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-   -   Booty Call Check list (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=878093)

sortie 12-27-2008 06:40 PM

Booty Call Check list
 
New babe this time so I better check the list.

1. Liter bottle of booze and mix.....check!
2. Introductory sized bag of herbal supplement:winkwink:.....check!
3. Trojan-enz light blue box(never pull from super size box with new girl)....check!
4. Toliet seat down and inspected....check!
5. Clean bed sheet........ok half check! :1orglaugh
6. Incense burning.....check!
7. ICQ closed....check!
8. Full ice trays.....check!
9. A big Fuck You to all my haters....check!

To do :
10. Log off this password protected account and logon to guest acccount.....
11. Drive over and pick her up.....

And for number 12!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Copy my dogfart webmaster password to all their sites to my guest account just in case she likes porn.



See sig.....I've promoted it for 10 years and there's a damn good reason for that.

Later.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 12-27-2008 06:42 PM

http://www.decoratingideakidrooms.co...e%20scores.jpg

Good luck!!! :thumbsup

ADG

brassmonkey 12-27-2008 06:48 PM

dont forget to beat off the first load helps keep it solid

Spunky 12-27-2008 09:38 PM

12.Strap on dildo

sortie 12-28-2008 01:18 PM

Yep, that was a good one despite some low scores in certain areas.

I'll hit it again for sure.

Nice size naturals up front with reasonable rear cushion.

brassmonkey 12-28-2008 01:23 PM

well u had some wine so im guessing it raised the score

BusterBunny 12-28-2008 01:26 PM

you mention nothing of vagina i assume that is where the low score comes into play
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by sortie (Post 15254074)
Yep, that was a good one despite some low scores in certain areas.

I'll hit it again for sure.

Nice size naturals up front with reasonable rear cushion.

how big was her cock?

sortie 12-28-2008 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BusterBunny (Post 15254086)
how big was her cock?

Even though I actually never saw her cock, it was bigger than yours. :1orglaugh

BusterBunny 12-28-2008 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sortie (Post 15254105)
Even though I actually never saw her cock, it was bigger than yours. :1orglaugh

k you didn't see it and my weiner is small....did it stretch your ass when she slipped it in, did it poke you in the liver, and when she was on the outstroke were her arms fully extended or still slightly bent...this will help triangulate the size:winkwink:

sortie 12-28-2008 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BusterBunny (Post 15254126)
k you didn't see it and my weiner is small....did it stretch your ass when she slipped it in, did it poke you in the liver, and when she was on the outstroke were her arms fully extended or still slightly bent...this will help triangulate the size:winkwink:

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Violetta 12-28-2008 02:34 PM

we need pics!

sortie 12-28-2008 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rockatansky (Post 15254261)
we need pics!

No you don't.

It was good for me but, lets not get carried away that you wouldn't puke with pics.

:1orglaugh

Just keeping it real.

sortie 12-28-2008 08:19 PM

So.........

Drunk now off the left over booze.

Posing in the mirror like an idiot.

Listening to some 10 yr old music.

Stuffing face with some bullshit I cooked.

Evidently booty calls is all I can do, so fuck it.

I felt good for a few hours so fuck it. That's better than nothing.

Back to normal now........until wednesday. She's off work again...we'll see.

Until then....fuck it.

gornyhuy 12-28-2008 08:51 PM

So was she into dogfart or not?

sortie 12-28-2008 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gornyhuy (Post 15255382)
So was she into dogfart or not?

We never got to porn.

We did Chapple on regular TV then did some shit on hulu.com until we started fucking.

In the morning she was on yahoo mail with 8000 emails (no shit 8000).

I told her about spam filters and that seemed to fly way over her head.

Serious space case bro.

The low was she was blowing me and complained that it was taking too long for me
to cum. Yeah, that's my fault.............not!!!!!!!

But this shit is like standard now in the USA. chicks grow up expecting easy delivery
of everything and the way they deal with it is by delivering nothing themselves.

So I should write her off as totaly useless based on that but of course I won't.
I like dealing with sad useless shit just like the rest of you.

Ahhh, ignore this shit.... it's just PBCDS (Post Booty Call Depression Syndrome) :disgust

sortie 12-31-2008 03:48 PM

OK, it's wednesday.

After all that stuff I said, should I cancel the booty call or suffer thru it again just
for sex.

I could probably just go out tonight and get lucky anyway.
This has to be the luckiest night of the year? hehehe.

brassmonkey 12-31-2008 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky (Post 15252303)
12.Strap on dildo

:1orglaugh:helpme

sortie 12-31-2008 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brassmonkey (Post 15267533)
:1orglaugh:helpme

That's not nice. :1orglaugh

sortie 12-31-2008 06:07 PM

Ok, booty call just rang and of course I caved in after talking shit like I wasn't going to.

It'll be alright because once you see the naked ass everything works out.

tony286 12-31-2008 06:11 PM

thats too funny.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 12-31-2008 06:16 PM

http://www.arjenfun.com/kriebelfun/i...y_new_year.jpg

You go, stud!

ADG

sortie 12-31-2008 06:19 PM

I'm still thinking about bailing though.

Shit!!!!!!!

Fuck it, I got enough stuff here to make 10 people drunk.
I'll just get fucked up and then nothing matters.

AaliyahLove 12-31-2008 06:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sortie (Post 15267793)
I'm still thinking about bailing though.

Shit!!!!!!!

Fuck it, I got enough stuff here to make 10 people drunk.
I'll just get fucked up and then nothing matters.

you sound like a very sad lonely person. :(

sortie 12-31-2008 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaliyahLove (Post 15267820)
you sound like a very sad lonely person. :(

Wow, how did you figure that out?

Don't happy married people also make booty calls that they'd sometimes
rather eat pickled road kill than go thru with? :1orglaugh

sortie 12-31-2008 08:07 PM

OOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKKKKKKAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!


The fact that I'm back on the board should be a clear indication that everything
just fucked up!!!

:1orglaugh

Oh man, but this is not really funny at all!!!

This lady lives with her sister and they just had a fight.
She used her sister's car to go get a drink and a taco and it took two
hours and boy that must have been way too much.

She sounds scared.
I was susposed to go pick her up but not now.
She said she might call later but I seriously doubt it.

Her sister obviously has become the mom due to the sister owning the car
and the house.

So her sister is older/single and has no plans whatsoever tonight but she goes off
hardcore on her yonger sis.

Gee, I wonder what really sparked all the anger. </sarcasm>

d-null 12-31-2008 08:09 PM

sounds too nutty to deal with.......

but typical

sortie 12-31-2008 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d-null (Post 15268122)
sounds too nutty to deal with.......

but typical

Yeah man. Nutty is the word.

But the reality is just like WTF!!!

That sucks to be her right now.
I mean, she called me and I was not even wanting to see her really but I never
let on because, hey, give it a try ya know!!

Then after she eats her taco and goes home to take the car back her sister
explodes and she's afraid to leave.

Maybe she got threaten with being kicked out of the house.

sortie 12-31-2008 08:26 PM

She wasn't getting out much for sure because the way we met was I was having
a drink at the bar and she was eating at the other end of the bar which is about
maybe 30 feet.

As soon as a chair opened up next to me she grabbed her food and ran to
the end of the bar and sat next to me and introduced her self.

Hey, I'd like to think that I'm so studly that I have that effect BUTTTTTT!!!!!!!

She ran to the first guy that looked sane and doesn't live in that fucking dive.
:1orglaugh

AaliyahLove 01-02-2009 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sortie (Post 15268094)
Wow, how did you figure that out?

Don't happy married people also make booty calls that they'd sometimes
rather eat pickled road kill than go thru with? :1orglaugh

I don't know, I've never been married. But if they are HAPPILY married than I'd assume no, why would they be making booty calls to some what it sounds like white trash drama queens, then posting it on a message board to show everyone else how sad and pathetic they are? I hope you find happiness and true love in 2009 sortie cause it sounds like you need it!

Wagerboy 01-02-2009 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaliyahLove (Post 15275045)
I don't know, I've never been married. But if they are HAPPILY married than I'd assume no, why would they be making booty calls to some what it sounds like white trash drama queens, then posting it on a message board to show everyone else how sad and pathetic they are? I hope you find happiness and true love in 2009 sortie cause it sounds like you need it!

ouch but agreed :2 cents:

sortie 01-02-2009 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaliyahLove (Post 15275045)
I don't know, I've never been married. But if they are HAPPILY married than I'd assume no, why would they be making booty calls to some what it sounds like white trash drama queens, then posting it on a message board to show everyone else how sad and pathetic they are? I hope you find happiness and true love in 2009 sortie cause it sounds like you need it!

I find it hilarious.


Bartender I really did it this time
Broke my parole to have a good time
When I got home it was 6 a.m.
The door was locked so I kicked it in
She was trippin' on the bills
I think she was high on some pills
She threw my shit out into the yard
Then she called me a bum and slapped me real hard
And in my drunkin' stooper
I did what I should of never done
Now I'm sittin' here talking to you
Drunk and on the run

I'm sittin' at a bar on the inside
Waitin' for my ride on the outside
She broke my heart in the trailer park
So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car
And crashed that piece of shit and then stepped away

You know Moe I'll probably get ten years
So just give me beers til they get here
Yeah I know the sun is comin' up
And ya'll are probably gettin' ready for closin' up
But I'm trying to drown my soul
I'm tired of this life on a dirt road
And everything that I love is gone
And I'm tired of hangin' on

She got me sittin' at a bar on the inside
Waitin' for my ride on the outside
She stole my heart in the trailer park
So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car
And crashed that piece of shit and then stepped away

(rap)
I guess it's meant to be
Romance is misery
So much for memories
And now I'm headed to the Penitentary
See me on T.V.
The next cop series
I am a danger
I guess I should've done something about my anger
But I'll never learn
Real things I don't concern
I pour kerosene on everything I love and watch it burn
I know it's my fault
But I wasn't happy it was over
She through a fit so I crashed that piece a shit nova

And now I'm goin' back again
Back to the pen to see my friends
And when we all pile out that county van
They'll ask me where I've been

I've been at a bar on the inside
Waitin' for my ride on the outside
She broke my heart in the trailer park
So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car
Crashed that piece of shit and then stepped away

la..la..la..la...la la la....



:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

JamesK 01-02-2009 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaliyahLove (Post 15275045)
I don't know, I've never been married. But if they are HAPPILY married than I'd assume no, why would they be making booty calls to some what it sounds like white trash drama queens, then posting it on a message board to show everyone else how sad and pathetic they are? I hope you find happiness and true love in 2009 sortie cause it sounds like you need it!

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh


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