Dating Rituals
 

DATING RITUALS

WHITE WOMEN

First date: You get to kiss her goodnight

Second date: You get to grope all over and make out

Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.



IRISH WOMEN

First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex

Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex

20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.



ITALIAN WOMEN

First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant

Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs

Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-karat ring

5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex

6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.



JEWISH WOMEN

First Date: You get dynamite head

Second Date: You get more great head

Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.



CHINESE WOMEN

First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens

Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again

Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you already realized nothing is going to happen.



INDIAN WOMEN

First date: Meet her parents

Second date: Set the date of the wedding

Third date: Wedding night.



BLACK WOMEN

First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner

Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner

Third Date: You get to pay her rent

Tenth Date: She's pregnant by someone other than you.



MEXICAN WOMEN

First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car

Second Date: She's pregnant

Third Date: She moves in. One week later: her mother, father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her father's girlfriend's mother, her two cousins, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Rio Grande.

The "POINT" .

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE IRISH WOMEN?

irish women do rock......amen

ROFL!!!!! :1orglaugh

LOL. That is too damn funny.

Lol, that's pretty good.

hahaa nice one

hahahaha

Thanks for the helpful tips man!

i wish the "funny" emails people send me were actually as funny as this one :thumbsup

:1orglaugh So true..that's why I prefer Irish women

I should send your email address to the people who send me funny emails. They sent me this like five times already.

rofl..some funny shit you got there

cool tips man, am learning now. hahaha

haha I love it, those are great.

You forgot one:

Prostitute

1st date: It costs you the price of dinner, you get the exact sex YOU want, when YOU are done the date is over, you go home with a smile on your face, never have to see/speak to her again.

2nd Date: find another different "flavor" whore, repeat.
3rd date: find another different flavor whore, repeat.

Result:
Live happily ever after getting exactly what you paid for and NOT losing half on the trade-In, and NOT having eighteen years of weekly payments.

The point?
Now you know why Prostitution is the oldest profession in the world. Every deal is fair, because everyone gets exactly what they want and feels good afterward.

/me packing bags and moving to Ireland ;)

that's a nice one! :laugh: i'll hunt for the irishes from now on.

hahahaha :1orglaugh