Weird Shit Thats Happened To You!
 

Fuck...just thinking bout the fucked up things ive seen....

- one time me and a buddy scared stone cold steve austin into calling security to remove us from backstage at a a wrestling event. my friend vomited on his hand and ended up wiping it on austin.

-i watched police horses almost crush people to death at a world series celebration riot.

-saw a guy get hit on a hay tractor by a trans am on a country road.

It's a long story. I've said it before, so I just copied and pasted...

You guys can all laugh now, but this actually happened to me once. I met this real cute girl downtown at Croce's, asked her to lunch. We talked for a while and it turns out she had no boyfriend. My initial thought was "score!", she was really digging me so I figured I'd definitely be able to get some ass from that.

So we end up taking a nice little walk. She sees this hotel and says we should see what their 4 hr. rates were. Dirt cheap, so I was all over that. Pussy, here I come!

Oh, did I mention the vitals? Cute little blonde (I have a thing for blondes, so I was already weak in the knees), real small frame (perfect for sit 'n spins), a killer ass, and a nice little pair of titties.

Anyway, we're up in the room making out. Her top comes off, they were definitely fake, but I love fake titties. Next thing I know, she's slowly moving down to my crotch and pulls out my cock. Yes! I thought. So I just get the best blow job of my life, I shit you not. Was PERFECT!

Well, she obviously wanted some return action. She spun around and pulled down her pretty pink panties, right after she finished telling me how she loved anal. Now, I've never had anal before so I was really stoked. She actually had to tell me exactly what to do, but that's a different story for a different day.

So she's screaming like a little bitch and I'm still stoked that I'm tapping some ass. After the thrill shock passed through me, I realized my balls were slapping something really strange. I just ignored it, figured I was having too much fun to really care what they were slapping against. Another couple minutes passed and I started getting curious...

I pulled out so I could see what I was slapping. And Holy fuck! There was a fully erect 6 inch penis fully intact with two sweaty balls! Just imagine the bitch scream I let out after that! I just fucked a guy! An IT!

She, he, it, whatever... wanted to know what the problem was. What the fuck! Take a guess there Rupaul! Needless to say, I dashed out of there like you've never seen and never looked back.

I'll never look at a tranny the same way again...

On a good note, anal sex is now my favorite position.

I'm gonna use that story on an OxCash gallery, thanks.

Ah, the wonders of alcohol - Is there anything that it can't do?


:glugglug

I keep telling you guys

BEWARE OF TRANNIES!!!!!!

i saw a dude get his skulled cracked open with a fist full of d batteries

That's the kinda shit that leads to recurring nightmares!

:repuke

too many things to single anything out.

i saw a guy dump some pop cans in a empty pillow case and beat a guy near to death...or wait...did i see that somewhere else?

They say if you'll pitch, you'll catch? True?:winkwink:

I've clicked on too many of Labret's links....:helpme

:Kissmy :zzwhip

Yeah Fucking Trannies!
:winkwink:

DH

Saw a guy who wanted to kill himself walking in the streets with open wrists...there was blood everywhere... pretty gross..

During a thunderstorm, lightning hit a transformer about two blocks from my house. The sparks set the chemical tanks outside the wool warehouse at the end of the block on fire, and from there, the fire spread to the warehouse itself. Lanolin (the oil in wool when it's freshly sheared) burns pretty good.

We heard the crash and sizzle of the transformer, and then my husband got called in to the hospital to work on a guy whose van had been passing by the transformer -- he crashed it. So me and my daughter are alone in the house when we start hearing these massive BOOM -- BOOM -- BOOM noises, spaced 15 seconds or so apart.

It was the chemical tanks exploding.

I tried to call the hospital to see what was going on, but the phone lines were down and the power was out. This is what I saw when I went outside and stood at the end of my driveway: a solid sheet of flame, from the ground all the way up to the treetops, just a fucking wall of fire three blocks down from my house. I could feel the heat, see the flames shoot up higher when another tank exploded, hear sirens and screaming...it was terrifying.

I ran back into the house, tried to stay calm and keep my daughter calm. I gathered up my purse and some other stuff -- the kind of things you grab to save from a burning house, like birth certificates and shit. I didn't have a car, so I was wondering what the fuck to do...every few minutes I would go out to the driveway and make sure nothing closer to us was on fire. The last time I was outside, a cop car crawled down the block, and a cop with a bullhorn announced that they were evacuating the neighborhood. We had to leave.

My daughter and I walked down to a neighbor's house several blocks away, and her husband gave us a ride to the hospital where my husband worked. While we were there I started to feel sick, and the nurses made me go upstairs and get treated for smoke inhalation and because I was exposed to the burning chemicals. (My daughter was okay, it was just my dumb ass going outside that close to the fire that got sick.)

So I spent a couple of hours breathing oxygen and getting IV fluids, and my daughter watched TV and worried about the kitties we'd had to leave at home. By the time they released me, my husband was off his shift, the fire was out, and our neighborhood was cleared. Our house didn't get damaged, but some firemen and workers at the warehouse got burned, and the warehouse itself looked like it got bombed. After that it took about 2 days to get the power back on.

So that is my "fucked up things I've seen" story.

Least I'll know who to come after for copyright infringement...