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-   -   I'm voting Republican (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=854735)

tony286 09-12-2008 07:41 PM

I'm voting Republican
 
http://dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/9...621/253/596744

I'm voting Republican because being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and
you need our prayers for your recovery.

I'm voting Republican because Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

I'm voting Republican because "Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

I'm voting Republican because a woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions
affecting all mankind without regulation.

I'm voting Republican because Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

I'm voting Republican because the best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

I'm voting Republican because group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.

I'm voting Republican because if condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

I'm voting Republican because a good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

I'm voting Republican because HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.

I'm voting Republican because providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

I'm voting Republican because global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

I'm voting Republican because Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

I'm voting Republican because a president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

I'm voting Republican because Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

I'm voting Republican because the public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

I'm voting Republican because what Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

I'm voting Republican because trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

IllTestYourGirls 09-12-2008 07:46 PM

What did the Democratic Congress do to try to change any of this?

Brujah 09-12-2008 07:47 PM

I'm voting Republican, because baddog lieberman has convinced me the Democrats are bad.

directfiesta 09-12-2008 07:48 PM

I'm voting republican, because I want change ..... spare change.

dav3 09-12-2008 07:49 PM

Vote Independent!

SoloGirlsContent 09-12-2008 07:50 PM

I'm voting Republican so my grandchildren will be in debt for the war in Iraq

IllTestYourGirls 09-12-2008 07:52 PM

Im voting democrate because I like the patriot act, I like fisa, I like taking troops out of Iraq and putting them in Afghanistan, I like threatening Iran with war, I like the idea of invading Pakistan, I like sending money and troops to Georgia, I like big business bail outs, I like the military commissions act.


Man we are fucked

marketsmart 09-12-2008 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllTestYourGirls (Post 14748262)
What did the Democratic Congress do to try to change any of this?

they got veteo'd by bush a LOT...

however, i wish we could dissolve congress and start all over again... :2 cents:

brassmonkey 09-12-2008 07:53 PM

http://craigslistgirls.org/images/La...-ImNotGay2.jpg we would love your vote "Im not gay!" :1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Malicious Biz 09-12-2008 07:53 PM

I'm voting republican because they are always too busy kicking fucking ass and being totally awesome to write silly "I'm voting ____ because" lists

marketsmart 09-12-2008 07:55 PM

btw tony, rush was going to dominican to fuck underage girls when he was busted with hydro and viagra...

he is a fucking scumbag.... i cant believe a ton of people still listen to him..

brassmonkey 09-12-2008 08:09 PM

republicans are like robots dont have feelings

escorpio 09-12-2008 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by marketsmart (Post 14748286)
btw tony, rush was going to dominican to fuck underage girls when he was busted with hydro and viagra...

he is a fucking scumbag.... i cant believe a ton of people still listen to him..

Hydro? Viagra? Underage girls? I want to party with that dude! :thumbsup

qxm 09-12-2008 08:31 PM

I am voting republican because I want to jack to the sexy Veep MILF everyday.....

</:upsidedow>

davidd 09-12-2008 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by escorpio (Post 14748346)
Hydro? Viagra? Underage girls? I want to party with that dude! :thumbsup

I have...

I will raise it up a notch by saying that I got there on EIB1.

http://images3.jetphotos.net/img/2/6...1106535596.jpg

marketsmart 09-12-2008 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidd (Post 14748400)
I have...

I will raise it up a notch by saying that I got there on EIB1.

http://images3.jetphotos.net/img/2/6...1106535596.jpg

my servants fly on those... true players roll the BBJ.... :2 cents:

Bama 09-12-2008 09:29 PM

That's a big list...

My only reason to vote Republican this time around.... to keep Obama out of office.

BFT3K 09-12-2008 09:37 PM

I'm voting Republican because I'm a total asshole! Fuck the USA! Big Oil and Neocons before country! Yeah, I'm a fucking scumbag, shortsighted, racist, Republican! Watch as I vote against my own self-interest! Yeah McSame and Bitcy 2008! I'm a total asshole! Oh yeah!

EonBlue 09-12-2008 09:58 PM

Why I'm Voting Democrat
http://townhall.com/Columnists/BenSh...oting_democrat

Quote:

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that the best strategy in war is defeat. It broadens the mind to learn Japanese, German and Arabic. Talk about multiculturalism!

I'm voting Democrat because I'm mad that George W. Bush hasn't caught Bin Laden. That's because Bin Laden is the only Islamic terrorist in the world.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that if I don't have enough money, the solution is for the government to take more of my money. Who needs money when gas is $5 per gallon?

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that the ideal family is two homosexual bonobos, a goat and a parrot raising a human baby. Love and compassion is all it takes to make a successful family!

I'm voting Democrat because it's my body, and if I want to kill my baby, I'll do it, even if its head is in the birth canal. If I want to cut out my intestines and feed them to the crocodiles, I'll do that too. That's the freedom our forefathers enshrined in the Constitution.

I'm voting Democrat because our enemies on the battlefield deserve comfy hotel rooms, Pay-Per-View, prostitutes and all the benefits of American citizenship.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe we need other countries' permission for me to turn down my thermostat.

I'm voting Democrat because I care about the real victims of crime -- criminals.

I'm voting Democrat because the real cure for racism includes preferential policies based on race -- particularly in presidential voting. If you believe that a black candidate ought to be qualified, as well as black, you're worse than Bull Conner.

I'm voting Democrat because everyone deserves crappy healthcare. Sure, you'll have to wait years for that life-saving cancer surgery. But it's first come, first served at the cemetery!

I'm voting Democrat because I believe in minority rights (except in Muslim countries), free speech (with regard to pornography but not conservative talk radio), environmentalism (unless we're talking about Al Gore's house) and diplomacy (but never backed by the threat of military force).

I'm voting Democrat because I like the words "hope" and "change." Also "kazoo." That's a funny word.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that America's founders were rich, white, greedy xenophobes, and that America's founding principles are hogwash requiring periodic editing from an unelected group of liberal judges.

Most of all, I'm voting Democrat because I like the ideas they have over in France, but I don't feel like moving there. I'll threaten to move, but I really won't. After all, I have a good job, healthcare, lower taxes, free speech and a social framework that promotes family structure. And all of it is defended by the most effective fighting force on the planet.

Another one:

I'm voting Democrat because...
http://wrightrepublican.blogspot.com...t-because.html

Quote:

I'm voting Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

I'm voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I'm voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they're doing because they now think we're good people.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

I'm voting Democrat because I'm not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for their stockholders. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that when the terrorists don't have to hide from us over there, when they come over here I don't want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

I'm voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

Because GFY is fair and balanced. :winkwink:

Brujah 09-12-2008 10:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EonBlue (Post 14748509)
Because GFY is fair and balanced. :winkwink:

Quote:

I'm voting Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for their stockholders. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.
Didn't Sarah Palin do that in Alaska to the Oil companies?

Pretty good lists, not as funny as the Republican ones were. The 2nd list you posted was good, the 1st list not so much.

tony286 09-12-2008 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brujah (Post 14748524)
Didn't Sarah Palin do that in Alaska to the Oil companies?

Pretty good lists, not as funny as the Republican ones were. The 2nd list you posted was good, the 1st list not so much.

she taxed the shit out of them but that does count. lol

EonBlue 09-12-2008 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brujah (Post 14748524)
Didn't Sarah Palin do that in Alaska to the Oil companies?

Pretty good lists, not as funny as the Republican ones were. The 2nd list you posted was good, the 1st list not so much.

Well, it's all fun and games until someone loses an election. :)

Personally I think you guys are screwed either way. :Oh crap

tony286 09-12-2008 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EonBlue (Post 14748509)
Why I'm Voting Democrat
http://townhall.com/Columnists/BenSh...oting_democrat




Another one:

I'm voting Democrat because...
http://wrightrepublican.blogspot.com...t-because.html




Because GFY is fair and balanced. :winkwink:

The republicans ones were based more on facts.

J. Falcon 09-12-2008 10:20 PM

I knew you weren't really voting republican.

tony286 09-12-2008 10:23 PM

https://youtube.com/watch?v=IH0xzsogzAk

EonBlue 09-12-2008 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tony404 (Post 14748549)
The republicans ones were based more on facts.

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." - Mark Twain

tony286 09-12-2008 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EonBlue (Post 14748609)
"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." - Mark Twain

I'm voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

having gays marry means people are going to want to marry animals?

tony286 09-12-2008 10:51 PM

I'm voting Democrat because free speech (with regard to pornography but not conservative talk radio),

This one should be read by anyone who works in our industry and is thinking about voting for Mccain.

EonBlue 09-12-2008 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tony404 (Post 14748614)
I'm voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

having gays marry means people are going to want to marry animals?

Yes. :winkwink:

LiveDose 09-13-2008 12:18 AM

Both parties are a joke.

Drake 09-13-2008 02:22 AM

Trading sites, electoral college projection, and polls have McCain leading slightly.

I think there is a large swathe of Americans that are more comfortable with McCain and this is why the race remains so close despite the real and perceived shortcomings of Bush x 2. McCain is familiar. We know him and we know his story. We know he flip-flops like every other politician but we don't question his patriotism. He wears it every day on his broken shoulders.

Obama is less familiar to us. His life story, while interesting and exotic, is exactly that - quite different from most Americans. In one way his life is the American Dream incarnate - an ordinary kid who moved up the social ladder. But he's not an all-American prototype. He didn't come from a traditional family background and his experiences in places like Chicago are ones that most Americans are not acquinted with (ex. most Americans have never attended a Black church - we all know how segregated churches are). In this regard, his life is entirely unique and unconventional to the majority. There is an uneasiness about this and questionable associations ignite fear, apprehension, and distrust. I've read messages on various boards about the elections and it's clear, for example, that some people feel Obama is a closet militant communist radical with an agenda to impose socialism on Americans and acquiesce to dangerous foreign states.

Issues appear secondary matters to the undercurrent described above. This is evidenced by the fact that 3rd parties with superior platforms still can't garner enough support to break the two-party system. Some of the ideas those 3rd parties propose were once the hallmark of America's domestic and foreign policies but are now so alien to the American mindset that they even seem radical.

I don't think there is any other solid explanation for this close election. Sure there has always been the battle between red and blue state philosophies about governance but I think that's only part of the story in this election. If 100% of Hillary supporters were behind Obama, it would be a landslide in the polls already. But then again, Hillary is also familiar to us in the same way McCain is. It seems to me that half of Americans are ready to try something "new" (what others consider retro a la Carter), and half are unsure or would prefer keeping things as is to err on the side of 'caution' because theoretically things can always get worse.

I could be far off the mark, and come election day there may actually be a landslide or some result not indicated in the current polls and projections. Events in the coming weeks will influence the numbers quite a bit too. Obviously the factors of gender, race, and hard feelings play into all this as well.

Ayla_SquareTurtle 09-13-2008 02:37 AM

It's so easy to tear down a straw man.

Violetta 09-13-2008 02:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tony404 (Post 14748253)
,....

ahahahahaha

pocketkangaroo 09-13-2008 04:22 AM

I'm voting Republican because the Earth is 6,000 years old and science totally sucks.

pussyserver - BANNED FOR LIFE 09-13-2008 05:42 AM

I am voting republican because I believe the lord jesus christ who are thou in heaven wants us to scour clean the earth of un god like thoughts such as pre marital sex and behavior direspectful to my lord such as the hugging and imoral hand holding seen on television.



I am votibg republican because......If god wanted us to research things that will improve human life like stem cell research, then he would have given us a sign and buckets and buckets of stem cells.... I don't see any buckets


I am voting republican because I am pregnant by my father but my brother thinks the baby is his...... If roe v wade is overturned niether of them can ask me to have an abortion



I am voting republican because I believe that debt is just a word.... and that we will never have to pay china back anyway... so lets charge it the fuck up


I am vo ting republican because democrats make too big a deal about the environment ... we all have to die at some point and if god wanted us to have clean air and preserve nature... he would have given us a sign


I am voting republican because I am a high school dropout and voting republican is the only way to be right with god

I am voting republican because I despise the adult entertainment industry and would like nothing better than to set examples out of all adult webmaster


Bottom line

I am voting republican because I am one inbred scared little man who's insecure in his sexuality.

FACT.. Every single republican male I have ever met has been latent homosexual and eventually comes out the closet. This is the main reason they fear gays so much

Babaganoosh 09-13-2008 06:15 AM

I'm voting Republican because I don't want a n1gger leading my country.

nation-x 09-13-2008 06:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike33 (Post 14748953)
I could be far off the mark, and come election day there may actually be a landslide or some result not indicated in the current polls and projections.

When I look at the polls from individual states... I realize the race isn't as close as the national polls indicate... remember we have the electoral college... and polls are done from "likely voters" which are sampled from people who voted in the last 2 elections... If you do some research on new voter registration you also realize that if they show up at the polls then this race isn't as close as it seems. Here in NC (a "solid" Republican state), voter registration for the Democratic Party has exceeded voter registration for the Republican Party for the first time in years by a current margin of more then 700,000 voters... but what will decide the election here in NC are "Unaffiliated" voters... which also exceeds the Republican registration numbers by a margin of around 100,000 voters.

nation-x 09-13-2008 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babaganoosh (Post 14749650)
I'm voting Republican because I don't want a n1gger leading my country.

your a fucking idiot

Babaganoosh 09-13-2008 06:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nation-x (Post 14749719)
your a fucking idiot

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

http://i282.photobucket.com/albums/k..._comic_062.jpg

nation-x 09-13-2008 07:23 AM

Ok... Let me clear that up dumb fuck... YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT.

Matt 26z 09-13-2008 07:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllTestYourGirls (Post 14748262)
What did the Democratic Congress do to try to change any of this?

The Democrats don't yet have the ability to get anything done by force, and Bush is unwilling to negotiate in the name of getting things done like Clinton always did.

The low congressional approval ratings are representative of a President who veto's anything the Dems try to get done and the Republicans in Congress who filibuster.

Under Obama, things would just pass right through like the Republicans did from 2001-2006. McCain is likely to meet half way and everyone is happy. Palin would be a puppet like Bush, so again, nothing would get done should she take power.

Babaganoosh 09-13-2008 07:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nation-x (Post 14749970)
Ok... Let me clear that up dumb fuck... YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT.

Care to explain why you think I am an idiot? I'm clearly more intelligent than you are.

borys 09-13-2008 08:06 AM

I'd vote republican if I could because the entire world hating America has been great for my european business.

mpornstars 09-13-2008 08:08 AM

i m voting republican....wait i can't vote...i m not from the US

LiveDose 09-13-2008 08:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nation-x (Post 14749719)
your a fucking idiot


Thanks for the tshirt idea.

Hank_Heartland 09-13-2008 08:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babaganoosh (Post 14749650)
I'm voting Republican because I don't want a n1gger leading my country.

Glad somebody finally said it...now we know how the red states really feel:thumbsup

I sure hope you need open heart surgery some day...so you can think afterwords...A N1gger just saved saved my life:321GFY

In case you not smart enough to figure it out...a n1gger developed the procedure:321GFY

notoldschool 09-13-2008 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllTestYourGirls (Post 14748262)
What did the Democratic Congress do to try to change any of this?

Your an idiot if you think that congress has done anything outside of what Bush and the socialist republican lackeys have wanted. Stop fooling yourself.

notoldschool 09-13-2008 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LiveDose (Post 14750283)
Thanks for the tshirt idea.

Your avatar explains everything. Your so dumb that you dont realize that YOUR the social outcast. People look at you and laugh. No really they do. Head back to the flea market and sell whats left of your nascar card collection.

Babaganoosh 09-13-2008 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank_Heartland (Post 14750344)
Glad somebody finally said it...now we know how the red states really feel:thumbsup

I sure hope you need open heart surgery some day...so you can think afterwords...A N1gger just saved saved my life:321GFY

In case you not smart enough to figure it out...a n1gger developed the procedure:321GFY

I'm black, idiot. The original poster's comments were sarcastic and facetious. Why was my comment taken so seriously? You people crack me up.

Babaganoosh 09-13-2008 09:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by notoldschool (Post 14750362)
Your avatar explains everything. Your so dumb that you dont realize that YOUR the social outcast. People look at you and laugh. No really they do. Head back to the flea market and sell whats left of your nascar card collection.

Hey, dumbass...

http://i282.photobucket.com/albums/k..._comic_062.jpg


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