Just give me my money
 

Just got back from the bank and the teller was a prying little bitch. Just wondering what everyone tells their bankers what they do. She kept asking me if this was my employer. I responded with 'I will be depositing cheques on a weekely basis'.


I am in Canada and she told me that she wanted to put a 21 business day hold on my cheque. She said 'We are dealing with another country here'. It's not like the cheque is coming from a third world country. Bitch.

Just give me my money

dude, you'r lucky its 21 days.
I have to wait 3 months to cash a check.

I argued with the lady and I got it down to 5 days.

If the pry, tell them you do computer programing for a multi million dollar corporation, on a contract basis! Very easy explanation,and then you dont seem like you are hiding anything :2 cents:

"She said 'We are dealing with another country here'. It's not like the cheque is coming from a third world country. Bitch. "

... welcome to the real world.

"I argued with the lady and I got it down to 5 days."

... I don´t believe this. which bank ??

Do you want my banking info too?

I deposited a cheque the week before thru a different teller and the dude only put a 5 day hold on it. So i told her this and she agreed.

Two words: wire transfer

Money goes into your account immediately and you never need to speak to a nosy bank teller again.

I remember once years ago, I didn't have a credit card and I was buying content. I went to the bank to get a money order. The name of the content company was something like Digimedia Solutions. The bank teller was going through the process of making up the money order and she asks me "are you buying some software?" I said "yes" just to make her happy, but the truth is I was buying dirty pornography of girls getting fucked in the ass and then swallowing cum. I should have told her the truth, and said it really loud so everyone could hear. Maybe then the bitch would learn not to ask questions to things that don't matter, just give me the fuckin money order and shut-up!

Who gives a rats ass what the teller thinks??...what are you embarassed about what you do??...As long as your sites are legal, then whats the big deal???...Tell the bitch you run some interner Adult Entertainment companies. Also if shes cute you could get her to model if your slick enough:winkwink:

When I started depositing my US cheques, I don't think the tellers knew their was a 30 day hold. So I was lucky enough to never have one.

A year later a new teller told me there was a 30 day hold on cheques. I said, "I don't think so. You've never held my money before, and I don't expect you to hold it now."

She went to talk the manager. The manager and I had a 10 minute meeting and she informed me that if one of the cheques bounced, they'd call me and I'd have to replace the money. DUH.

So I deposit my money and take it out whenever I want.

The thing that pisses me off is this. Say you have a US cheque for $3000 and they give you $4500 CDN. Come back an hour later with the same $4500 CDN and buy US funds and they'll give you $2950 USD.

If they don't get you one way, they'll get you another.

P.S. I have fun with the tellers though. After they total up all the cheques and tell me what my deposit will be, I point to the "clearly stated" U.S. funds and make them do it again.

The cost to mail me my cheques- $2.00 US
The cost for service charges- $50
The look on a tellers face when you tell her how you make this money- Priceless

I get my money on the spot and no need to deposit my check. If I wanted I could evade taxes. I have known my nice bankteller for years and if there is a problem she knows it will be covered :thumbsup

so I will not change bank in this century!

Do you know what happens to your bank's attitude towards you when they find out your business is porn? They want nothing to do with you. Not much fun.

There was a thread on here a few months ago started by BradShaw about his bank disowning his business because they're in porn.

Haha...banks are the worst...my bank tried putting holds on my US checks a while back as well...I managed to convince them otherwise though.

First I tried the simple:

"Well I've been depositing US checks for nearly five years now, and I've never had one returned on me"

...didn't work...apparently past banking history and a kickass credit history isn't good enough

"If the check bounces, I'm the one stuck with the bill so why do you care?"

...then they changed their position to the fact it was "for my protection"

After a few hours (yes hours...I must have spoken to four different people) of listening to their bullshitting I finally just said fuck it, drove for an hour and a half to the branch and spoke with the manager...she tried giving me the same bullshit as well.

She then tried compromising as I wouldn't take no for an answer...

first she said she'd allow checks to be cashed if I put my RRSP up as collateral (which btw is technically illegal...RRSPs cannot be used as security). Then she tried to get me to tie in some GICs and use them for collateral.

Finally the agreement we came up with was a limit on the checks...any check > $3500 has the 21 day hold on it....anything under that is withdrawable immediately for me.

Summed up....setup a meeting with the bank's branch manager and make sure he/she understands that the money is your lifesource....bills won't wait 21 business days to be paid so why should you? If you suggest something similar to what I got with a capped maximum on a insta-cleared check something could probably be worked out. Don't deal with anyone but the branch manager though, anyone else has to follow policy and would need the manager to clear it anyways...so skip the middleman.

Well your at the wrong bank then..:Graucho Who cares about their attitudes, Like I said before, if your business is Legal, who gives a rat's ass about their attitudes??......Grow up, if you have to hide what you do, then maybe it's time to do something else???:Graucho

Hmmm... we're in Germany and it takes 5 days maximum until the money is in our account... been like that since 97. Fees are not that bad either, it's all negotiable :)

Who cares about your banks attitudes? I do.

Not caring about your banks attitude is like saying who cares about Visa's attitude?

I don't have to hide what I do. It just makes it a little easier dealing with a bank if they don't know that I make money from selling pictures and videos of hardcore sex. And I don't think my bank really wants to know anyways, it's an unspoken don't ask don't tell policy.

used to deposite checks before, now it's all wire baby ! :Graucho

Hey dude ! it's just money :2 cents:

I get letters from the bank on an almost weekly basis telling me they're placing a hold on my account for X$$ for 3 or 5 days or whatever.
And 95% of my checks are drawn from US Banks. I don't know what the deal is unless its the amount of the deposits that sets off a red flag. (I never got letters like that when I was a newbie making a few hundred a month...LOL)

When the bank teller says "what do you do?" I say "I mind my own fucking business" :1orglaugh

I always get "have you thought about investing? would you like me to set you up an appointment with a financial investor, its never too early to start investing" blah blah

same bitch over and over again, it must be programmed into there heads


one teller asked me once, I just said "ebay"

Back when I was depositing checks instead of getting wire transfers a teller asked me stuff I didn't feel like answering.

Teller: "what do you do?"

Me: "does it matter?"

Teller: "no"

Me: "then why ask me?"

Teller: "I was just curious"

Me: "is it standard procedure to question every client about their personal business?"

Teller: "no"

Me: "then don't ask"

Im in canada too and when i deposit checks, there no hold.... well not yet, you bastards better not put a curse on me... also it prolly depends on the amount, im not cashing thousands or anything

I bank at the Royal and it basically works like this:

If you have enough in your account to cover it, you're ok.

If you have the "priviledged" account like I do, you get a freebie $1500 in unconfirmed funds... Helps sometimes.

However, if they don't like the looks of you, they will still try to hold it sometimes. I'm an ornery bastard and don't let them get away with it, but it's annoying. It's about human relationships most of the time - if they don't know you they'll hold..

PS - 25 days is fucking ridiculous. What, are they sending that signature down on the Pony Express? It's the fucking 21st century.

Cheers,
Backov

I usually save all of mine up for a couple of months and go down to the corner store and cash them all out at once for a six pac of beer.

I had a great thing going with my bank a couple of years ago, I used to be able to bank checks for no cost and there was no hold period at all (Usually this is unheard of in Australia). But as soon as I had a bounced check for 30k from Maxcash (which wasn't Maxcash's fault, it was the FTC's) they put a fucking 28 day hold on my checks, charged a fee to bank every check and they turned their nose down at us every time we went to bank there :feels-hot. I soon left that bank cancelled everything I had there, and now I get only wire transfers and put up with the "would you like to speak to a financial investor" sometimes when I go in there....

lol

LMAO....thats classic, I love it:thumbsup

I got them to waive the hold on my cheques :thumbsup

I dont have any holds or fees for my checks.

Amerrrrrrrrrrica Amerrrrrrrrrrica....

Hmph!!! All my bank tellers are nosy also! I told them what I do, and they think it's great...a few even asked for jobs. I don't go in too often as my mother handles the billing and check deposits...but when I do, they always ask how business is :)

I ran into a problem recently cashing checks from Canadian banks. I do my banking at a credit union and have been there for over 9 years. Still, the woman there swears up and down that it's "credit union policy" to MAIL the damned check to Canada for some ridiculous reason. My end of it? A 5- to 10-day hold on funds and a $5 fee.

When this little scenario came up again the other day, I just looked at her and said, "Yanno, this is 2002, and I thought Canada was the good guys. The check clearly states in two different spots that it is US funds, yet you are STILL determined to make me jump through these hoops and wait 10 days for money that is mine? Haven't you ever heard of a computer? modem? telephone, for Christ's sake?"

She just kinda looked at me for a minute with this baffled look on her face, as if she had no idea WTF I was talking about, and replied, "Do you want me to call you when the funds are deposited?"

Never wanted to smack anybody so bad in my life :ak47:

I deal with a online bank and I don't have to wait in a line or go through a million questions. I just drop the checks in a overnight slip (that they pay for) send them off and the next day the funds are available. No holds or nothing. Best fucking bank I have ever used.

:ak47: Bank of America
:ak47: Wells Fargo
:ak47: US Bank