AOL's new tactic for keeping people from canceling: fear
 

This is fucking hilarious, you would think with all the FTC fines they would learn their lesson. I just called to cancel an AOL account that I never use and it went like this.

Me: I'm calling to cancel my account.

AOL: Sure, I can help you with that. May I ask why you are canceling?

Me: Because I never use it.

AOL: I have to tell you, it would be very unwise for you to cancel.

Me: Why's that?

AOL: Because without our new award winning security software you will subject yourself to hackers and viruses in no time.

Me: Oh really?

AOL: Definitely. I see that you use a high speed connection, which means you are constantly connected to the internet and your IP address always stays the same. A huge recipe for hackers and viruses. Our new version 9.0 has security features in place to prevent that.

Me: Thats kinda scary.

AOL: I see that you are not using our latest version, may I ask why?

Me: Uhhh, because I never use it.

AOL: I'm willing to bet you already have viruses on your computer then, without our newest software you are a sitting duck.

Me: I'm not sure what a virus does, can you explain?

AOL: Has your computer ever locked up?

Me: Sometimes.

AOL: Yep. Ever been on a website and had popups?

Me: Popups? No, I've never heard my computer make popping noises.

AOL: No, have you ever been on a website and another website open in another window?

Me: Yes! Now that you mention it everytime I go to my favorite christian site a site called suckmydick.com comes up. Is that you guys doing that?

AOL: Not at all. Thats a virus. Thats why you need our software. I highly recommend you download version 9.0 and our security features will remove all viruses from your computer.

Me: Well to be honest, I'm starting to kinda like suckmydick.com

AOL: Look, I really want to help you. I'll give you 3 months free onto your account, if anything just so you can remove all the viruses.

Me: And then suckmydick.com will stop appearing on my computer?

AOL: Yes.

Me: If thats the case then I definitely want to cancel. You guys can't stop me from looking at suckmydick.com, whats up with that?

AOL: Please hold.....


:1orglaugh

lol now that was funny

The best way to cancel the account.

Say a minor in the house used your credit card to signup for the serivce. they will cancel the accout within 4 seconds

haha its fucking awesome to mess with dumbshit customer service reps.

Funny. Is that really how it went?

haha dummies at A O HELL.

Yep, and I was on hold the whole fucking time I typed that.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Good one, that's the way to handle those smarmy (yes, I said "smarmy") little reps. They prey on the gullible, old and computer-challenged and i'm sure it works 9 times out of 10.

I actually had an interview with them years ago. I had the manager I was meeting with believing I was at my current job every day by 7am and stayed late into the evening... I asked if there was any way he could schedule it earlier - he seemed none to please that we were going to meet at 5:30 am on a Monday morning (my only available time).

Monday at 6am I got a very angry voice mail at home. Then at 6:15 ... 6:25 ...

Hey, I was young and immature then, but it was sure fun!

its not a "new" tactic the employ...lol

That is too fucking funny :) :) :)