Life explained in this Paragraph

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  • Pete-KT
    Workin With The Devil
    • Oct 2004
    • 51532

    #1

    Life explained in this Paragraph

    On the first day, God created the dog and said:
    'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'
    The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'
    So God agreed.
    On the second day, God created the monkey and said:
    'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'
    The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'
    And God agreed.
    On the third day, God created the cow and said:
    'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'
    The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'
    And God agreed again.
    On the fourth day, God created man and said:
    'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'
    But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'
    'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'
    So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
    Life has now been explained to you.
    There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service...
  • tony299
    lurker
    • Aug 2002
    • 57021

    #2
    I like it very good.

    Comment

    • BradM
      Confirmed User
      • Dec 2003
      • 3397

      #3
      Hahahaha

      Best post you've ever made Pete. That was so funny and so very true.

      Comment

      • VikingMan
        Exploiting human weakness
        • Jan 2008
        • 6867

        #4
        thank you, good post

        Comment

        • munki
          Do Fun Shit.
          • Dec 2004
          • 13393

          #5
          That was pretty awesome doood...

          I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.” -Oscar Wilde

          Comment

          • Socks
            Confirmed User
            • May 2002
            • 8475

            #6
            I can die happily now. My life peaked while reading this.

            Comment

            • martinsc
              Too lazy to set a custom title
              • Jun 2005
              • 27043

              #7
              Make Money

              Comment

              • Kroy
                Confirmed User
                • Sep 2005
                • 413

                #8
                That's actually a really sweet post man, makes ya think
                Kroy
                The Invisible Hand
                Say Hello

                "The stone age didn't end because they ran out of stones..." - S. Yamani

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                • Elli
                  Reach for those stars!
                  • Apr 2003
                  • 17991

                  #9
                  That's a great one!
                  email: [email protected]

                  Comment

                  • Vick!
                    Confirmed User
                    • Nov 2005
                    • 6882

                    #10
                    Thats sad and funny at the same time, and very true.
                    Affordable Quality Web Hosting

                    Comment

                    • Pete-KT
                      Workin With The Devil
                      • Oct 2004
                      • 51532

                      #11
                      glad you guys liked it, i got it in my email this morning from my sister

                      Comment

                      • qxm
                        Confirmed User
                        • Jul 2006
                        • 5970

                        #12
                        Originally posted by Socks
                        I can die happily now. My life peaked while reading this.
                        Same here... gr8 info m8 ...

                        ICQ: 266990876

                        Comment

                        • CaptainHowdy
                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                          • Dec 2004
                          • 94098

                          #13
                          Rofllllllllllll!

                          Comment

                          • Pete-KT
                            Workin With The Devil
                            • Oct 2004
                            • 51532

                            #14
                            Bump for the night guys

                            Comment

                            • 2012
                              So Fucking What
                              • Jul 2006
                              • 17189

                              #15
                              that was great thanx :D
                              best host: Webair | best sponsor: Kink | best coder: 688218966 | Go Fuck Yourself

                              Comment

                              • Pete-KT
                                Workin With The Devil
                                • Oct 2004
                                • 51532

                                #16
                                anytime fartfly

                                Comment

                                • Richard - Triplexcash
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Aug 2003
                                  • 915

                                  #17
                                  Great one, tnx
                                  Richard
                                  [email protected]
                                  ICQ: 322574184

                                  Comment

                                  • GrouchyAdmin
                                    Now choke yourself!
                                    • Apr 2006
                                    • 12085

                                    #18
                                    That was a pretty good one.

                                    Comment

                                    • Fusion ::Discodinero::
                                      Registered User
                                      • Aug 2007
                                      • 77

                                      #19
                                      finally it has been explained!

                                      DiscoDinero.com
                                      ICQ: 467-528-020

                                      Comment

                                      • Farang
                                        one sick puppy
                                        • Oct 2004
                                        • 11711

                                        #20
                                        Some people cheat, they don't get married
                                        Last edited by Farang; 04-27-2008, 02:15 AM.
                                        fbm

                                        Comment

                                        • Pete-KT
                                          Workin With The Devil
                                          • Oct 2004
                                          • 51532

                                          #21
                                          Originally posted by AAK
                                          Some people cheat, they don't get married
                                          what does that have to do with life being explained?

                                          Comment

                                          • woj
                                            <&(©¿©)&>
                                            • Jul 2002
                                            • 47880

                                            #22
                                            that's pretty good, heh
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