Are You Serious???
 

Well are you? Do you take your business seriously? And if so.... how seriously? Is too serious a bad thing? Where do you draw the line? Where is the release point?

I ask this because of something that has happened to me.

The last few weeks have been a complete fucking nightmare for me. And totally unnecessary. I've been in the hospital.... I've been on heavy prescriptions.... I've been down and completely out of commission because of this shit.

Well, I figured out.... it wasn't the goddamned fish. It was me.

I did this entirely to myself. I've been covered with hives and having serious chest pain and all kinds of bad shit.... because of my own mind. There has to be limitations. Taking your business seriously is a good thing.... and stress is a good thing... but the kind of stress I've had for the last 2 weeks + is not the good kind. And there's absolutely no reason for it.

I found the solution to all of this last night. Had me a serious little heart to heart with my own brain. Because I had to know why the fuck this was causing me so many problems.... PHYSICAL problems.... it's not like I've never had to deal with shit before... I have a pretty ugly background.... I've been through a war... if that isn't stress, nothing is.

So, what I learned was.... I gotta let go a little. I can't save the world. I can't do everything overnight. And I don't need to worry about why. Because it just doesn't matter.

Take your business seriously in order to advance it.... but know when to draw the line. 3 days at a time in a chair working nonstop is NOT the answer. Don't let this happen to you. Or rather... don't let yourself do this to you. I guarantee you will burn the fuck out... and fast.

The mind can be a horrible thing if it gets out of control.... mine turned into a fucking monster. But thankfully I got it back last night before it completely snapped. It was very close....

That's all I got... :smokin

amp smoke a fattie :stoned

Puts shit in perspective for me every time

-Dr. Tree M.D.

so true. im nowhere near the stage of most of you but i really do push myself to the limit as far as sleep etc. goes. i cant go to sleep sometimes at 3 in the morning coz im thinking about what sponsors to try next etc... its hard to not think about it though. :)

Welcome to my world :o)

I have had such a rude revelation myself and am still trying to work on a good balance of work,exersise,fun and famaliy.

Easy solution: take a few benzos every day

Amp, I hear ya man. I really hear ya.... :(

Just one of the reasons why I stepped away from this biz for now... too much shit to do and the damn day has only 24 hours.

As soon as I reorder my life and find the right balance, I'm gettin back. But for now I'm really really enjoying myself.

Suggestion:
Take a vacation, go somewhere where you can completely relax and won't get disturbed.

This was something I learned in a karate kid movie
It's okay to work hard for a while but you have to balance it out with some fun stuff. I'd rather be broke and happy than rich and stuck in a hospital

I honestly think I'm a workaholic... even though everyone here thinks I'm just busting my nuts posting @ boards. :)

I actually have too much to do... I'm stressed out. I need a relief.
But, no... I just got me some new projects to work on, while the rest aren't even completed yet. :(

On top of this, I have to go to classes (now I had to buy a laptop so I can work during breaks and such)... I think this is serious.

My GF bitches like hell... But, what the hell.. atleast I don't have time to cheat on her. She has though. :)

When I have a burnout, then I do... that's the perfect time to take a break.

AVN published last year an article about wife and her husband, both were webmasters - working together about 24/7 $$$ in sight. They planned about holidays, trips weekend offs etc. but they just skipped relaxing and worked worked worked until husband died because of some kind of stress. The article was written by wife about a one year after... I feel really sorry for her.

Think about $$$ but think a bit more about your wife / husband / friends and take some time for yourself.

you can't make me.:thefinger

very true amp! I would like to add that most of the time when
you get in this more, more, more circle it will not improve your
business either...you spend more time being busy and figuring out what to do next or what still needs to be done that you lose percpective.....

Taking the time and moving away from it helps you to look at it
from a distance and to get new views on stuff. When you're only
busting your balls you lose that....same for coding...when I encounter a problem which I can't solve in the beginning I kept breaking my brains on it....now..I stop walk away play some golf
and look at it again when I get back. 9 out of 10 times I solve the
problem very fast. It was something small that was overlooked
or I started thinking to complicated....

Once you lose sight on the stuff that you are doing because you don't allow you the time for it and getting too busy with stuff you think is very important you're heading the wrong way...

Within no time you have too many things and by trying to everything you'll only do them half which not brings the result it could have....you notice it and start even working harder to catch up...but all that happens is you lose productivity, efficiency and you lose the view you need in order to understand what it really was that you were trying to do....

the pile gets bigger, the stress gets higher, you see business sliding down and yet you still think the only way to solve is by working more....

Many succesful companies get killed by their success.... planning,
knowing when to say no, allowing you to take time to do stuff.
That's the most hard thing to get under control...

More hours working does not necesarely result in better results.
Giving your best is one.....getting the best out of yourself is another!

just my thoughts.....I might be very wrong! :1orglaugh

DynaMite

Funny this post comes up now...cause I am seriously going to Mexico (Merida to be exact) to look at possibly living there for half the year or a few years solid....My wife and I are going in May, already scoped out a few houses.....

Together we make enough money to keep us very happy...christ she makes about $120k herself.....so what I do is purely a bonus (although I do make more...lol)

A month ago someone was telling me how they had been saving for 20 years to finally be able to winter in mexico and only work a few month outta the year...I thought "good plan!!"
Then I realized fuck why even work the 20 years to get to that point do it right now......So I started researching and found a nice city in mexico with lots of culture and yes high speed connections....so fuck it...I think I am gonna go, at least for a year...get a dusty pickup truck and eat mangos everyday while doing a moderate amount of work sitting in my hammock with the wireless on...while I watch parrots and monkeys swinging through the trees.

I understand that this is not for everyone...The amercian dream kills a lot of people, they strive for 6 cars, two houses, and 4 kids or 4 wives for that matter.....fuck that...I will technically be able to retire soon....and enjoy life for what matters...LIVING IT!!!

Damn that was an Oprah moment if I ever had one....

Absolutely... you guys are right on the money. :thumbsup

and now that I have my grasp firmly on reality again, I can focus on getting my ass moved to Maui this fall to spend the rest of my natural days overlooking that beautiful fucking blue water.... :winkwink:

only 3 more weeks until Maui and I are reunited, and I am one with my surfboard. :smokin

hehehe I did the same....but My America was Amsterdam and My Mexico is Spain :thumbsup

DynaMite

i love happy endings, sniff :waaaaahh

I am so hip. I have to force myself to take regular breaks during the day. And no more staying up for more that 24 hours, Fuck that'll kill anyone by itself. point is.... I'm old now (31) and can't justify shit with, " well, I used to stay up all night drinking with my friends, so I should be able to do this." It's just not the same when you are working on building a future for your family and yourself.

Amen, Amp. Glad to know I'm not alone in this. My chest hurts, I'm gonna take a break, and eat a leisurly breakfast. Peace.

Turbo

:D

I just did some self-analyzing while taking a dump.
I realized I think of this shit too much. It's not so bad when everything is going fine, but if some of my sites aren't doing well... I think of them even when I'm nowhere near a computer. I can't get peace until everything is perfect... and as you all know, it's never perfect.

"I used to worry about pornsite, but then I got high...."
I should too I think.

how true, the key is not how hard you work, but how well you work. and most importantly, how much you enjoy your work. you can get ruin your health chasing sucess, (i got my first ulser at 18) if ur smart you realize your busting your ass for paper (thats all $ is after all). keeping it all in perspective is more important than how much you make

I find it's important to switch between projects. Don't spend too long focussing completely on one thing. Mix in some things that you know you're going to enjoy working on. And make sure you step away sometimes, even though that's much harder than it sounds. :winkwink:

No..... I'm Batman!

I was made rudely aware last night that I am in fact NOT Batman. :eek7

Did you meet the real Batman?

I was bitch slapped by my own brain.

That fucker sure knows how to slap hard! It got my full attention.

Yeah I know. I left mine in the barn where I lost my virginity and realized porn is good. My mind has been wandering since.

Amp, don't try tricking these people.

If you don't work like mad for at least a yr strait, you'll never get the foothold you need to succeed. it really should be 2 yrs strait.
oh sure, you'll make a little money. big deal.

hehehe... so true.... but I've also just rediscovered that I can twist my Bose 6 pack up here to full volume and open all the windows.... and it feels pretty fucking good to salute my neighbors & laugh. :thumbsup

Amp, it's struck me for quite a while that you take things more seriously than you should. You're strident, you dump on people, you seem intent on winning every single exchange. I was that way once. One has to learn to let go of his ego a bit. No one really wants to hang with a guy who seems to feel he has to be one up on EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN EVERY SINGLE EXCHANGE.

As someone else who has done creative work all my life, and has often been accused of being egotistical, I have to admit that largely I am. As you know, I'm sure, the creative person, and especially one working in a field such as ours, needs to be sure enough of himself and his judgments to resist all the temptations and exhortations to be less different and settle into the mediocrity of blandness and "me too"-ism.

I know on several occasions I've made some comments and gone back and forth with you on this issue and that, but I've sensed that you were not going to stop until you dealt a death blow or got me to cry "uncle," which is no way to make friends (as well as betraying an obsessive-compulsive side), so I have told myself I have no need to get involved in a classic pissing contest.

I've been online since long before the Internet was a twinkle in some Pentagon idiot's eye (the irony of that gives me much satisfaction), and I've flamed and been flamed, and now I'm beyond that.

No one's life is at stake here, this is just a bullshit board with a bunch of bullshitters (check out the domain name, after all), and while, sure, it's not all BS, a fair amount of it is. And chief among the bullshitters in life are the ones who will stop at nothing to win an argument. So, be witty as you frequently are, but also be wise: we do not wake up in the morning hoping to receive the back of your hand, and I know you're talented enough to gain our respect out of admiration rather than fear.

Lighten up: you'll live longer.

cool.... but it had nothing to do with a messageboard. It was all about what I do behind the board. This shit here is just bonus... I come here to have fun.

but you nailed the personality right on the head. :thumbsup

I ate too much cake...

actually, I've been in a similar boat as Amp....
I've been killing myself and not paying much attention to my body...I've had a terrible diet, unhealthy sleep patterns and attrocious exercise habits......

the reason I had to take this recent trip to Arizona the last week or so was to get myself un-stressed...unfortunately, it caused me some business problems, but I guess the alternative (a heart attack) wasn't something I was looking forward to...

I have a friend who's studying suplements, viatmins,health etc. and putting me on a strict diet, exercise regimine and pushing for better sleeping habits (I've been living on 4-5 hours of sleep since college)..

I feel better on that much sleep to be honest... I sleep much longer and I feel crappy... I read somewhere that 4-6 hrs of sleep was more than enough for the body... seems to work best for me...

But then there's the days I sleep like 12 hrs to make up for the weeks of little to no sleep :) Take very strong Garlic pills, 1500 mg... I take one daily

I'm telling you.... unless you are in really bad health... out of shape or something like that... supplements and drugs and shit are not the answer. That is not the key to maintaining a healthy mind.

ALL problems are created in the mind. Not some.... not a few with outside factors influencing them.... not a couple based on some condition of universal influx and bad mojo.... ALL PROBLEMS ARE CREATED IN THE MIND. And all problems are solved in the mind.

What happened to me physically was done completely because of my own thought patterns. As soon as I modified my thought pattern last night back to a healthy one... it all went away.

I've spent years reading different and various philosophies, and that is the only thing that finally saved me. I would be in the hospital today if I hadn't been able to pull on that and put shit back into perspective immediately. No joke. Because I was sitting here last night shaking uncontrollably and drooling.... completely unable to function any further or even speak. That was the break point.

Might sound funny... (and it kinda is....) but it's real shit. The mind can seriously fuck you if you let it.

OK, bro, where do I go for enlightenment? Seriously, I could use a good brain scrub. I've had a few days where I thought I would go fucking ape shit. I'm open to any suggestions...

The two I rely on most heavily are Tao Te Ching and Zen... (they're pretty close)... it's not religion.... just good fucking brainwaves man. :smokin

"Amp, it's struck me for quite a while that you take things more seriously than you should. You're strident, you dump on people, you seem intent on winning every single exchange. I was that way once. One has to learn to let go of his ego a bit. No one really wants to hang with a guy who seems to feel he has to be one up on EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN EVERY SINGLE EXCHANGE. "
------------------------------------------------

Ego's not a bad thing at all, I'm sure Bill Gates, Jack Welch, and lots of other people can attest to that. Nor is being ambitious, especially when you are smart enough to realize your ambitions.

A competitive nature is what you describe. Of course you could also be describing Michael Jordan, Carl Lewis, any of those top caliber competitors in both sports and business.

Hmmm

In truthful self-analysis.... I'm honestly probably around 10% ego... the rest is raw confidence. I know what I can do and what I can't. I don't need my ego fed every day.

So this is wrong:
I'm not really lookin' for people to "hang" with me anyway.... I'm 35. Not 16.

In a way, it's death that means that none of this is really real, if by real you mean something that will last. Of all things it can be said, 'This, too shall pass,' and that includes all of our problems. And, as you say, all of our problems are not really real, either, for they are in our heads. A lot of our stress is caused by trying to control everything, trying to win everything, trying, trying, trying. Of course, nothing happens without some effort, but at the same time (and embracing a contradiction) many of the best things that happen are effortless. (Either they simply come naturally to us, or they are serendipitous.)

It's good to hear you're on the right track.

==============================================

I don't know if you are fucking around Ron, but I know on my end with the stress we go through here, those 2 years have flown.

I happen to think your post hits it on the nose.

Try the Dhammapada - its simple yet profound Buddhist philosophy, and can be really relevant to a lot of situations. RThe Tao Te Ching is good too.

Wierdly enough, I had a similar type of thing happen yesterday. Recently I've been doing the equivalent to two jobs; one day job, something I committed myself to while I was unemployed last year and also my own adult stuff. I've been fucking stressed.

yesterday evening a crazy burn-like mark just appeared on my forehead! A vertical line about 2cm long and a coupla mm wide... Doesn't hurt at all but it was really freaking the fuck out of me!

Now maybe I'm thinking it might me my brain trying to get my attention... Maybe I should slow down a bit too. I hope it goes though 'cos its fucking ugly...

oh, I know those things alone aren't going to be a cure all....but supplements and vitamins combined with healthier eating habits, better rest, more exercise, etc. help lead to better health (physical and mental)

my back hurts.

Nz

Amp, The Toa of Pooh was my introduction to Taoism and as corny as it sounds it really did help me break a cycle of depression and self loathing that lasted for more than 3 years.

I've seen it, but never read it.... but as long as it's based on the real deal, (an interpretation of one kind), then yeah.... it's amazing what that stuff can do for you if you are able to absorb that sort of thing. Some people can't. :thumbsup

Wow, man after 1,5 year non-stop working. I go to Isla Margaritha next week. I hope my body will survive that.
After 1,5 full working 2 weeks no stress. I hope i have no could turkey on the island.
Good luck Apm i hope you find some balance in your work/personal live. take the warning of your body serious man and relax a view weeks.

My first intro to Zen was; "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance." It fucked up my formal christian upbringing but good. It was kinda like a huge Attitude Adjustment or a serious serious little heart to heart with my own brain as Amp put it. Got me out of my own shit too and it put things into perspective for me...

To get in the mood, you can watch my Isla Margarita pics....
http://www.dynamite.st/pics.php have fun it's a nice place!
Make sure to visit HOOTERS it's a dutch bar that also can be found
on the rembrandts square in Amsterdam.....Great Place!

DynaMite

Thanks Dyn, How is the controle at the aiport? only see your pasport and walk trhough?. maybe i wanna take some dutch weed with me.