How to get in the news?
 

I've got a nice scoop about walmart, that would make a really nice news story :)

How do you go about contacting the news agencies out there to see if they want to investigate or feature a story?

Is there one site that you could submit to where every outlet checks that, or do you contact each one? How would you go about doing this?

Obviously, I can't say what walmart has done, but you guys will be the first to know once I can let the cat out of the bag.

contact your local investigative reporter?

No, I should rephrase, it's not a investigation type of story, it's a cool weird news item.

It has to do with a sandwich I bought there. I'll let your imagination run on that :)

You found a penis in your sandwich... :upsidedow

haha, no, no penis.

You eat at Walmart and found something odd about a sandwich .... AND?

I think the news should do a story on people who eat sandwiches from Walmart...

Let me guess:
You arrive at Walmart during the afternoon (probably a Tuesday) and you find yourself extremely hungry. Normally you wouldn?t trust Walmart?s deli department but you are just that hungry so you decide to go ahead and buy a small sub. Suddenly as you are about to bite into it the sandwich starts screaming ?NO, NO MISTER, PLEASE DON?T BITE ME!?. You drop the sandwich, you are scared like you have never been before. You think for a minute ?am I high? Did I toke some weed earlier? No.. no I?m positive I didn?t, I barely had enough for this fucking sandwich, no way I could have gotten weed.?. So you think you imagined it.

Maybe it?s the stress from work, maybe its family troubles you wonder to yourself? you pick back up the sandwich and prepare to bite into it once again. The sandwich then suddenly slaps the fuck out of your face and you and the sandwich start struggling, the sandwich starts choking the shit out of you and squirting mayonnaise in your eyes and you are temporarily blinded. The sandwich then starts banging your head against the dirty floor. You finally get a good hold on the sandwich and force it into its deli bag once again, depriving of it?s much needed oxygen. Slowly, but surely, the sandwich succumbs to the asphyxiation?

You pull the dead sandwich from the bag and poke it ever so gently, afraid, wondering if it?s still breathing. You check its pulse, you feel nothing. You slowly pull off the bread and what you see makes you get sick to your stomach. You drop the deli bag to the ground and take a few steps back? for what you killed wasn?t a sandwich at all but instead it was a midget dressed in a sandwich costume promoting Walmart?s new super deli sub delight. Thinking you could get a few extra bucks, you scoop the little fellow back into the bag and you are now looking for a news agency so that you can claim that somebody put a dead midget into your sandwich. You intend to sue Walmart for pain and suffering, just like that damn woman tried to do to Wendy?s with the finger-in-the chili scandal.

Well don?t try it pal, it won?t work. I already tried it.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Where oh where did the old GFY go to?

Just wow:thumbsup :1orglaugh

call up a local newspaper?

damn man, where do you comeup with that shit? :1orglaugh

everyone already knows that walmart sucks ass