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-   -   Man who left nine kids under safe haven law expecting child (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=913405)

Vicious_B 06-30-2009 06:56 AM

Man who left nine kids under safe haven law expecting child
 
I cannot imagine how his children must feel about this. :mad:

Gary Staton said he had lost the will to be a parent after his wife died.

Now, the man who dropped off his nine kids under Nebraska's safe haven law is going to be a father again.

Staton, 37, and his girlfriend are expecting a baby.

The couple declined last week to discuss the pregnancy, calling it a private matter. But Staton addressed the matter briefly in an e-mail to The World-Herald.

"Do you think I'm going to raise this one alone?" he asked.

Since the Staton children were young, the family has received $995,468 in different forms of government aid, including more than $600,000 in food stamps and $109,774 in Medicaid, according to Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services records.

The children were placed in foster care after their father left them. Under the latest figures available, the state paid an average $725 a month per child to foster parents in similar situations.

Staton has given up custody of his seven youngest children. They remain in foster care with their mother's aunt, who hopes to adopt them. The two oldest boys were in foster care until last month, when a 75-year-old Omaha woman was approved to be their guardian.

Both women are eligible for adoption and guardianship subsidies. Parents who adopt state wards may apply to receive Medicaid health insurance and a monthly maximum subsidy of $1,490 per child until the child turns 18.

After Staton's newest child is born, the state cannot remove it from his custody unless there is evidence that the child is in danger, said Brenda Beadle, Douglas County chief deputy county attorney.

Tom Incontro, an Omaha attorney appointed to advocate for the Staton children and who has known the family for years, said he was worried about how the children would react to their father's news and how it would affect them in later years.

Despite the extreme adversity they have faced, the kids remain close and supportive of one another, Incontro said.

"They have each other to lean on, and I believe they will continue to do so," Incontro said. "Hopefully this is one more challenge they will deal with and keep moving forward in their lives."

Staton became the single father of 10 kids - ages 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 9, 8, 5, 4 and 1 month - in February 2007 when his wife, RebelJane, died after suffering a cerebral aneurysm. The oldest child was his wife's daughter from a previous relationship that he had raised as his own.

Without his wife, Gary Staton said, the amount of work involved and the stress of raising the kids on $10.75 an hour wages were too much to handle.

"I was 100 percent sure that I couldn't last much longer doing this routine over and over, and I wanted to just walk away from it all," he said in March, when he granted interviews to The World-Herald to share his side of the story with the public.

Aside from his oldest daughter, he said, he did not ask for help from anyone in the family. He did not seek government assistance after losing his job in September.

That month, he told his kids - all but the oldest, who legally was an adult - he was taking them to Creighton University Medical Center for grief counseling. When they arrived, he notified hospital staff that he was invoking Nebraska's safe haven law, which allowed parents to leave their children without facing criminal prosecution.

At the time, the law had no age limit. The Legislature later limited it to newborns after 27 parents and guardians dropped off kids.

State workers who spoke to the Staton kids soon after they were dropped off found them to be polite and well-mannered. Although a few were a little behind in school, most of the others were excelling.

In later interviews, Staton said he was not haunted by his decision.

He said he still loved his children. "I'm just so worried about trying again and failing."

At the time, Staton said he did not want more children and would be willing to take steps to make sure he couldn't father any more.

"If I had a thousand dollars," he said, "I'd get fixed."

http://www.kearneyhub.com/site/news....d=577571&rfi=6

lulu36 06-30-2009 06:58 AM

someone give that man a thousand dollars please!

SoloGirlsContent 06-30-2009 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lulu36 (Post 16014090)
someone give that man a thousand dollars please!

just give that fucker a pair of scissors instead, what a fucking loser

Choopa Phil 06-30-2009 07:20 AM

that guy is merely a bag of excuses its not THAT hard to get a job that pays more than 10 an hour. hell i got more when i worked at home depot when i was 18. im a total loss right now for how i feel about this d-bag

IllTestYourGirls 06-30-2009 07:42 AM

End welfare and you would end most of this bullshit.

MaDalton 06-30-2009 07:44 AM

castration would help

Vicious_B 06-30-2009 07:48 AM

I don't understand how any parent could raise a child for as long as he did with most of them. To have fathered them with someone he claimed to have loved so much and then just drop them off and never look back. From what I understood from the article he didn't apply for any assistance or ask family members for help after his wife died just said I can't handle this and dumped off his kids.

Quote:

Staton became the single father of 10 kids - ages 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 9, 8, 5, 4 and 1 month - in February 2007 when his wife, RebelJane, died after suffering a cerebral aneurysm.
With the exception of the youngest of course most of those kids could have stepped up and helped their father with their family if given the chance instead of shuffled off to foster homes.

Its just disgusting that the man had resources available to him and he just blew off his family.

SmokeyTheBear 06-30-2009 08:01 AM

alot of critics here. I'll take a shot in the dark that none of them has ever had 10 kids :)

having 10 kids is pretty unusual and obviously very very hard to take care of. Anyone who thinks they wouldnt snap at some point is dreaming. Especially after losing your wife to top it off.

I can imagine after having 10 kids and then none that you would feel awfully lonely, hence the newest child. Maybe the state should have bought him some counseling.

SmokeyTheBear 06-30-2009 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014193)
I don't understand how any parent could raise a child for as long as he did with most of them. To have fathered them with someone he claimed to have loved so much and then just drop them off and never look back. From what I understood from the article he didn't apply for any assistance or ask family members for help after his wife died just said I can't handle this and dumped off his kids.

10 kids is a bit of a unique situation. If you are a parent you must want what is best for your children, thats why so many women choose adoption, not because they dont have the ability or love , but because they realise the children could have a better life.

TisMe 06-30-2009 08:14 AM

He made a choice, one which ensured that his children would be well cared for.

Compare that to all the abuse and neglect that goes on and seems like he did the right thing to me.

It was cruel and tough, but at least he thought about the children.

GrouchyAdmin 06-30-2009 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TisMe (Post 16014254)
It was cruel and tough, but at least he thought about the children.

Oh yeah. Not learning to pull out and giving his responsibility to others to deal with makes him truly a saint.

Tom_PM 06-30-2009 08:19 AM

He claims that if he had a thousand dollars he would get fixed.

You can sense the lie from across all the internets.

baddog 06-30-2009 08:37 AM

As the eldest of 12 I can't say that I blame him too much. Actually blame the state for making it so easy for him.

Vicious_B 06-30-2009 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear (Post 16014237)
10 kids is a bit of a unique situation. If you are a parent you must want what is best for your children, thats why so many women choose adoption, not because they dont have the ability or love , but because they realise the children could have a better life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TisMe (Post 16014254)
He made a choice, one which ensured that his children would be well cared for.

Compare that to all the abuse and neglect that goes on and seems like he did the right thing to me.

It was cruel and tough, but at least he thought about the children.

I would have had more respect for his decision if he had at least attempted to take care of them before dumping them off. There are plenty of people in this world that are widowed with families, some large families. Many don't have family or resources available to them and they still keep their families together. Again it would also be more understandable if they were all really young children. A child 10 and above is very capable of contributing to the family by helping.

And if it was a selfless sacrifice to help his children why didn't he ensure that he didn't get someone else pregnant. Why also when he entered into a new relationship and could be a 2 parent household he didn't attempt to reclaim at least some of his children.

From his own mouth
Quote:

"Do you think I'm going to raise this one alone?" he asked.
That's pretty sad. So god forbid something happens to this one it would be okay for him to dump yet another kid on the state?

Scott McD 06-30-2009 08:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllTestYourGirls (Post 16014183)
End welfare and you would end most of this bullshit.

Yup... :2 cents:

Deesnuts 06-30-2009 08:45 AM

what an asshole

AmeliaG 06-30-2009 08:56 AM

Condoms are totally affordable even working part time at $10.75 an hour.

I think it would be difficult to raise one child on $10.75 an hour, so, even if he and his deceased wife both worked, I don't get how he thinks he can claim the math used to make sense for nine children. I feel so so sorry for his children and horrified that those are the genes and values getting passed on in largest percentage.

The idea of a social safety net is to prevent avoidable tragedy and someone like this guy who abuses the system is likely to be the cause of those social safety nets being removed for people who actually need them.

Iron Fist 06-30-2009 08:59 AM

See... that's what happens when you raise a generation who thinks hitting the reset button is not cheating.

TheDoc 06-30-2009 09:04 AM

Well, at least he didn't kill them.

INDY500DRIVER 06-30-2009 09:21 AM

Ruined my day, lousy piece of shit...

LexiLexxx 06-30-2009 09:32 AM

Wow, he is pretty young to have all those kids!

The state should pay for his vasectomy, to save alot of $$. I love kids, but that's just way to many in todays world.

StaceyJo 06-30-2009 09:43 AM

He just hand over his responsibilities to others.

SmokeyTheBear 06-30-2009 09:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014359)
I would have had more respect for his decision if he had at least attempted to take care of them before dumping them off.

i thought he did.. didnt she die in 2007
Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014359)
There are plenty of people in this world that are widowed with families, some large families. Many don't have family or resources available to them and they still keep their families together.

single men with no help and 10 kids ? i doubt there are very many.


Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014359)
And if it was a selfless sacrifice to help his children why didn't he ensure that he didn't get someone else pregnant. Why also when he entered into a new relationship and could be a 2 parent household he didn't attempt to reclaim at least some of his children.

well i dont know the background but i would assume with 10 kids and 0 free time he prob felt helpless to ever find a mom for the kids and raise them properly. Once he had no kids and found a girlfriend, he now has the ability to care for a child. Now why he didnt just try and re-adopt his own kids is unknown but there are alot of dynamics involved.

DaddyHalbucks 06-30-2009 10:15 AM

Welfare is what destroyed our productivity and economy.

who 06-30-2009 10:18 AM

Obviously the sterility compounds in the state water ain't workin.

DaddyHalbucks 06-30-2009 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014075)

"If I had a thousand dollars," he said, "I'd get fixed."

http://www.kearneyhub.com/site/news....d=577571&rfi=6

I'm in for $100. Can we get nine others to do the same?

I insist on escrow, the guy does not get a dime until he can prove to us he got fixed.

Vicious_B 06-30-2009 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear (Post 16014629)
i thought he did.. didnt she die in 2007


single men with no help and 10 kids ? i doubt there are very many.




well i dont know the background but i would assume with 10 kids and 0 free time he prob felt helpless to ever find a mom for the kids and raise them properly. Once he had no kids and found a girlfriend, he now has the ability to care for a child. Now why he didnt just try and re-adopt his own kids is unknown but there are alot of dynamics involved.

Upon re reading the article I do see that you are right. I also see where it says he asked no family members for help or asked for government assistance. I have to wonder why? Wouldn't keeping your family together be more important than pride at that point?

Obviously he had the help available to him:

Quote:

Staton has given up custody of his seven youngest children. They remain in foster care with their mother's aunt, who hopes to adopt them. The two oldest boys were in foster care until last month, when a 75-year-old Omaha woman was approved to be their guardian.
If the mothers aunt is willing to foster the 5 youngest herself I would hazard a guess that she would have been willing to help him out.

Quote:

Since the Staton children were young, the family has received $995,468 in different forms of government aid, including more than $600,000 in food stamps and $109,774 in Medicaid, according to Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services records.
The father apparently had no problem accepting government assistance when his wife was alive.

And this to me is the kicker:

Quote:

That month, he told his kids - all but the oldest, who legally was an adult - he was taking them to Creighton University Medical Center for grief counseling. When they arrived, he notified hospital staff that he was invoking Nebraska's safe haven law, which allowed parents to leave their children without facing criminal prosecution.
How do you make the decision to give up your kids and not even warn them or talk to them about your decision? You lie to them and then dump them without warning. I would be real curious to find out how much visitation or contact he has had with them since he gave them up.

TisMe 06-30-2009 12:05 PM

Being a father I can't fathom the decision to give up your child.

But at least he did it in a way that ensured they were taken care of.

Compared to the horror stories about abandoned and neglected kids I'd rather see what he did happen.

seeandsee 06-30-2009 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 12clicksMichele (Post 16014075)
I cannot imagine how his children must feel about this. :mad:

Gary Staton said he had lost the will to be a parent after his wife died.

Now, the man who dropped off his nine kids under Nebraska's safe haven law is going to be a father again.

Staton, 37, and his girlfriend are expecting a baby.

The couple declined last week to discuss the pregnancy, calling it a private matter. But Staton addressed the matter briefly in an e-mail to The World-Herald.

"Do you think I'm going to raise this one alone?" he asked.

Since the Staton children were young, the family has received $995,468 in different forms of government aid, including more than $600,000 in food stamps and $109,774 in Medicaid, according to Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services records.

The children were placed in foster care after their father left them. Under the latest figures available, the state paid an average $725 a month per child to foster parents in similar situations.

Staton has given up custody of his seven youngest children. They remain in foster care with their mother's aunt, who hopes to adopt them. The two oldest boys were in foster care until last month, when a 75-year-old Omaha woman was approved to be their guardian.

Both women are eligible for adoption and guardianship subsidies. Parents who adopt state wards may apply to receive Medicaid health insurance and a monthly maximum subsidy of $1,490 per child until the child turns 18.

After Staton's newest child is born, the state cannot remove it from his custody unless there is evidence that the child is in danger, said Brenda Beadle, Douglas County chief deputy county attorney.

Tom Incontro, an Omaha attorney appointed to advocate for the Staton children and who has known the family for years, said he was worried about how the children would react to their father's news and how it would affect them in later years.

Despite the extreme adversity they have faced, the kids remain close and supportive of one another, Incontro said.

"They have each other to lean on, and I believe they will continue to do so," Incontro said. "Hopefully this is one more challenge they will deal with and keep moving forward in their lives."

Staton became the single father of 10 kids - ages 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 9, 8, 5, 4 and 1 month - in February 2007 when his wife, RebelJane, died after suffering a cerebral aneurysm. The oldest child was his wife's daughter from a previous relationship that he had raised as his own.

Without his wife, Gary Staton said, the amount of work involved and the stress of raising the kids on $10.75 an hour wages were too much to handle.

"I was 100 percent sure that I couldn't last much longer doing this routine over and over, and I wanted to just walk away from it all," he said in March, when he granted interviews to The World-Herald to share his side of the story with the public.

Aside from his oldest daughter, he said, he did not ask for help from anyone in the family. He did not seek government assistance after losing his job in September.

That month, he told his kids - all but the oldest, who legally was an adult - he was taking them to Creighton University Medical Center for grief counseling. When they arrived, he notified hospital staff that he was invoking Nebraska's safe haven law, which allowed parents to leave their children without facing criminal prosecution.

At the time, the law had no age limit. The Legislature later limited it to newborns after 27 parents and guardians dropped off kids.

State workers who spoke to the Staton kids soon after they were dropped off found them to be polite and well-mannered. Although a few were a little behind in school, most of the others were excelling.

In later interviews, Staton said he was not haunted by his decision.

He said he still loved his children. "I'm just so worried about trying again and failing."

At the time, Staton said he did not want more children and would be willing to take steps to make sure he couldn't father any more.

"If I had a thousand dollars," he said, "I'd get fixed."

http://www.kearneyhub.com/site/news....d=577571&rfi=6

kill the fucker

who 06-30-2009 12:53 PM

I wish Baddog had died sooner

$5 submissions 06-30-2009 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear (Post 16014219)
Maybe the state should have bought him some counseling.

:2 cents:

art914 06-30-2009 04:16 PM

first, it was a mistake to have that many kids to begin with, especially when you cant afford to have kids

second, while i dont think it's right to give up your children, i think he did the right thing by giving them up to the state rather than to neglect them or abuse them in some sick way.

brassmonkey 06-30-2009 04:26 PM

bad deal

Young 06-30-2009 04:29 PM

must be a white guy.

black guys choose not to get involved from the beginning.

white guys stick around until shit hits the fan or something better rolls along.

$5 submissions 06-30-2009 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaddyHalbucks (Post 16014684)
Welfare is what destroyed our productivity and economy.

Is it "welfare" or the mentality/assumptions it enables/frees from normal consequences?

AtlantisCash 06-30-2009 07:57 PM

anyone produces children more then enough should not be allowed to live between normal people.

since havving a one child even a great responsibility how those sick fuckers can think that they may take care all off those children?


i dearly hope such strickt laws coming some days for whole World like in China :mad:

sortie 06-30-2009 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Young (Post 16016220)
must be a white guy.

black guys choose not to get involved from the beginning.

white guys stick around until shit hits the fan or something better rolls along.

Damn! And this thread was so close to delivering without the race thing.

:1orglaugh


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