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-   -   Someone asks "What do you do?" - What to say? (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=764537)

ridikuloz 08-29-2007 03:57 PM

Someone asks "What do you do?" - What to say?
 
I've had a couple of people ask me what I do and I tell them that I do web design, web marketing, and/or webmaster. Sometimes I pray they don't ask me "Oh, what sites do you do or own?" but what do you tell them if they do ask you? Do you go straight to the point "Well, I hustle porn" or do you bullshit or say something else?

Methodcash Rick 08-29-2007 04:01 PM

After 15+ years in this business, I've come to the conclusion of, fuck'em if they can't handle the troof

Video Rob 08-29-2007 04:05 PM

I tell them I work in online adult or online affiliate marketing, depending on who the person is.
The first answer always gets loads of questions and the second one usually gets a blank look.

RawAlex 08-29-2007 04:08 PM

Programming, database work, graphics, web design, and affiliate programs like amazon.com or google ads. That usually shuts them up, way more information than they want to know.

kristin 08-29-2007 04:16 PM

"Marketing and Sales for an online company."

TeenCat 08-29-2007 04:16 PM

does matter who is asking, mostly i say im selling porn, but not every time ;) sometime im selling books and doing websites for my clients ;)

Ayla_SquareTurtle 08-29-2007 04:17 PM

most people, I just tell the truth. With some (as with my best friend's overly religious mother) I just mumble something about computers and the internet until their eyes glaze over.

fuzzylogic 08-29-2007 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristin (Post 13006338)
"Marketing and Sales for an online company."

ya, thats what i say too.

ridikuloz 08-29-2007 04:19 PM

I've had a situation where before I dated my g/f she asked me what I did, I told her that I was a webmaster she said ok.... and then a couple of months she finds out that I had business with porn... she instantly had a bad impression of me because typically porn is considered "dirty" or "perverted" but then when I showed her the checks, she shutted the fuck up :D

Flynn 08-29-2007 04:20 PM

I tell them I do internet marketing or video teleconferencing software technology. No matter what I tell them they usually don't ask many questions. I like to confuse them and then ask them what they do for a living. Most of the time I get a blank stare like Video Rob said.

munki 08-29-2007 04:21 PM

"I produce, distribute, and market adult videos and other content..." followed usually by either

a. "you should check out this site at (insert url), I think you'd enjoy it"
b. " are you interested in modeling"
c. " no I won't give you a fucking free pass you cheap bastard."

Gets the job done...

Swish 08-29-2007 04:53 PM

There is one of these threads every other week it seems like... and I say "Web Developer" followed by "for a porn site" if they seem like the kind of person who isn't going to flip out.

Spunky 08-29-2007 04:56 PM

Online marketing is pretty safe

Nicky 08-29-2007 04:59 PM

Online Marketing, Search Engine Marketing ETC, if you dont want him/her to find out its porn that you market, just saying that you do SEO work for online companies is good, kinda hard to track down when you say you did some search engine optimizing for whatever.com

Baal.PitBull 08-29-2007 05:07 PM

I just tell them the truth.

"know all those porn sites you get emails from 300 times a day?"

" I write the scripts that make a grown man scream.
I write the scripts of porn and everything.
I write the scripts that make a wife cry divorce.
You know that script I wrote. Of course. "

Big Red Machine 08-29-2007 05:25 PM

I tell em "I Make Fuck Films"

CurrentlySober 08-29-2007 05:26 PM

I look them straight in the eye, and say...

i like poo

PantiesDropped 08-29-2007 06:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ayla_SquareTurtle (Post 13006342)
most people, I just tell the truth. With some (as with my best friend's overly religious mother) I just mumble something about computers and the internet until their eyes glaze over.

That's me too. If I know the people I tell them the truth, but If I know their tight asses about porn they know I'm do internet marketing

porsche 08-29-2007 06:56 PM

i say to family members, friends ...... " i work in IT. " haha

( my parent know what i do and my dad thinks its awesome) haha

uno 08-29-2007 06:58 PM

I used "computer consultant" in court today.

Nasty 08-29-2007 07:15 PM

I tell them I have one of those "Work at Home" jobs they see stapled to telephone poles everywhere

horvy 08-29-2007 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ridikuloz (Post 13006356)
I've had a situation where before I dated my g/f she asked me what I did, I told her that I was a webmaster she said ok.... and then a couple of months she finds out that I had business with porn... she instantly had a bad impression of me because typically porn is considered "dirty" or "perverted" but then when I showed her the checks, she shutted the fuck up :D

lol. "she shutted the fuck up :D" he says.

zand_stein 08-29-2007 07:29 PM

i will tell them, i work as a web designer for adult entertainment.....

tony286 08-29-2007 07:36 PM

depends on who im talking too,my family knows what I do but if I dont feel comfortable I say websites, multimedia and I give them my candy site www.creamycandy.com . To throw together a mainstream website doesnt take much effort and when you get checks from it.Its a real suprise.

421Fill 08-29-2007 07:40 PM

I tell them I'm a plumber.

Phoenix 08-29-2007 07:58 PM

l tell them i work on the slaughter house floor

snaker 08-29-2007 08:03 PM

I design the affiliate backend software...i tried saying web marketing and they always ask.."really , which sites?", they have no clue what affiliate backend software is so it seems to work

ronaldo 08-29-2007 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by uno (Post 13007025)
I used "computer consultant" in court today.

Yep yep. That's the way to go. Website consultant. People ask me how to increase revenue, traffic, improve content etc. None of which is a lie.

Internet marketing screams porn. And to the UNeducated, porn screams CP. Never discount that people outside our industry frequently make that association.

starpimps 08-29-2007 08:12 PM

heres an idea;
setup a website claiming you run some sort of an SEO biz.
anyone asks say u do this so called "SEO" and give them the site address. :2 cents:

starpimps 08-29-2007 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ronaldo (Post 13007323)
Yep yep. That's the way to go. Website consultant. People ask me how to increase revenue, traffic, improve content etc. None of which is a lie.

Internet marketing screams porn. And to the UNeducated, porn screams CP. Never discount that people outside our industry frequently make that association.

yeah cause thats when this industry makes the news :(

CDSmith 08-29-2007 08:18 PM

If their questions get too pointed I tell them the truth.... I own websites that run the gammut, designed to send the surfer to what they are looking for. If they want to buy stuff I direct them to online stores. If they want adult stuff there are sites in my network that point them to that stuff. And no matter where they head off to, if they buy anything be it adult or mainstream, I make money. I basically direct traffic, and am an online marketer. Period.

If that answer doesn't satisfy them then it's time to hit them with a barrage of questions about what THEY do. It's better to own the conversation rather than be owned by it.

Big Red Machine 08-29-2007 08:58 PM

I used to say Online Marketing, but once in awhile you get someone smart enough to ask "Market What?"...lol

CheeseFrog 08-29-2007 09:03 PM

I tell them "IDK my BFF Jill" and when they start to give me shit about it, I tell them "OMG TISNF!"

ridikuloz 08-29-2007 10:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheeseFrog (Post 13007513)
I tell them "IDK my BFF Jill" and when they start to give me shit about it, I tell them "OMG TISNF!"

OMG WTF HAX 1337 BBQ

JamesK2 08-29-2007 10:35 PM

I tell them online marketing but I'm also doing lots of mainstream shit online so I don't feel it's necessary to mention adult.

BlackCrayon 08-29-2007 10:39 PM

i just tell em i help run the interweb

but seriously unless the person is close enough to me to warrent the truth, i just tell em web design, seo, ppc, domains. You'd be surprised how many people ask me what a domain is.

DaddyHalbucks 08-29-2007 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BB-Rick (Post 13006276)
After 15+ years in this business, I've come to the conclusion of, fuck'em if they can't handle the troof


Hahahahaha, excellent!

:thumbsup

calibra 08-29-2007 11:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky (Post 13006509)
Online marketing is pretty safe

Yeah, the best thing to say.

irinasp 08-30-2007 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ridikuloz (Post 13006259)
Sometimes I pray they don't ask me "Oh, what sites do you do or own?"

i wonder, how they haven't asked you yet...

irinasp 08-30-2007 12:24 AM

maybe you should make a modest site about anything you want and show it to everyone!)

voa 08-30-2007 12:32 AM

Just say any kind of sites.

flashfire 08-30-2007 12:40 AM

I actually do mainstream "online marketing" bet 90% of people assume its all porn

da man 08-30-2007 02:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristin (Post 13006338)
"Marketing and Sales for an online company."

for sure 1 of the safest way of putting it :winkwink:

Sarah_Jayne 08-30-2007 04:03 AM

Internet Marketing is usually good enough for people that just want a general answer. I have mainstream sites to show if I have to.

[ Nate ] 08-30-2007 04:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BB-Rick (Post 13006276)
After 15+ years in this business, I've come to the conclusion of, fuck'em if they can't handle the troof

:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup

pornvue 08-30-2007 04:12 AM

just tell em im working on porn sites....it gets interesting after that

uno 08-30-2007 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ronaldo (Post 13007323)
Yep yep. That's the way to go. Website consultant. People ask me how to increase revenue, traffic, improve content etc. None of which is a lie.

Internet marketing screams porn. And to the UNeducated, porn screams CP. Never discount that people outside our industry frequently make that association.

The judge was impressed that I've ran this business for 10 years now.

Angie77 08-30-2007 04:18 AM

I usually say online marketing. Then affiliate manager if they're really interested..

Tom_PM 08-30-2007 06:35 AM

The doctor who were doing my heart surgery asked me while I was on the table, lol. Hell of a time to be in a weird spot like that!
I told him that I do online support work for some large clients, and also buy and sell online ads.

Scott McD 08-30-2007 06:52 AM

I normally always say web design. They usually don't ask any more questions after that...


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