Darklady |
06-22-2006 06:41 PM |
Congress Must Protect The Godly Few
I believe that there needs to be a law rushed through Congress to protect those precious few Americans who still cherish the truly unique customs that make this country great.
Surely, heterosexual monogamous marriage has proven itself repeatedly to be one of the great American traditions. After all, so many of us have done it so many times! Who doesn't love the thrill of a wedding and the joy of unwrapping gifts with extended warranties that will still be valid during the subsequence, invariably heterosexual exit interview process known as divorce?
I for one think we need to stand up and salute the great American patriots who want to make sure that gays never experience the thrill of watching someone who sure looked good by barlight throw a piece of expensive jewelry across the room while vowing a financially painful court experience. Since gays obviously can't have children "naturally" like god-fearing and consistently fertile heterosexuals, they also can't fully comprehend the bliss inherent in watching children develop creative coping methods in response to their sexually frustrated and emotionally stunted but Definitely Heterosexual, if nearly celibate, parents' marital bliss. And we all know that god was not only pretty serious about the heterosexuality thing but also the marriage thing, since gays not only can't have kids together but straight people can't get pregnant unless there's a bill of sa... marriage certificate involved.
I think that Utah has the right idea. I think these goodly Christians have the right idea, if with the wrong intent. We must collect the names, personal information, and email addresses of all who stand firm against gay marriage. We must assemble them in a computer data base and send them to all of the gay rights (etc.) agencies in the country and make sure they check their own mailing lists against those addresses. You know, to make sure they don't send them any unwanted email or anything.
It's not just what's right. It's what God wants.
-- Darklady
Assistant Editor, YNOT.com
Host, "Darklady's Sexpose," YNOTRadio.com
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