Hollywood Rock Critic Survives Shark Attack
LOS ANGELES ? In a rather bizarre twist of events, a well known rock journalist and screenwriter was attacked in his own swimming pool by a six foot Tiger shark that was accidentally dropped there by a Los Angeles Fire Department helicopter while fighting a raging brush fire in the 2000 block of Nichols Canyon on Tuesday night.
Brett Meisner, 39, was rushed to an area hospital early Wednesday morning after the vicious attack in the swimming pool area of his Hollywood Hills residence . Meisner suffered massive blood loss and substantial injuries to his right arm during the scuffle. The shark was killed during the half hour battle which was reportedly triggered by Meisner?s attempt to remove the shark from his pool.
?He was obviously angered by the circumstances of having this animal in his swimming pool,? said veteran record producer, Bob Ezrin. ?We tried to persuade him to wait for the proper authorities, but he wouldn?t listen to us.? Ezrin and another house guest drove Meisner to the hospital after witnessing the entire attack. ?It was one of the most bizarre events I have ever witnessed, and I?ve seen a lot over the years.?
Meisner was released from the hospital Saturday morning and is reportedly in good condition. Manager Jace Hollinger did not rule out pursuing legal action on behalf of his client. ?Our main concern is Brett?s health and safety,? stressed Hollinger. ?At the same time we strongly oppose the idea that it is acceptable for the Fire Department of Los Angeles to cluster bomb its citizens with man eating sharks.?
The Los Angeles Fire Department is conducting a full investigation and refused to comment at this time. It is believed that the shark may have been accidentally pulled from the waters of Malibu as a squad of ten fire fighting helicopters were repeatedly reloading their payloads with ocean water in an effort to fight the fire in the posh and exclusive Canyon area. Believed to have been started by an unattended campsite fire, the blaze destroyed nearly 40 acres of land. No homes were damaged as a result of the fire.
This shit made me laugh for hours :1orglaugh
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