From Adult FYI
Chatsworth- It?s just like wrestling when you stop and think about it.
Last time KSEX was operating in town, the tag team of Porno Dan and XXX Jay pretty much power bombed the station?s future into smithereens.
It happened on a Friday night this past January, and Rude.com, KSEX?s main sponsor at that point was having a big $20,000 giveaway. Except Dan, who dyes his hair like a wrestler and was supposed to be KSEX?s Nature Boy, took it upon himself to steer the giveaway, like the Keystone Cops, into a brick wall.
Dan was out of it that night. Jay was more out of it. Dan, on the air, had been telling everyone who had worked for the station to fuck off and included Rude.com in that message. Meanwhile Jay had been on the GFY forum earlier telling everyone with an adult website how Rude.com had been stealing their content.
www.********.com/read.php?ID=26220
Like Hope and Crosby on a bad acid trip, Dan and Jay were the ambassadors of the monumental fuck up. With that evening?s debacle in the can, it was pretty much all she wrote for KSEX after that.
Its former owner Jon Belinkie, who precipitated the station?s decline with the firing of Wankus on air, had no choice but to close the doors. Because nearly every sponsor, like Rude, had been insulted to one degree or another, Belinkie soon discovered it was pretty hard to find advertisers who hadn?t been humiliated.
The dying words out of the KSEX building were that Belinkie couldn?t even lock the doors for good without there being some last minute drama about stolen cameras.
Except, now, several months later the doors have reopened. And in a script right out of WWE, Rude.com has joined forces with Wankus. It seems that Wankus had been methodically working deals the whole time the Belinkie administration was doing the samba to a death rattle. Weeks ago Wankus had a meeting in Thailand with the Rude owners, and Monday night was the results of those talks.
Like when WCW shut down and a lot of its wrestlers went over to Vince McMahon, that?s pretty much what?s happened over at Rude. Rude has launched as RudeTV, and the usual suspects from KSEX came out to party and be a part of the new regime.
Soxxx and Powder are back. Monica Mayhem?s returned and Tony Batman?s part of the new gig - evidence of Einstein?s theory about multiple egos colliding under one roof.
?It?s a webcast portal site with live and produced programming,? Wakus is saying as he?s taking some people on tour of the re-altered KSEX which features control rooms, studios and whatever else is necessary to produce this kind of undertaking.
There?s a new lounge area occupying about one-third of the original floor space. It?s painted with murals of naked women and sexual activity. And Wankus is about to start the 6pm show.
It?s called ?Guitarded? and looks somewhat like a game show in 3D. Wankus is keeping the patter going like a fast-talking Bob Barker while two porn chicks- Dakoda Brookes [pictured] and Carrie Moon- strum guitars against a green screen that puts them in a middle of a music video.
?You really fucking suck,? Wankus is telling one of the girls.
Predictably, the babes get naked. A big girl to begin with, Moon?s tits are huge and could do some serious damage to a passerby caught in their path. Roy Karch, who shows up to enough launch parties to qualify as an astronaut, is saying that Brookes was in his latest movie Angel Face. This erotic TV stuff is hardly new, however.
Karch was hosting a cable access show in Manhattan back in the early Seventies called The Underground Tonight Show which wound up being a case going to the Supreme Court. Meanwhile, outside, the Sunny Lane stretch limo sits. It doesn't appear to be going to the Supreme Court.
In the first minutes of Wankus? new show, it?s already obvious that the difference between Rude TV and KSEX is a moon landing compared to mooning.
Cleopatra is next telling me she?s co-hosting a show with Wankus on Wednesday nights. It?s called ?Smell My Finger.?
Strike that moon landing analogy.
