The ULTIMATE X sale hiding technology. Step inside for $$$!
 

Program owners. Are you finding it harder and harder to hide those high profit cross sales?

You've tried putting them below the submit button, writing them out as words instead of numbers, and slipping them into tiny scroll boxes, but surfers are getting smarter. Did you know that a recent study has found that from 2006-2008, the IQ of the average surfer rose an astonishing 2 points. If this alarming trend continues, the IQ of the average surfer will surpass that of the average program owner, which is currently 84. How will you hide those cross sales then when your current methods no longer work?

Jim, I'm scared. What can we do?

First of all, don't panic. There is no need to be innovative or create anything the surfer would actually want to pay for. What you need to do is adapt. To leverage technology to squeeze every last ounce of money out of the remaining surfers who still pay for porn. What you need is our amazing new product...

Invisible Digital Ink.

That's right. By using an unused portion of the RGB spectrum, we've created a digital font color that is completely invisible to the naked eye and only becomes visible when shown under a black light. So legally, all your cross sales are on display RIGHT AT THE TOP OF THE PAGE but your surfers will never see them! It's not your fault the surfer doesn't have a black light next to his computer. In fact, our market research has shown that less than .00001% of the population surfs with a black light next to their computer. Using our technology your high profit cross sales will be virtually undetectable!

http://www.tranny3000.com/junk/ink.jpg

Can this really make me more money?

You bet it can! One of our beta testers recently put a cross sale on his join page that signs over the surfer's 401K plan as soon as he agrees to the terms of service on a free dating site. Talk about an upsell! The possibilities are endless. Collect houses, stock portfolios, gain power of attorney, and even collect first born children all from unsuspecting surfers. It's all possible and 100% legal with our patented invisible cross sale technology.

So if you want to succeed in today's marketplace, you need to adapt, and the best way to adapt is by using our Invisible Digital Ink Technology.

Don't get left behind. Sign up today for a FREE trial! No obligation. (Pay no attention to all that blank space below the submit button.)

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droppin my sig off

Nah, no drama. Just having a little fun.

That's pretty fucking funny.

But, much like The Onion, your execution killed the joke.

You saw me coming, dont ya?

hehe :) :)

lololololol. funny shit !1

I looked again and I smirked again. It's a winner.

lol@pic
\
but nice marketing, really!

So, in order to survive in the industry, you feel the need to fuck the surfer? C'mon it's shit like this that made things tough in the first place.

Good, but not as good as the one BradM did yesterday.

hahaha is all over this!

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

IT'S STILL FUNNY!

funny shit indeed

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

nice
:thumbsup

That's what he's pointing out ;)

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

instant classic.

thanks for the laugh man that was pretty fucking funny

I would give you extra points if you made it look like a press release.

good stuff :1orglaugh

Haven't I seen something similar before? :)

Shit, been doing that for 3 years now. That's old news.

Now we are doing malware that sniffs the surfers computer to find their credit card info and signs up for them, without them even knowing! They join up to about 20 sites and don't have a clue. God I love this business!!!!


;-)

I've actually seen that done before with illegally-obtained software.

LOL!! That's great! :thumbsup

Funny and kinda scary ;/ ....

It's just giving the surfer more value added services that they really want.

lol! Good one!

But I just wish that you guys realized that prechecks ain't shit. I've seen a lot of posts on GFY babbling about x-sells fucking the surfer. Well, they aren't anything CLOSE to what was done with dialers a few years ago. It seems like none of the people on GFY seem to have been around in the late 1990's and early 2000's to remember the MILLIONS of dollars made on dialers.

Ever hear about some of the "old school" "legends" who retired? That's how they did it.

The shit that is said to be "fucking the surfer" like pre-checks (which are used by mainstream as well) are NOT fucking anybody. But boy...you let one of those aggressive dialers get your ass 10 years ago and you ended up with a phone bill in the THOUSANDS of dollars in a few hours.

It was insane.

Yep, a prechecked x-sell that allows the surfer to un-check it and then if he doesn't... charges him a dollar, and then sends him an email with full details about how to cancel before the rebill happens...I can't even compare that to the old dialers that were in the html of almost every big traffic site back in the day.

Do any of you old timers remember Martin in Germany? He made us all a lot of money in Europe.

Those things downloaded and installed themselves, disconnected the surfer from their isp, then reconnected them to the dialer program and started charging several dollars a MINUTE to surf.

Now THAT was some serious fucking over of surfers. As I said MILLIONS were made for a lot of people.

And yet...somehow people still come to porn sites. I don't think x-sells are the "true ruin of the industry" at all. People weren't deterred by the dialers, they weren't deterred by the old popups that were endless and would run all the ram out of your machine and force you to hard boot...and they aren't going to be deterred by stupid x-sells.

Look at Naughty America. They are 100% clean with no x-sells. Never had 'em. They have great content and very good sites. Any of us that have been around for a few years have made great money with them.

But not now. The tubes and torrents are killing their sales dead because they basically have their entire members areas of all their sites ripped and on display for free.

That's your culprit. Not this little pansy ass shit that you noob's think is "fucking the surfer" You don't even have a clue how the surfers REALLY got fucked a few years ago.

HA!!! I remember dialers! I never used em thanx to the horror stories of FTC and other bullshit rumors those that were making money spread.

Yeah, they clamped down on it fast in the U.S. But boy there sure were a LOT of countries in Europe that took their sweet time to make it illegal. Took a few years to completely stop it. And fortunes were lost (for the poor bastards who got nailed ) and fortunes were made (for the smart bastards that nailed them and retired)

All those guys you read about every once in a while and hear about how much money they made and retired? Trust me, it wasn't because sales were so damn good in the "old days" like the newer people believe. :1orglaugh :pimp

I dunno, I was tossing up 20 pic sites making $1k a month for each one back in the day. I guess if I added a dialer I could have been making $10k a site.

Reminds me of when I was first on the net with AOL back in like 94 and they charged per minute for being online, some of my buddies were running up $1k a month in minutes and thinking nothing of it.

It would be according to how much traffic you had. If you mean single page sites with a few pics on them like maxcash used to have an army of people making...then "no" You wouldn't have enough traffic to something like that to make bank.

You win the "read the title but not the thread" award for the month of September. :winkwink:

FWIW, this thread is good, but it needs more cow bell.

The funniest post I have ever read on GFY.

Bravo:1orglaugh

So they hide sales?

Some of the people in this thread make me fall out laughing.

This thread delivers :) Nicely done!

please share the humor?

Nice post:)

:helpme :Oh crap

Oh god, just the mention of dialers here takes me back

I laughed my ass off at this !

BUMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 1111111111111111111111 :)

too funny :1orglaugh:1orglaugh

even funnier :1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh