What is your relationship with your dad?
 

I basically don't have one but he's still alive and today seeing my cousin berry is father just did a 360 on me. I am turning 40 this year and I think it's time I make some positive changes and put some effort in building a relationship with my old man.

Anyone else is distant from there father?

Put some effort NOW!...instead of putting effort in regret when he passes.
He's your DAD and that will never change.
Cheers and Bonne Chance

Non existent, my dad died 4 years ago.. Before that? Greatest relationship ever... I love and miss my old man like no other. My hero.

a little communiction sure can't hurt, good luck to you


(and I got a little confused when you wrote "berry" when you meant "bury", it made it look like your cousin's name was Berry)

Berry is jmanese for bury... ;-)

This songs pretty much sums it up

https://youtube.com/watch?v=PdZb2inh4YM

i hope to god u are not drinking tonite

Well Ijust got home and it's 10:40 right now no plans to go out as today was a long day.

This is my song I listen to all the time, makes me think of my dad.

It is never too late to try and build a relationship or friendship with him...hopefully it will be mutual.

My parents got divorced when I was 9 years old, I did see my dad on Sundays for a while until he got re-married and had another family...and moved further away. It seems like we have gotten more distant since it has become harder to see each other lately...everybody is busy. I should have been more of a pain in the ass to him growing up, since I never asked him for any money. His second family is living carefree in a beautiful home with a pool...and I am stuck in small apt. in the Bronx at the moment. He never gave my mom's any money either...so we struggled a lot. It made me strong and street smart though.

Feels like deja vue for me...

I never had one,I'd kick him in the nuts if I ever met him

I have a great relationship with my dad. My parents got divorced when I was 14, I lived with my mom till I was 17, but still got to see my dad all the time. When I was 17 I moved in with my dad. I've always had a great relationship with my dad. A couple years back my dad went in for a simple surgery and all of a sudden my dad was almost like a vegetable.

The docs said that they've tried everything to find out what was wrong and that they don't know what's wrong and that it didn't look good.. I got pissed off at the doctors and told them "You know, I'm not doctor or anything, but seeing as you operated in his head and sealed him up right after without doing the ONE important thing this is why he's the way he is".. Of course, they looked at me all puzzled.

This pissed me off so I followed by saying "Are you fucking retarded?? Where did you get your degree? He has fluid in his head that needs to be drained you idiot". They brushed it off like I was an idiot so I made a call to the higher ups at the hospital, threatened legal action if a shunt was not put in my dad to drain the fluid. 1 day later I get 4 calls. 2 from the higher ups and 2 from the doctors and the next day what I told them to do was done.

Guess what happened? My dad slowly started to come back and eventually he was back.. Problem is, they wasted so much time that there was minor brain damage due to the pressure on teh brain due to the fluid, but I still made sure something was done. I wasn't gonna lose my dad because the doctors were fucking idiots.

Ok, this turned out longer than I wanted it to be, but yes, I have a great relationship with my dad.

My dad died when I was 13. He committed suicide and I found him dead in his trailer. I will never forget that day. He was genius as my mom told me. But he just could not deal with life and was schizophrenic. He loved music and could play any instrument as I remember. I used to play the banjo while he would sing. It made me a super strong person that could deal with anything. I went into the army as my dad did, became an MP and learned to work hard and live life like is you last day here! His favorite day was today the 4th.. We would set off fire works and run around with spriklers.

i haven't spoke to my father in 20 years. i don't really care if i ever do or not. i lived a few miles away from him and didn't talk to him.

people who love to say things like "he's still your father" or "you need to have a relationship before its too late" etc etc etc... have absolutely no idea what its like growing up and being physically abused and beaten day in and day out while growing up.... or what its like growing up in a constant state of terror or having to endure any similar type of BS etc and having to look into that persons eyes, knowing that the one person who was supposed to protect you at any cost was the one person who made your life a living nightmare.

for all you people saying "you should, or you'll regret it one day" might want to stop and consider that you are most often spouting that shit to people who were molested or saw family members molested or who were beaten constantly or whatever. you have NO right to start telling people who relationship they should have with toxic, abusive and even dangerous personalities in their lives.


jmho

You seem to remember really good stuff about your Dad and kept part of him alive threw you... that's awesome.

I just feel that turning 40 and He's 66, not much time left... Today's funeral was a major factor to a turning point in my life that will start now. I will stop resenting my dad for what he did and start living my life WITH him.

Yngwie, that is an amazing story and thanks for sharing.

I have a better relationship with my father than my mother.. Me and my pops have really grown when it comes to seeing things from both our sides over the past few years, I love it.

Don't listen to others, go with your feeling... I did not talk to my dad as I resented him for what he made my mom go threw. He never touched me or abused me. My relationship changed when he paid more attention to his own life then be there when it was time to teach a kid how to be a man... He was to busy fucking chicks all over the place and making my mother miserable.

Now he's old and I am pretty sure he considers himself lucky to have a new companion as he'd pretty much be wanking alone in the dark if she was not there.

Me wanting a new start with my old man will never change what I think of him for what he did to my mother but I preach to not live in the past so maybe it's time to practice that with him. I just want to make it happen because that is what my gutt as been telling me since I left the funeral today and drove 2 hours back to Montreal.

Call him now and tell him who you are, and how thankful you are. Also say you love him. Life is too short to wait until tomorrow to do anything. I never go to bed mad and take life as it is given to me. Everything happens for a reason. Always be positive and live like it is your last day!

I lost my father thanksgiving of 2008 and I miss him so much. He wasnt just my father ,he was my best friend.

other than the ones that took direct abuse from their fathers, I think we should always remember that we might not have the whole story or perspective when we judge someone

Have not spoken to him in at least a dozen years and it's going to stay that way.

:Oh crap

yes but on different way

He's been dead for almost 24 years now, but I still think about him and miss him everyday. He was the perfect dad, nothing was ever too much, and he showed me the world on our overseas trips which opened my eyes to other cultures and it also helped to shape me into the person (and father) I am today.

Never met the fucker. Apparently he was a married neighbor of my mom's. lol.

:1orglaugh good one! :thumbsup

[QUOTE=Anyone else is distant from there father?[/QUOTE]

Yep a lot of distant :warning

I barely remember my dad. He commited suicide when I was 7.
All I really remember about it was one day I was in my room reading and my mom's friend opens the door and tells me my mom wants to see me in the living room and I remember being really confused and thinking to myself "when did she get here? and why doesn't my mom just come get me herself.". So, I followed her out there and was sat on the couch in front of my mom who was crying (which confused me even more). Then, in breaths between tears, my mom told me that my dad was dead. And I'm not sure if it just didn't sink in or what, but I just said ok and asked if I could go back to my room. I did, and just continued where I left off in my book, never batting an eye.

you mean 180?