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-   -   Do you give 10% to GOD? (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=505754)

Donny 08-19-2005 10:52 AM

Do you give 10% to GOD?
 
I've been reading people posting about conversions being down. Maybe it's because they're not giving 10% to God.

Food for thought... God loves porn. He's been a recurring member of DonnysGirls.com since the site opened. He pardons my lack of giving because he likes seeing the virgins I post from time to time.

JD 08-19-2005 10:53 AM

yeah, 10% of my cock.

S P A N N O W 08-19-2005 10:53 AM

Of course, doesnt everyone?! :thumbsup

candyflip 08-19-2005 10:54 AM

tithe Audio pronunciation of "tithe" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (tth)
n.

1.
1. A tenth part of one's annual income contributed voluntarily or due as a tax, especially for the support of the clergy or church.
2. The institution or obligation of paying tithes.
2. A tax or assessment of one tenth.
3.
1. A tenth part.
2. A very small part.

After Shock Media 08-19-2005 10:54 AM

What does god need money for?

Tala 08-19-2005 10:54 AM

If god is so omnipotent, let him make his own money, he's not getting mine.

The Truth Hurts 08-19-2005 10:55 AM

once a month i go outside and throw all my cash up in the air....
whatever god wants he can take.
so far i'm only down $5

Donny 08-19-2005 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by After Shock Media
What does god need money for?


To keep his membership to Donny's Girls.

After Shock Media 08-19-2005 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DonovanPhillips
To keep his membership to Donny's Girls.

haha your girls are not that good, and besides god can make his own girls.

RuthB 08-19-2005 10:58 AM

I used to be Mormon, but not anymore :1orglaugh

Donny 08-19-2005 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by After Shock Media
haha your girls are not that good, and besides god can make his own girls.


God likes the "girl next door". He told me that if he wanted to see pornstars he'd go to LA. He prefers Chico.


(God really talks to me. Almost Daily.)

Donny 08-19-2005 11:12 AM

This isn't a joke. I know I started it sounding like it might be, but God really wants all of us to start donating 10% of our income to local churches.

Furious_Female 08-19-2005 11:33 AM

Sure I'd give God all my money if he (or she) wanted it. I won't give it to corrupt religions who steal and abuse in the name of God though.

Donny 08-19-2005 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Furious_Female
Sure I'd give God all my money if he (or she) wanted it. I won't give it to corrupt religions who steal and abuse in the name of God though.


God told me to tell you that if you're serious you can send him money via my pay pal account.

HarrytheNazi 08-19-2005 11:56 AM

I saw him in burrito once.

the alchemist 08-19-2005 11:57 AM

They have more than enough :2 cents:

MandyBlake 08-19-2005 11:58 AM

nope.
i guess i'm a bad person.

Donny 08-19-2005 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MandyBlake
nope.
i guess i'm a bad person.


God says it's not too late, my sister. I am his official offering plate on gfy. Let's pass around my Pay Pal email address and contribute your 10% to it.

Rui 08-19-2005 12:22 PM

The only thing "God" gets from me is the finger every now and then...

Brujah 08-19-2005 12:30 PM

I'm dyslexic.. but yes, I give my DOG 10%.. he's never used any of it yet though. Sometimes, when I get hungry I'll crack into it for a pizza.

WarChild 08-19-2005 12:33 PM

I figure that when the Apocalypse comes, well, even Satan can't do it alone. The Devil's going to need a few good Lieutenants.

Expect to see me harvesting souls and smiling.

Rui 08-19-2005 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WarChild
I figure that when the Apocalypse comes, well, even Satan can't do it alone. The Devil's going to need a few good Lieutenants.

Expect to see me harvesting souls and smiling.

I don't know why a post like this coming from somebody with the nick "Warchild" doesn't suprise me :winkwink: ehehe

WarChild 08-19-2005 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rui
I don't know why a post like this coming from somebody with the nick "Warchild" doesn't suprise me :winkwink: ehehe

http://www.warchild.org/artists/pavarott/pav1996.gif

Rui 08-19-2005 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WarChild

http://www.psychotica.net/evb/comica...l-warchild.JPG

WarChild 08-19-2005 01:19 PM

Seriously though .. We know of Archangel Gabriel. He's one bad ass Angel, right? Well if god needs Archangels, then it stands to reason that the Devil must have some seriously bad ass demons fighting on his side too, right?

And ins't the Devil supposed to be actively seeking evil doers and harvesting their souls, anyway? How come nobody's approached me? Seriously, give me a few demon powers and I'll make fucking minced meat out of a ton of people, starting with members of this board. Why wouldn't the Devil be jumping at this offer?

Maybe none of it's real?

woj 08-19-2005 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by After Shock Media
What does god need money for?

yea, no kidding, isn't the church the wealthiest group/organization in the world as it is?

Rui 08-19-2005 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by woj
yea, no kidding, isn't the church the wealthiest group/organization in the world as it is?

Answer:

http://www.georgeblowfish.com/prostitute.jpg

+

http://www.uscg.mil/pacarea/news/pto...EY%20FORGE.jpg

+

http://andy.pudmenzky.com/images/per...2005/booze.jpg

Donny 08-19-2005 03:22 PM

God doesn't like some of ya'lls attitudes in this thread...

Rui 08-19-2005 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DonovanPhillips
God doesn't like some of ya'lls attitudes in this thread...

Did you had a one-on-one with him? :Oh crap

Donny 08-19-2005 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rui
Did you had a one-on-one with him? :Oh crap


Yes. He knows me well. He's a GOLD member of my sites.

Tat2Jr 08-19-2005 04:08 PM

With the erosion of the seperation of church and state, I'm sure 10% of my taxes goes to god somehow.

NickPapageorgio 08-19-2005 04:08 PM

More blood spilled in the name of religion than anything else in the history of the world? Nah...I'll be keeping my 10% thanks. :)

After Shock Media 08-19-2005 04:11 PM

I just got back from a meeting with the other gods, they are not to keen on the christian god getting all of the money so they too have asked for their 10% each. Oh they also said they want 10% gross not net, and thats 10% before you deduct the christian gods cut too. *just passing it along.
They did mention they do like chico girls though, I was kind of amazed.

Donny 08-19-2005 04:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by After Shock Media
I just got back from a meeting with the other gods, they are not to keen on the christian god getting all of the money so they too have asked for their 10% each. Oh they also said they want 10% gross not net, and thats 10% before you deduct the christian gods cut too. *just passing it along.
They did mention they do like chico girls though, I was kind of amazed.


Well today I talked to GOD God. He said he was the GOD of all gods. He said to disregard anything the other gods said 'cause they're just trying to stir up shit like Satan did before he was cast out of heaven.

After Shock Media 08-19-2005 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DonovanPhillips
Well today I talked to GOD God. He said he was the GOD of all gods. He said to disregard anything the other gods said 'cause they're just trying to stir up shit like Satan did before he was cast out of heaven.

And thus the war's begun.

Please note the other god's now need money despretly to fund this war. They promise to fight here on earth among men and women so you can see what your money has bought.

Rui 08-19-2005 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DonovanPhillips
Yes. He knows me well. He's a GOLD member of my sites.

so besides fucking whores, doing hard drugs and beeing a alchoolic he also joins porn paysites :helpme

llporter 08-19-2005 04:49 PM

The honest answer is that I don't give 10% but I throw a $20 in the collection plate every Sunday. Guess it is the guilt from my Catholic mother.


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