because nobody knows what to do or say about the person who cheated loving the cheating song.

Finally I had to speak. I said, "You know the funny thing about this awkward situation is that she is in there singing and enjoying the moment and in her heart she envisions herself as Carrie Underwood carving her name in the truck and swinging the bat when in real life she is the one who can't shoot whisky and my brother is Carrie Underwood."

Her brother lets out a snort then starts laughing then the entire room bursts into laughter. What I didn't know is that most of her family were really pissed at her for cheating. They love my brother and didn't like how she was treating him. She comes into the room and asks what everyone is laughing at and her brother just blurts it out and says, "You do realize in that song you're the skank who can't shoot whisky right?" She turned pale, ran out of the room and hid the bedroom the rest of the afternoon.

Every time I hear that song or even see it mentioned I see the look on her face as the realization sets in. To this day I still see her every now and then because she and my brother have joint custody of the kids. If she walks into a room, I hear that song in my head.

Sorry for the long post.

Good story. Seriously.

.

06-11-2013, 08:26 AM	#1
cthulhu_waves Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: San Francisco, CA Posts: 1,966	Bill Burr on Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats" __________________ DATINGFACTORY.COM WE BUILD YOUR BRAND, NOT OURS! Private Label *Dating* Solutions & Affiliate *Dating* Network.

06-11-2013, 09:10 AM	#3
scuba steve Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: i'm in miami bitch Posts: 1,888	this guy is one of my fav comedians out there, like to see him get big, he deserves it. __________________

06-11-2013, 08:50 AM	#2
Tube Ace So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: with your dream girl Posts: 4,941	I love this bit. I always look forward to his weekly (Monday Morning) Podcast.

06-11-2013, 11:51 AM	#4
kane Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: portland, OR Posts: 20,684	This song is the center piece of one of the oddest, funniest moments of my life. A few years back my brother and his then wife were having troubles. She had cheated on him and they separated (they eventually got divorced). His wife met some guy at a bar and started seeing him behind my brother's back. Her best friend caught them screwing in his truck in the parking lot of this bar and the best friend was the one that ended up telling my brother what was going on. This all happened right around Thanksgiving/Christmas. My brother and her have three kids so my brother was trying to make the holidays as normal as possible for the kids knowing that divorce was coming and things were going to get rough after the first of the year. So, Thanksgiving was awkward. There are a bunch of people over at my brother's place like any other typical year and everyone is acting like nothing is different. We eat then afterward people are sitting around, talking and having some desserts. There is a football game on and it is halftime and Carrie Underwood is the performer. She sings "Before He Cheats." My brother's wife jumps up and starts dancing around, telling everyone that this is her favorite song. She is in the kitchen singing it loudly and really enjoying herself. I am in the living room with my brother, her brother, my mom and a few other people. We are all looking at each other because nobody knows what to do or say about the person who cheated loving the cheating song. Finally I had to speak. I said, "You know the funny thing about this awkward situation is that she is in there singing and enjoying the moment and in her heart she envisions herself as Carrie Underwood carving her name in the truck and swinging the bat when in real life she is the one who can't shoot whisky and my brother is Carrie Underwood." Her brother lets out a snort then starts laughing then the entire room bursts into laughter. What I didn't know is that most of her family were really pissed at her for cheating. They love my brother and didn't like how she was treating him. She comes into the room and asks what everyone is laughing at and her brother just blurts it out and says, "You do realize in that song you're the skank who can't shoot whisky right?" She turned pale, ran out of the room and hid the bedroom the rest of the afternoon. Every time I hear that song or even see it mentioned I see the look on her face as the realization sets in. To this day I still see her every now and then because she and my brother have joint custody of the kids. If she walks into a room, I hear that song in my head. Sorry for the long post.