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Swearing at work

It has been brought to management's attention that
some individuals throughout the company have been
using foul language during the course of normal
conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees
who may be easily offended, this type of language will
no longer be tolerated. We do, however, realize the
critical importance of being able to accurately express
your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore, a list of 18 new and innoative phrases have
been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and
information can continue in an effective manner.

1. Try Saying: I think you could use more training.
Instead Of: You don't know what the fuck you're
doing.

2. Try Saying: She's an aggressive go-getter.
Instead Of: She's a ball-busting bitch.

3. Try Saying: Perhaps I can work late.
Instead Of: And when the fuck do you expect me to
do this?

4. Try Saying: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
Instead of: No fucking way.

5. Try Saying: Really?
Instead Of: You've got to be shitting me!

6. Try Saying: Perhaps you could check with ...
Instead Of: Tell someone who gives a shit.

7. Try Saying: I wasn't involved in the project.
Instead Of: It's not my fucking problem.

8. Try Saying: That's interesting.
Instead Of: What the fuck?

9. Try Saying: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
Instead Of: This shit won't work.

10. Try Saying: I'll try to schedule that.
Instead Of: Why the fucking hell didn't you tell me
sooner?

11. Try Saying: He's not familiar with the issues.
Instead Of: He's got his head up his ass.

12. Try Saying: Excuse me, sir?
Instead Of: Eat shit and die.

13. Try Saying: So you weren't happy with it?
Instead of: Kiss my ass.

14. Try Saying: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
Instead Of: Fuck it, I'm on salary.

15. Try Saying: I don't think you understand.
Instead Of: Shove it up your ass.

16. Try Saying: I love a challenge.
Instead Of: This job sucks.

17. Try Saying: You want me to take care of that?
Instead Of: Who the hell died and made you boss?

18. Try Saying: He's somewhat insensitive.
Instead Of: He's a prick.
T

thank you.

Human Resources