So my daughter punched a boy in the face today...
 

she is 8, getting teased by a boy-the usually 3rd grade stuff.

my daughter said she 'used her words' to handle the situation --didn't work so she hauled off and punched him in the mouth.

(I tried not to laugh at the visual in this serious conversation.)

She got in trouble at school. Said she was tired, missed me and said she is aware she 'did not handle her impulse reactions properly.'

But now asks me if she is 'grounded'.

hmmm....

They start out with their fists and then move to rolling pins and frying pans later on in life :(

Oh, the adrenaline of childhood fights..

Canwegoback?

Tell her that kicks to the groin are a much more effective way of bringing boys down.

My daughter, 7, takes Karate right now so she doesn't have to punch boys in the mouth... so far so good.

Don't be surprised if cops get involved. Weird shit out there.

teach her a left hook they never see that punch coming! i used to drop every fucking kid in school with that punch and thats how i grew up to be such a BIG INTERNET TOUGH GUY :warning

:2 cents::2 cents:

bullys deserve that punch in the mouth :)

Did the vice principal at least give her some water?

aww just like her mommy. :D

The rule at our house was that you could fight at school if someone hit you first, threatened you, or tried to damage or steal your belongings. And knee-meets-balls was the first thing my dad taught me!

give her a hundred dollar bill

LMAO, the principal now resigned, the Vice principal's ass got saved and moved into the position, and she brings a bottle of water to school, but thanks for remembering the previous threads. ;)

LOL, yea huh, except that my punch is invisible. LOL :upsidedow

She really said she is aware she 'did not handle her impulse reactions properly.'

Psshhh....that's a fancy vocabulary your 8 year old has.

I would analyze the situation and administer a punishment accordingly (or none depending on the situation).....

she said "did not handle her impulse reactions properly" in those words? And she is 8? You have a smart kid :)

she joined the fight club

thanks for the laugh :)

if she does a few times more, then it might be a bit of a problem, but as for this time I think she did what quite a lot of normal kids would do in her situation.

yes, she really said that. I teach her as much as I can how to handle situations as they arise so she knows for the next time a similar situation happens.

So she may not have applied what I taught her about assessing a situation before enacting on it, but she was aware the same day that she did not do it. So that is cool. She is aware of her actions in the present. :)

I also asked her why she did it other than being teased, she said 'I was tired and I missed you and so all of it together my fist just had a reaction and acted out what I was feeling'.
how is that for more awareness. Heck, she is my teacher a lot too for sure. :thumbsup

After reading what you wrote and that those were her actual words, yes ground her and then some. Especially since grounding her will not be a real punishment. I would say make her find people to do free labor for and sentence her to at least 30 hours community service.

Also be prepared to get sued just for shits and giggles. Small claims is more than likely in both or your futures since so many people are lawsuit happy and their child is the center and ruler of the universe.

When my mum grounded me I didnt bother coz I would just stay home home and bug her till she eventually let me back out.

Punish her in another way but be clear she is being punished for her action not for standing up for herself. Everyone should be able to stand up for themselves but perhaps dealing with it in a different manner would suffice.

no, she is growing into a strong woman, never take shit from ANYONE in this world.

i think this stuff though is she is learning also how to play you into mush in her hands, sounds like a very smart kid.

I totally agree. That is how this came about, standing up for herself from conversations in past. But you are right, when and how to deal with standing up for yourself is just as important as doing it. thanks!

Ah hmmm, perhaps...but since I am the one who teaches her, I know she is using those skills on me as well--so I'll let her work me, but she has to earn the win. Not just to be right and justified all the time, but by her deducing her reasoning is where the real win comes in. So therein is the real goal of mine, her learning deeper, obvious to her or not :winkwink:


LOL, nothing like watching a mini me in action. :upsidedow

thanks for the post!

ps- I didn't ground her in the end because she was aware of her actions and understood she was 'projecting' her bottled up feelings onto one person who had not much to do with it but took the hit.. it wasn't right, but it was honest.

I must say, talking with my 8 year old is one heck of a trip!

yeah fist are good but heavy objects do the job faster:helpme

i think this is a byproduct of developing chutzpah

from this i would guess you never had a fight at school? man, if that would apply i would have been very busy with community service and my parents very poor from paying for me. i don't doubt that there are kids that need a lesson, mostly those that play WOW after school and have no other social life. but all this, including a fight here and there, is called LIFE and you learn from it. like the boy has now learned that he can't make fun of a girl without consequences. (he will probably later in his life sign up to many femdom sites and make someone here lots of money :winkwink:)

i think he's actually physically disabled if my memory serves me right :2 cents:

she taught him a lesson, don't punish her by trying to teach her one.

actually i know that and it was kind of a rhetorical question. but what wondered me was how things like "community service" and "small claims" could be associated with a little school kids fight of 8 year olds. what has this world come to, it makes me shake my head. when i came home and had bruises from some fight my parents told me to either run faster or fight better. or use my brain and mouth to avoid it. the last one worked the best

bet that boy doesn't mess with her anymore. :)

That was not 2009 in California. :2 cents:

She stood up to a bully = Should not be punished...

tease = bully now?

insightful on that comment hon.

regardless of wherever she goes, it is standing up, just the right way. But that is what learning is all about. I still learn everyday...

but excellent note about California and environment aspect of this topic!! thanks.

No weapons= fair fight...

I'm for no grounding.

ha...8 yrs old is too young to get in trouble

sounds like she knows already that hitting someone is not appropriate behaviour

good job lori:)

She should not be punished.

I would have handled it the same way. Sounds to me like your daughter has a very good head on her shoulders. Good job!

no, but isn't that sad somehow that kids are not allowed to be kids anymore and already have to have legal consequences in mind?

I don't know how to read you, so you can apply the following answer if you feel like it.

It is sad that kids have to wear helmets on bicycles and feel that dodge ball is too violent as well, but that isn't the point. I am talking reality through experience.

I have listened to a prosecutor discuss filing charges against a pre-school boy for kissing her pre-school daughter. I am sure she would have no problem filing criminal charges for battery if the parents raised enough of a stink.

Awwww. She needs ice cream!

It was around this age that I learned that girls were just as bad as boys, and adults/teachers were just as likely to be stupid as children. And that my greatest hero was my mother.

I got detention one day because a girl shoved a boy off the high bar and he got hurt, and since I was standing nearby and a boy, and since girls "dont do things like that", the teacher let the girl go (who turned and laughed), and I got punished.

When my mother found out about it, she marched into that school and was gone for a good 15 or 20 minutes and for the entire rest of the school year, the teacher never called on me and barely looked at me.

Anyway, I think you should probably discover what was actually "done". Was it just him saying she had cooties? Then a reaction of punching is way out of line with the crime etc. If he was yanking her hair out of her head, well ok then probably. Good luck.

Which is the whole point of the thread. I bet he is glad you said that. Just another parent bragging about how intelligent their kid is. I predict she will make an appearance on dumbsluts.com in 10 years time.

ouch :1orglaugh:1orglaugh

yea sometimes I am not sure what the best way to handle each of her experiences so I try to let her express them before I react. Heck, sometimes I don't even handle my own in certain moments. LOL thanks for the post!

noted. not applicable in the context of this conversation, but I can see how you may have come to that conclusion.

If I was looking for only accolades, I would not have posted on GFY. I posted here because of the variety of opinions. including yours. thanks.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:thumbsup