dating out of our industy.. >>??
 

I have been stuggling with this situation a bit and going on a bunch of dates, but wtf do you till the women that your on a date you do, and when do you tell them what you really do.. or are you so jaded you dont give a fuck anymore? :P

i usually tell them i work in web design which is kinda true.. I pefer for them to get to know me first instead of doing a double take on what the fuck I do for a living..

anyhow.. just ranting..

the whole datting thing is so friggin hard to begin with and then throw in porn in the mix. *sigh*

if your a guy its horriable, no matter what u say the girl with think you are a scum bag.

if your a chick your automatically the freakiest thing on the planet.

if you date within the biz it always comes around to bite you in the ass one way or another.

its tough man.

yea it does suck ass.. I had this female friend in SD and we got along well, i felt her out (NOT UP) and after like 6 months I finally dropped the bomb on her but i knew she could handle it since we had been pretty good friends, and I wouldnt want to hang around someone not open minded about things or a republican.. hahaha

I've never really gotten a bad reaction from telling some chick what I do. Usually when they ask I say webdesign and if they ask a second question I tell them I promote a variety of products online most of which are targeted to adults. I don't know if there's a difference but I figure that sounds better than saying "I peddle pussy online". I'm about to go on a third date with this girl and she still doesn't know because she still hasn't asked what I do.

Honesty is always the best policy. :2 cents:

Oh im all one for honesty, just well, i mean when do u drop the bomb, i usually like the feel the person out, and well i dont want to be with some tight ass person well maybe in other situations but.. haha

yea.. Actually this chick I went out on a few dates the other day googled me, and well umm.. lots of things popped up from my history in video games to umm adult stuff.. heh

I forgot to mention that age definitely makes a difference. If she is <25 she might make a stink about it but if she is >25 then there probably won't be a problem. Chicks that are >30 don't mind at all usually since they're desparate to marry any guy and are just glad that you have a job. That's just a loose guidline and may not apply to your situation.

lmfao......is that so?

haha. its always been an issue for me, i try not to date in the industy, my last GF was a stripper (only smart one I have met) and it was cool with her.. anyhow,, just thought I would start a thread see what other peeps exp have been.

Sigh :(
WG

awww babe i meant it from an outside perceptive.

any girl in this biz knows what u do and thinks highly of it ;)

Ooooops, no one told told me there were going to be women reading this thread.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

just marry a real doll. they don't talk back.

The way I see it, any woman who's horrified at what I do probably isn't a good match in other ways. Unless you're just trying to get someone in bed once and damn the consequenecs or integrity, it seems to me that you might as well just be open about who you are and what you do. I mean, you probably don't want to discuss the gory details of the photoshoot that went wrong on a first date, but it can be done tactfully. And like I said, look at it as screening: anyone who won't date you because of the biz is not someone you'd want to be in a relationship with anyway.

-b

I think of it this way... I am who I am and the sooner a person figures out whether or not I'm the kind of person they can gel with, the better. I lay it all out on the table and if they can't deal with it then there's no point in trying.

Very tuff too do. I didn't tell mine for a few months and finally just did it. She really didn't like it but it is my job lol.

Wait, you mean you're not freaky? :(

:Oh crap

I couldnt agree more. If they can't handle it right off the bat...fuck 'em.

tell them the truth. anyone who can't deal with it isn't for you. eventually if they are not comfortable with it, it will become a problem. i blurt it straight out, no shame and normally joke about it. its a great way to make money.

freaky can be a good thing :P

I go about things in the same way with most everything in my life.If someone is going to judge you based on the work you do (or whatever the topic/situation might be) in a negative way then they are not the type of person i would want to have around me all the time anyway.It's better to deal with it right from the start and get it out of the way so that nobodys time is wasted.

well ok i have read alot of the comments here but we dont have an average job so when people think of porn in general they think of some sleasy greasy guy behind the camera making girls do what they dont want to do.. well you know the perception of our industry.. so just blurting out what you do may not be a good way to do it, of course educating people about what we do is a good method but well..

im not afraid to tell anyone, i just like to guage what type of person they are before i spend more time or want them to be in my friend circle..

ie if a girl is open minded u dont have to tell her right away but after a few days you can sorta feel her out and then tell her, but i think its the way you tell her and the way you present our industry.. since everyone hates porn right? :P

The first thing i learned when i moved to LA,is that some chicks,even the most conservative and subdued,actually like guys in the adult internet industry. Its so taboo for them and they love telling their girlfriends that their man is in the adult industry.

however,if your talent,your fucked...most peeps cant deal with the fact your gonna be hooking up w/ other peeps for money.

I am very honest about what i do ... you don't like it, we are not a good match. To be honest i think my job played a part in my divorce. People who are not in the industry think i am at work all day having an orgy.

But i am now dating someone in the industry who is Behind the scenes as well ... he is a post-prduction director. He understands i am not at work having an orgy and also understands my stress level and sometimes long hours. So far for me, i have discovered it works out best for me to date someone who knows my industry.

Wish i could be more helpful ... But all dating sucks! LOL

xoxo,
Megan

I just tell them the truth...... if they are put off by it, I don't wanna date them anyway. There are 3,000,000,000 women on this planet, so who cares if 1 or 10 or 100 or 100,000 say "no"

ROFL lets just say I'm VERY comfortable with my sexuality. :pimp

i tell them i work in porn, i dont want to be with someone who cannot accept that, porn is no big deal to me and my place of business should not matter to anyway else.

tell the truth, why would you want to be with some prissy little thing anyway?

i tell them i work in porn, i dont want to be with someone who cannot accept that, porn is no big deal to me and my place of business should not matter to anyway else.

tell the truth, why would you want to be with some prissy little thing anyway?

This is a sticky situation and Gateway, I'm totally with you. I went through a 6 month dry spell where every time I told a woman I work in porn (especially my niche), they freaked the fuck out.

99% of the time, I'm not the first bit concerned what a woman thinks about what I do. I just tell them I'm in Internet marketing and leave it at that. If they push, I tell them that I help people sell things online. It's honest and if all I want to do is fuck her, it's enough. If she really pushes or I think it'll help the cause I tell her the whole truth. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't.

It's that 1% that gets really, really tricky. If I'm interested in more than just fucking a girl, my policy is 100% honesty. It's hard and it's cost me more than I'd care to remember, but as a good man once said, "I am who I am."

All us sad sack single sons of bitches will just have to put faith in Jehovah, Allah, Buddah, Shakti, Mary, Xochiquetzal, Bmola, Kuan Yin, Zoroaster, Hathor, Turan, Eros, Ama-no-Uzume, Freya, Juno and let's not forget hahaha8216;Athtart that one day we'll meet an intelligent, open-minded, beautiful, committed, honest, loyal sexual dynamo who wants nothing more than to love us.

unless you are shooting content or fucking the girls i don't see why women have such a big beef with it. are the girls your dating so uptight they can't handle you looking at naked women? personally i'd just say fuck em. they wouldn't mesh with the person i am at all if they can't handle something as small as that. not many girls i've told have had any problem with it, and the one that did only did until she saw what i actually did. so many have misconceptions about it all.

i was thinking this myself, i have never actually met a woman that i dated that had anykind of problem with it,

most were intrigued because they figured id be good in bed to go along with it, which i am.

i brought my current bf into the industry, i guess, since he's my photographer now

exboyfriend was jealous, didn't like it, barely talked about it and got angry-white-boy red whenever i mentioned it

if someone is going to judge you for working in porn, why would you want them anyway?

thanks for all the advice. i think im just gonna fuck her and forget about the long term relationship ;P

I love the text on your home page!

actually playing icewind dale 2 tonight 8) DDO SOON!

That is 100%.

now a girl that can play videos games ACE! ;P

Mine wouldn't freak out, they would just sit in an obvious state of total discomfort. Then of course, they go home, talk with friends, and never call again.

Those of you saying they should be cool with it have to consider that they have no idea what we do. When you tell them, they have a different spin in their heads. IMO.

Yup, now I just have to finally finish Baldur's Gate II and I'll be a total hit with the ladies.

:1orglaugh I guess it's a added bonus if yea all all your teeth too..

Sweet. Wanna go for a date??? I'm near Vancouver.....LOL :1orglaugh Just kidding, though I do think you seem like one of the most level headed women on here.

Hey Gateway, is this that same chick that I'm thinking of? If so, you need to pass the dutchie on the left hand side bro.. she was cute! =) Let me know when it's my turn..

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh . . . just wait until you try and explain the POV vids yer doing

yikes!!!!:helpme

I'm wondering if those of you who have problems with this somehow make your job seem glamorous? Somebody asks about my job and I say its a boring computer job with a few cool perks (trips, etc), which it is. I sit behind a computer all day staring at brackets and less than signs. How could anybody possibly find that sexy or risque?

I don't like to tell people at all, for some reason when I say webmastering they always think that I am IN it, like actually doing porn and posing naked, WTF.

A lot of people have no idea what webmastering is or that it exists. They always think that I am DOING it, which I'm not and never would.