Retired Cop moves to Alaska....
 

Dick had
been in Police work
for 25 years. Finally sick of the stress, he quits his job
and
buys 50 acres of
land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible.
He sees the postman once a week and gets
groceries once a
month. Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.

After six months or so
of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens it
and
a huge, bearded
man is standing there.

'Name's Cliff, your neighbour from forty
miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night. Thought you
might like to come at about 5:00....'

'Great', says Rick, 'after
six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you.'


As Cliff is leaving, he stops. 'Gotta warn you. Be some
drinking'.'

'Not a problem' says Rick.. 'After 25
years
in the business, I
can drink with the best of 'em'.

Again, the big man starts to leave
and stops. ' More 'n' likely gonna be some fighting' too.'

'Well, I
get along with people, I'll be all right! I'll be there. Thanks
again.'

'More'n likely be some wild sex, too,'

'Now that's
really not a problem' says Rick, warming to the idea. 'I've been all alone
for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the way, what should I
wear?'

'Don't much
matter. Just gonna be the two of
us.'

roflmao funny

lmao:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

great lol


.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh :thumbsup

I wasn't expecting the last line, good one :thumbsup:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

lol good one

hehee very good

Lol!!!!!

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh Shit that's funny. Better tell it to someone before I forget it. Thanks for the laughs :thumbsup

hehe :)

nice one :)

Joke is older than half the people on this board. Older than the OP for sure.

A man gets powerful lonely out in the wilderness... :1orglaugh

Okay, here's a quickie:

A young man walks into a bar in Alaska. After many drinks, he announces to the whole bar that he is proud to be a new Alaskan.

One of the old timers at the bar laughs at him and asks him if he has gone through the
"Ritual" yet. The lad asks what the "ritual" entails. The old timer says,"Well, to be an Alaskan, you have to kill a Polar Bear and fuck an Eskimo."

The young man says that he hasn't done either yet, so he and the old timer continue to drink heavily together and the old timer answers his questions about the "Ritual". Afterwards, the young man stands up and wobbles out of the bar drunk as can be.

About four hours later, he struggles back into the bar, all scratched and cut up. He summons all of his strength and shouts out "Where is this damn Eskimo I have to kill?"

ADG

hahaha....good one =)

buuuuuuhahahahahahahahaha

hahaha good one...

good one.

Very funny, thanks!

hahahaha that is funny

lol

great

:1orglaugh

must be exciting.. your first joke.

hint... usually the last line is unexpected


you'll enjoy jokes now that you know the secret.

Yea ive heard quite a few variations of this joke... but for sure a good one for first timers...

Aw, take it easy on him...

http://www.wineandcake.com/prodimg/JSLE21.JPG

I used to think that a punchline is what you stand in at parties. :Oh crap

ADG

:1orglaugh

maybe palin will be there

If Sarah Palin knocked on his door it would be hotter.

made for a real good morning laugh! Thanks!

wasn't expecting a joke. that was funny.

Yeah my buddy sent me that one. I thought it was pretty good too :)

lol! Nice!

Hahaha...nice ones!

That's great! lol

:1orglaugh solitude is bad :1orglaugh

indeed it is :thumbsup

lol :1orglaugh