How I messed with a collection company
 

I had a cell phone a couple years ago with a company called telus here in canada.

the reception was horrible and they kept billing me for internet usage and never activated it. the contract was clear that they had to activate and they didnt' thus they continued with illegial billing me. Anyway I threw the phone away after talking to their reps a half dozen times and having them agree it was an illegial billing but they kept comming after the money anyway. it goes to a collection company. They try and get it on my credit record. I send proof of disput to equafx - off my credit record. the only way they can get it back on on is to sue me - and I WELCOME THIS. - anyway - the collection agency has decided to still try and collect anyway and calls me daily now. first they use an automated system to tell me to call them - i don't return the call and block the # - only so many #'s they have so this works. then the fun begins

now real people start calling me and they are NASTY. They tell me that they will call EVERY DAY NOW - 2 X a day till I pay this bill. - My answer to that - BRING IT!!!!!!!
so i decide to have some fun. I turn gay - ultra gay and make every phone call a phone sex call.

first it's a women. she started yelling at me and threatening me so I said mmmm - i like that. one sec - let me get some cooking oil so i can smeal it all over myself while you're bitching at me. - she goes - WHAT!!!!!!!!!???? I proceed to make noises like i'm smearing it all over myself and asking her to talk naughtier to me and go - ohh ohhhhh ohhhhhh ohhhhhh - anyway she hangs up and then her supericsor calls me - SCREAMING about how I mistreat women and how he's going to sue me (he called me - he has no case unless I make threats - all a judge will tell them is to stop calling me LOL - already ran that by my lawyer - so long as I don't call them i can say whatever so long as it isn't death threats.) - so this guy is PISSED. he's on a mission to scare me for making his co-worker cry.

SO i turn gay and talk about oiling him up and how much he will like it. HE decides to one up me and tells me - ok smart guy i'm putting this on speaker phone for the whole office to hear. and he does - so I get NASTIER. I tell everyone just how much he and I are gay lovers and how much he loves having me ram my cock up is greased up asshole and descibe our phone sex session in detail. I hear the office laughing their heads off at him. he abruptly cuts off the call. he calls me back SWEARING and cursing and telling me how he's going get me for that and i continue with the sex talk calling him sweetie and saying our lovers quarl will pass in time.

they didn't call for 2 days now.

i'm disapointed. I had much better stories lined up (poo orientieted and animal oriented next) sooo looking forward too seeing just how far they would go.



mainstream collection people just don't get it. tehe

I love collection agencies...... I always tell them to fuck off.

OMG, that was hilarious, hahahahaha.
WG

now I call them all 'sweetie'. THEY HATE THAT!

everyone tells them to fuck off. they're used to that. they don't know how to handle being called sweetie. they FREAK when you use that and are passifying to them when they are rude - try it REALLY messes with their heads

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh
sounds like real fun ;-)

air horn.. they work wonders and much quicker.

I used to do this kind of shit to telemarketers. Now that I don't have a landline I kinda miss it.

that is cool :thumbsup


but sex talk is soooooo much more fun

i'm still laughing about him on speakerphone and me telling the office just how much he likes it up the bum

lol, nice

you can just tell them not to call you ever again(if you get bored of the phone sex), if they do, you can sue them, be sure to record it :)

the last collection agency that called me I told them "ummm he passed away 2 days ago." haven't heard from them since.. I'm sure they will eventually find out that I'm not dead haha

that is freakin funny.....

omg..soo funny, good way of handling things...please record it next time and post it here :D

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh :thumbsup

Since my hospital would not offer me a discount for paying cash, I let one bill go to the point where someone called me, I said give me the amount I need to write the check for to close it out. My bill went from $678 to $458 instantly. Billing departments are just jerks. Now they have to pay someone for calling me, and accept less money anyway. Worked out well denying that cash discount up front, huh? :winkwink:

Hahahaha waht a story...Thanks Sleazy for sharing :)

lolllllllllllllllllll

videotape it and youtbe it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i pay my bills. i don't pay fraudlent bills though

I had this colocated server once with an old hosting company and we moved to a dedicated server package. I then cancelled the account and they claimed i still owed 60 days worth of hosting for early termination. Its amazing how quickly they let that bill go when I reminded them they never sent me back my colocated server and in fact no longer had it. Once you mention things like destruction of property, theft and other criminal charges, they very quickly let my bill go.

Don't you just love billing departments!
WG

My wife is a collection agent.

What agency called you? Global, TCR or CollectCorp?

"I proceed to make noises like i'm smearing it all over myself"

LIKE i'm smearing it all over myself. Come on dude, everyone who's been at your place knows you have a bottle of Xtra Virgin Oil in your office.

Pfffrttt tell it like it is Sleazy, you WHERE rubbing the oil while she was talking to you ;-)

Oh I pay mine too :) But I KNEW that as soon as a collector called = instant discount. And my credit rating has not been hit whatsoever, lol. Risky, but I got the satisfaction they tried to deny, heh.

Collection agencies usually make a percentage of whatever is owed, but only if they collect.. so they'll bottomline it instantly and cut the shit if you're writing a check.

I think it's funny that you're just costing them money and they have no way to make a dime anyway, lmao :1orglaugh

This sounds like the way I would go Yngwie. Make them feel bad and say "May he Rest In Peace" or " I guess he's not worried about that bill now" :1orglaugh

I'm still getting calls about a cell phone bill from 8 years ago when I dropped Cingular before the two year contract was up. Bill was paid but they want $150 per line for 4 lines that I had canceled. I told them don't call me back unless you can prove it and I've never heard back.

_

My ex wife screwed up my credit a few years back. Then I had a similar situation with a cell phone, and I told the guy to do his worst.

LMFAO that's great! If I ever end up owing money I knwo what I'm doing.

Funny stuff:thumbsup

hehe... hope i never have to deal with a credit agency but if i do...

hahahaha :1orglaugh

wait... wait... you wern't before?

Hahahahaha, that is good.

absolutely fiun

OMG Sleazy! Now that is funny shit.

Damn, you got quite a lot of free times on your hands, huh??

I tried the gay shit with a cold call salesman and unfortunately he was gay and wanted to hook up.

:1orglaugh

BACKFIRE!

omg haha you should have recorded it!

:Oh crap i guess they didn't know who they were fucking with ...

Good work... I kept a telemarketer on the phone for a half hour about 2 months ago... was worth listening to


Some people...

I cant believe she started crying... must have a boring sex life...