What is your favorite Saturday Night Live skit?
 

I think this one is mine:

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White Like Eddie

.....Eddie Murphy
Clerk.....Jim Downey


Eddie Murphy: You know, a lot of people talk about racial prejudice. And some people have gone so far as to say that there are actually two Americas: one black and one white. But talk is cheap. So I decided to look into the problem myself, firsthand. To go underground and actually experience America.. as a white man.

[ enters Make Up Room ]

Eddie Murphy Voiceover: I hired the best make-up people in the business. If I was gonna pass as a white man, everything had to be perfect.

[ make-up is placed on Eddie's face ]

Eddie Murphy: Hmm, I think that's a little light.

Make-up Artist: Okay, let's try this. [ applies fake white moustache on Eddie's lips ]

Eddie Murphy: That's, uh.. I look kind of Harry Reemsish.

Make-up Artist: Mmm, I like it.

Eddie Murphy: I studied for my role very carefully. I watched lots of "Dynasty".

[ show Eddie watching TV ]

Eddie Murphy: See? See how they walk? Their butts are real tight when they walk. They keep their butts tight. I've gotta remember to keep my butt real tight when I walk.

Eddie Murphy Voiceover: And, I read a whole bunch of Hallmark Cards.

[ show Eddie reading greeting cards ]

Eddie Murphy: "For my lovely wife." That's it. That's it. That's it. Go ahead. "You always mean lots more to me than you could ever guess. For you have done so much to fill my life with happiness."

Eddie Murphy Voiceover: Finally, I was ready.

[ Eddie walks onto the street, the perfect portrait of a white man. He enters a convenience store, grabs a newspaper and drops it on the counter. ]

Clerk: What are you doing?

Eddie Murphy: I'm buying this newspaper.

Clerk: That's all right. There's nobody around. Go ahead, take it. Take it. [ Eddie gives him a quizzical look ] Go ahead, take it. Yeah. Take it. Take it.

[ Eddie takes the newspaper, and cautiously exits ]

Eddie Murphy Voiceover: Slowly, I began to realize that when white people are alone, they give things to each other for free.
[ cut to Eddie catching a bus. He sits down between two white women. ]

Eddie Murphy Voiceover: There was only one other black man on the bus. He got off on 45th Street. [ the busdriver looks around the bus carefully, then sets a party in motion, complete with music and cigarette girls ] The problem was much more serious than I'd ever imagined.

[ cut to Eddie at a bank, talking to a black Loan Officer ]

Loan Officer: Now, let me get this straight, Mr., ..uh.. Mr. White. You'd like to borrow $50,000 from our bank, but you have no collateral, you have no credit. You don't even have any I.D. Is that correct?

Eddie Murphy: That's right.

Loan Officer: Mr. White, I'm sorry. This is not a charity. This is a business..

White Loan Officer: Uh, Harry, why don't you, uh, take your break now? I'll take care of.. uh.. Mr. White.

Loan Officer: Well.. okay. Thanks, Bob. [ exits ]

White Loan Officer: [ laughs, then sits ] That was a close one, wasn't it?

Eddie Murphy: It certainly was.

White Loan Officer: We don't have to bother with these formalities, do we, Mr. White? Huh?

Eddie Murphy: What a silly Negro!

White Loan Officer: Just take what you want, Mr. White. Pay us back anytime. Or don't. We don't care.

Eddie Murphy: Tell me, do you know of any other banks like this in this area?

[ cut to Eddie back at the Make-up Room ]

Eddie Murphy: So, what did I learn from all of this? Well, I learned that we still have a very long way to go in this country before all men are truly equal. But I'll tell you something. [ pan to reveal Eddie's black buddies applying white make-up to their faces ] I've got a lot of friends, and we've got a lot of makeup. So, the next time you're huggin' up with some really super, groovy white guy, or you met a really great, super keen white chick, don't be too sure. They might be black.

[ fade to black ]

There are so many...the Coneheads, Gumby, Copy Guy, Bill Murray's lounge singer, the Church Lady, Wayne's World...

Samurai Delicatessen always made me laugh...

http://www.bbring.com/pics/sd/sd8.jpg

ADG Webmaster

velvet jones- how to be a high class ho!

More Cowbell.

Velvet Jones: Who among us has not dreamed of faraway places and intertwined lovers? Hi, I'm Velvet Jones. And if you love love as much as I do, I know you will want to buy my latest Velvet Jones Harlequin romance books. There are many exquisite titles to choose from, such as.. [ holds up book titled Velvet Love ] ..Velvet Love. Listen:

[ romantic music plays in the background, as Velvet reads a passage from Velvet Love ]

"When she touched her lips to the glass, Lawanda's heart beat inside her. I knew from that very first moment that the three dollars I had spent on wine would not go to waste."

[ puts down book, romantic music stops ]

Wasn't that romantic? But wait, there's more. Allow me to read from one of my personal favorites:

[ romantic music starts again, Velvet reads from book entitled A Touch of Velvet ]

"I saw her standing at the gates of the Lincoln Tunnel. Dare I approach her? My heart pounded inside my chest. I felt a burning in my loins I had never felt before. Thus, I realized I had been.. [ puts down book and picks up another one, entitled Kicked in the Butt by Love ] ..Kicked in the Butt by Love.

[ romantic music stops ]

Yes, endless evenings of romance can all be yours, if you order now.

Announcer: [ reading directions on screen ] Rush $5.95 to Velvet Jones, Brooklyn, New York.

Velvet Jones: Who wrote the book of love? Velvet. It's as simple as that.

The rock and his quit smoking skit

anything with will farrel. guy is a total clown. i love it.

Irwin Mainway, Dan Aykroyd as the sleazy businessman that marketed dangerous products to children.

the chris falrey motivational speaker character always cracks me up

"LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!"

Nothing compares to the old SNL..so many great skits

The check brothers two wild and crazy guys and the original point -point counter point.

Eddie Murphy spoofing Mr. Rogers was classic stuff.

Oh that one where they are in a greek delicatessan, and they order the Gyros. They then keep going SOoo, you like a the juice? The juice, it is a good eh?

Oh man that cracks me up.

Alec Baldwin's Schweaty Balls on Delicious Dish
Bill Murray Singing Star Wars nothing but Star Wars. .
Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood was also a classic

Cyn

My favorite recurring skit was the Samurai, who always ended up with Buck Henry or Frank Zappa (although there was a memorable encounter the Samurai had with Charles Grodin).

As for an individual skit, Lucy Lawless' impersination of Steve Nicks for Stevie Nicks' Taco Hut... she did a great Stevie, and the writing was perfect, including the rewording of the songs to fit in with running a Tex/Mex place...

BUTTWHEAT HAS BEEN SHOT! :1orglaugh

Just about anything with eddie murphy was the best, i really dont think i've enjoyed SNL as much since he left, well except for the chris farley years

Chopping Broccoli

More COWBELL!

Colonel Angus

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/02/02mangus.phtml

I love the presidential impressions the best. I think Will Ferrell did George W., Dana Carvey as George Bush and I think it was Darrell Hammond as Clinton. Those always crack me up.

Clearly Cowbell :upsidedow

Back in the old days....

John Belushi and Dan Akroyd in the diner....

"No pepsi, coke."

the cowbell with walken & the black mr rogers neighborhood

I gots a fever.. and the only CURE is more cowbell.

:pimp

fuck i never saw the cowbell!

crap.

http://213.133.111.165/~gabriela/tex...skit_po_22.jpg

Guess what? I've got a FEVER! ..and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL!

Do a google search. I found it a few week's back. Full video of the cowbell sequence. I can't recall search terms off my head, but it was something like, "Blue Oyster Cult", and "Cowbell".

:pimp

"Yes, THE Bruce Dickenson..."
 

Walken...Cowbell...
http://homepage.mac.com/kellydean/Mu...Theater34.html

The cowbell skit has to be the best and the one with Will Ferrel playing Harry Caray in "Space the infinite Universe."
And Kattan playing Mr. Peepers is great too...

Any of the old stuff.

"Jane, you ignorant slut"

"Cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger"

Belushi as Joe Cocker

Rosanne Roseannadanna

Father Guido Sarduci

Eddie Murphy as Mr. Rogers.

Gilda as the old lady who would go "never mind" I can't remember any more of that one.

And Larry the Lobster.

Christ, I feel really old now.

i LOVE two wild and crazy guys!!!

I forgot "Land Shark" and "Coneheads". Killer Bees, too.

Michael Jordan with daily affirmation guy.

Many American girls enjoy my protruding buttocks all the time!

The one where Ferrell is taking a yogo class so he can become flexable enough to give himself head. He eventually gets there and then it goes from scene to scene over the years with him with his head in his sweat pants blowing himself.

I saw this skit and I just about shit myself!

Flow

I also like the one with Shannon Dougherty and Adam Sandler, where he is the pyscho ex boyfriend.

I'd have to go with the Chippendale's dancers skit with Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze.

FUCK! How could I forget Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

:thumbsup

I'm chillin' with Chris Rock

Will Ferrell-cheerleaders

Jim Carrey- Night at Roxbury

it's gotta be Will Ferrel and Dana Carvery playing bush Jr. and Sr.

that shit still cracks me up, and i have seen it many times.

like the sketch dude

you likea da juice no?

Emily Litella was the character's name. She was always complaining about things that sounded strange to her. Some of the best were her not understanding why people were opposed to "Sax and violins" on TV, and why people were so keen on preserving the country's natural "race horses" (What about other kinds of horses?)

And whenever she wanted to talk to Chevy Chase, she'd call him "Cheddar Cheese". And then they paired her up with Jane Curtin and she would do the "Ooooh, that's entirely different. Never mind." And then as Jane would close the news, she'd look at Jane and add "Bitch." to it. The truth is the first time Gilda did that, it was a complete ad-lib, but it got such a great reaction from the audience, they *had* to do it every time after that.

Ah Gilda surely is missed...

:1orglaugh
classic!! :thumbsup

i love all the skits with Spade & Farely together..they had awesome chemistry together.

I love the old SNL, particularly the time of John Belushi.

'chopping brocoli' and 'oklahoma'