Clean up your English!
 

That's right! I want to see some better grammar, sentence structure, and spelling on this board!

I speak english very good, :1orglaugh

Comon, do you realy expect people to answer this thread seriously?

or what?
:thefinger

akjsdfnbaksjndkasnksnkdnsknsakn....and I went skdjfnksdjfnksdjfkdjndfknk go funny in the sdhfbsjhfbjshfbdjsbfjsbjfhbsd poop on the kjdfksdnfksnksd when I fart it smell.

i poorly understooding what you meaned brather :thumbsup

Most common mistakes...

messing up: you're and your
amatuer
wierd

Seems just fine to me

also... there they're their

Let's not forget the whole your/you're thing.

S-P-O-N-S-O-R
NOT "sponser" or "sponcer".

Who could forget the then/than thing which is not at all complicated.

Examples:

I'll drink some beer, THEN throw up.

I drink more beer in a day THAN you do in a month.

I was under the impression that weird and wierd were interchangeable...

There's also to and too..

proper usage:

to: I have to go somewhere.

too: There are too many items in your basket.

I don't get it

Shit, that's one of my favorites and I forgot it! :(

Do you want us to use Old English, Middle English, King's English, Common English or American English? :Graucho

All of you should get an aducetion!!!

Its edukashion not aducetion you big doodie head!

if your wife sucks my cock then maybeeeeeeeeeee:thumbsup

there was only one there when's I gone to school.
so :helpme

I ignore all mistakes .......and I was an english tutor

Yes, Virginia's English is very different also :Graucho

English lessons:

BESTIALITY/BEASTIALITY
"bestiality" correct.
"beastiality" incorrect.

HAVE/OF
"I could have" correct.
"I could of" incorrect.

EFFECT/AFFECT
"I effected a change in the department" means "I brought about a change in the department."
"I affected a change in the department" means "My input had an impact on the change in the department."

"She spoke to great effect" means "Things happened because of what she said."
"She spoke with an affect" means "There was something idiosyncratic or strange about her manner of speaking."

This is so much misused English on this board, one hardly knows where to begin. However, I find that many of those from non-English speaking countries have a better grasp of the language. Perhaps because their textbooks are more oriented toward teaching than embodying diversity.

Poshel na khuy - correct
Fuck you - incorrect.


:321GFY

Yeah I'm sure people care about grammar, sentence structure, and spelling on GFY

Ok, here's my contribution. This is an English grammar rule that has been so battered and abused that even the literary elite often make the mistake.

When referring to hypothetical events, use "were" and not "was"

INCORRECT: "If I was 20, I would kick your ass."
CORRECT: "If I were 20, I would kick your ass. "

INCORRECT: "If I was you, I'd start running."
CORRECT: "If I were you, I's start running."

If you want to look this up, look for the "past subjunctive' form of "to be".

Many people don't like the sound of that (I do) but it is correct. Of course, what is correct english is highly subjective. Not that long ago, spelling wasn't even standardized. Samuel Johnson's Dictionary, published in 1775, began the process of English spelling standardization.

So Colin, couldn't make it in the real world either?
I'd say that 25% of the guys and girls in here come with a background in teaching.

Me Fail English? That's unpossible! ~ Ralph Wiggam

Marty, you're right!

I graduated with a BS in physics in 1996. I taught high-school (calculus) for a year. Needless to say, teachers are poor! I knew I couldn't live my life that way.

I formed an internet marketing company with a friend from college and my first two clients were adult companies. I saw the money and became interested in this business right away.

At the same time, I received a job offer from Dean Witter. So I sez .. "Dean Witter? Porn? Dean Witter? Porn?"

I made my decision and never looked back. It was the correct one.

Speaking of incorrect, what's the deal with using "prolly" instead of probably. It drives me crazy.

INCORRECT: "I have sex with alot of beautiful women."
CORRECT: "I masturbate a lot."

Pretty obviously, they don't.

It's so subjective that a job application full of misspellings can result in it being tossed into the cylindrical file.

since when is this become an English class? Who has that much time on there hands to think of this for a thread?

I hate it when people say "looser" instead of "loser".

or when people say "tomarrow" instead of "tomorrow".

I've seen "amature" about as frequently as "amatuer." Of course "amateur" is the correct spelling.

Calling a male a "masseuse" (feminine form of "masseur") is always a laugh for me.

I suppose the confusion over weird/wierd is that it's an exception to the "i before e except after c" rule.

What gets me is people who can't pin down common words they must see just about every day.

My favorite misspelling was the truck I saw parked outside a house that said "Joe Schmoe (that part I made up) Plumming, Heating, Air Conditioning." Jeez, when you don't even know how to spell your own profession!

> INCORRECT: "I have sex with alot of beautiful women."
> CORRECT: "I masturbate a lot."

haha

are there anyone who can be understanding my worse england?
You are have to understand forgaynors, that is not they're fault they aren't understanding prober england granmar, they're original tongue are not england.
:2 cents:

Here's a question, when you are reading a press release, or looking into programs (i'm not naming names but they are SO out there LOL) and you notice spelling or grammatical errors, do you give a shit? Does it annoy you or do you ignore it? I am compelled to send the offender an email correcting them, but I'm not getting paid to do it, so fuck it. LOL

However, if English is not the writers native tongue, all is forgiven. :)

yeah, i give a shit. if a company wants to do business with me, and they have a lot of misspellings and 'lol's and other such crap on their page, it turns me off.

it "feels good" working with someone who is more professional than i am, even if it is an illusion. after all i'm hiring/working with them because they're the professionals.

Ill clean up my english when you clean up your French!

ah!

Merde alors! Salope.

LOL that isn't good English, it's simply fiction vs. truth.

:1orglaugh