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Yo Adrian

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#1

Married Men that Webmaster from Home (RANT!)

03-10-2005, 09:08 AM

Does your wife ever get all over your shit because she doesn't realize that the time you spend online is WORK and that it's necessary to pay the BILLS?

We just moved into a new home, the move cost me 2 weeks of offline time, wifey's a stay at home mom. The minute my broadband got connected I've been working long hours to catch up.

Makes sense right? Spending time working to pay the bills after a long & expensive move?

But just because of the fact that I'm HOME makes her think I'm just messin' around.. "chatting" as she calls it. Keeps bitching at me to help her around the house.

I told her if I don't work, we can't pay the rent. Pissed her off, she thinks I'm being a drama queen. Something tells me that I may be in the market to lease some office space soon.

This happen to anyone else, or am I really just being a dick about it?

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Kevsh

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#2

03-10-2005, 09:10 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

Makes sense right? Spending time working to pay the bills after a long & expensive move?

Makes sense to me, but just to smooth things over take her out for a nice romantic dinner and DON'T spend the night staring at your watch or talking about work!
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hydro

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#3

03-10-2005, 09:10 AM

slap da ho in line!

nah seriously your not being a dick abot it, 2 weeks of not working is alot of catch up work to do. What you should do when you catch up is have your wife do your work for 3 days and see what she thinks of it
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MikeB

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#4

03-10-2005, 09:10 AM

I would say her reaction is not uncommon, I've seen it before. The fact of being in a physical office away from the house seems to justify whatever you do as being more legitimate work, even though you are doing the same thing.
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triumph

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#5

03-10-2005, 09:11 AM

I can relate, my wife is also a stay home mother of three, and my work requires as much time input as possible! But they never understand.
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#6

03-10-2005, 09:11 AM

Marriage.

http://noMarriage.com

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Spunky

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#7

03-10-2005, 09:11 AM

Buy her a nice gift or boot her ass out

YOUR INFORMATION HERE
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#8

03-10-2005, 09:11 AM

yes

http://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=442140

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sickkittens

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#9

03-10-2005, 09:11 AM

How about "what have you done around the house? You were home all day."

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Yo Adrian

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#10

03-10-2005, 09:12 AM

Originally posted by Kevsh

Makes sense to me, but just to smooth things over take her out for a nice romantic dinner and DON'T spend the night staring at your watch or talking about work!

Good advice, I've actually taken her out to some fantastic restaurants every night so far since the move. No looking at my watch, just enjoying ourselves. The second we get home.. "you gonna start chatting again already?"

aaaargg

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#11

03-10-2005, 09:12 AM

I think this happens to ALL of us. I fucking hate it too.

I'm just a newbie.
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sickkittens

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#12

03-10-2005, 09:13 AM

What is worse is when friends think they can call or come over or expect me to go out at any time because I "work for myself".

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FunForOne

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#13

03-10-2005, 09:13 AM

we talked about this yesterday.

This is a big cause of stress at our house.

"I wish I could just at home all day"
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#14

03-10-2005, 09:13 AM

Originally posted by GiantGnome

yes

http://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=442140

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Yo Adrian

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#15

03-10-2005, 09:14 AM

Originally posted by GiantGnome

yes

http://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=442140

Your sig disturbs me

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#16

03-10-2005, 09:14 AM

I deal with that too now
office space seemsl ike a good idea aswell :/

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GiantGnome

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#17

03-10-2005, 09:15 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

Your sig disturbs me

Im looking for a new one that I saw the other night. Peter made orange juice by squeezing the oranges on his man boobs.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-Darth Vader
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#18

03-10-2005, 09:16 AM

I'm not married but when I started doing this full time I had several friends all of a sudden asking for tons of favors. Could I pick up thier kids or watch thier kids one afternoon? Can I go get something for them. Can I do this? Can I do that? When I would say something about working they would say that I didn't have a real job so I had time. Finally I told them from 9-5 I would not be availible and I would not be answering the phone that I worked more hours then they did, I just ended up doing half the night because I was doing thier shit during the day.

I think a lot of people feel like if you don't leave the house for work, you are not working.
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#19

03-10-2005, 09:16 AM

<-- great show, why was it cancelled?!

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Maximillion

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#20

03-10-2005, 09:16 AM

I get this kind false judgement sometimes from people I know who think just cuz I work from home and have icq open it's not really considered work.

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#21

03-10-2005, 09:17 AM

I think it's the general assumption everyone makes when you work at home. I actually stopped answering the door if I wasn't warned ahead of time that they were coming and I only answer the phone if I'm expecting a call - hidden numbers go straight to the voicemail The bills don't get paid from chatting unless you're a webcam host.
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Yo Adrian

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#22

03-10-2005, 09:17 AM

Originally posted by FunForOne

we talked about this yesterday.

Didn't read it.. sorry lol

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ronaldo

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#23

03-10-2005, 09:17 AM

The problem isn't really my wife, but other people who think I can come and go as I please.

I just had my wife quit her job to help me out with some other stuff, so now she'll be working at home too. That's fine with us both.

The problem is her MOM all of a sudden thinks she's RETIRED and can take days off at a time.

I told my wife I don't care about her going away this first time, but if it becomes a habit, ONE of us will be having a little chat with her mother.
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#24

03-10-2005, 09:18 AM

I just asked my wife her thoughts, she said to go get an office :-)
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#25

03-10-2005, 09:19 AM

have u showed her what exactly u are doing to show her that u are working and not cybersexing with richard?
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Yo Adrian

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#26

03-10-2005, 09:19 AM

Originally posted by MikeB_CE

I just asked my wife her thoughts, she said to go get an office :-)

I think I just might

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Prof.Dr. Den

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#27

03-10-2005, 09:20 AM

i feel your pain man, no women no cry
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Yo Adrian

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#28

03-10-2005, 09:20 AM

Originally posted by mistress69

have u showed her what exactly u are doing to show her that u are working and not cybersexing with richard?

naw she's cool with my cyber affair with him

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#29

03-10-2005, 09:22 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

Does your wife ever get all over your shit because she doesn't realize that the time you spend online is WORK and that it's necessary to pay the BILLS?

We just moved into a new home, the move cost me 2 weeks of offline time, wifey's a stay at home mom. The minute my broadband got connected I've been working long hours to catch up.

Makes sense right? Spending time working to pay the bills after a long & expensive move?

But just because of the fact that I'm HOME makes her think I'm just messin' around.. "chatting" as she calls it. Keeps bitching at me to help her around the house.

I told her if I don't work, we can't pay the rent. Pissed her off, she thinks I'm being a drama queen. Something tells me that I may be in the market to lease some office space soon.

This happen to anyone else, or am I really just being a dick about it?

Kick her to da curb.
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xlogger

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#30

03-10-2005, 09:23 AM

Damn how fast did this thread get 30 replies, i guess many people in here relate to YoAdrian. Sucks for you guys who are married.

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FunForOne

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#31

03-10-2005, 09:24 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

Didn't read it.. sorry lol

no problem. Its a very important topic to me.

My wife is pissed
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L0stMind

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#32

03-10-2005, 09:24 AM

If this is a serious job for you, treat it that way. Get incorporated, get an office, write off everything you can. You'll be more productive at the office (less distractions), family and friends will think you are actually working and leave you alone (for the most part).

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#33

03-10-2005, 09:25 AM

Originally posted by xlogger

<-- great show, why was it cancelled?!

coming back this summer!
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Jason

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#34

03-10-2005, 09:25 AM

i got the chatting thing for a long time.. get an office. (when you can)

lifesaver.

I stay busy.
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#35

03-10-2005, 09:25 AM

I had this problem a few years ago when I worked from home ... and in fact continue to have the same problem when I'm working from home on the weekends or evenings. My solution was to find somewhere else to work. MikeB was right ... if you're at home, or working from home, it is perceived by others as just being lazy. The problem wasn't even localized to my girlfriend, all of my friends at that time were in college and would constantly hound me to come out because all I do is "sit and fuck around on the computer all day." I can especially relate to the chatting bit ... that pisses me off like no other when they say that all I do is chat. The only solution that worked for me long term was to get an office with Brett and the guys so we'd all have a place to disappear to during the day. Unfortunately .. while alleviating some of our strains this also led to a few new problems .. like the 9-5 mentality, etc. By now tho, we've all pretty much been able to get things figured out over the past several months and each person now has a schedule, lifestyle, and workstyle that is ideal for himself.

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Jace

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#36

03-10-2005, 09:27 AM

I have the same problem, and there is no curing it...cause no matter how hard you work, SHE WORKED HARDER when she gets home

I found a great solution for our house. She usually sleeps in til about 2-3pm...and I usually wake up VERY early cause of my insomnia (about 4 hours of sleep a night)...so I just bust ass from about 9am-1pm and get everything done that requires tons of attention...then when she wakes up I can do shit with her and do that half assed work thing at the same time

sometimes it is flawed, but works out most of the time..like right this minute

also, i have an office upstairs that I work out of too...and she knws most of the time that when go up in there it is when I need some quiet work time...so she usually leaves me alone up there.....and every now and then I will run downstairs looking frantic real quick and run upstairs again, like I am working on something really tedious and CAN NOT be disturbed

the trick is to make her think your job is really stressful, even though it is on the computer and she doesn't see the stress...get pissed every now and then and freak out about something small, but so that she realizes something is wrong and you NEED to be at that computer....it is all a mind game

haha
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Yo Adrian

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#37

03-10-2005, 09:28 AM

Originally posted by L0stMind

If this is a serious job for you, treat it that way. Get incorporated, get an office, write off everything you can. You'll be more productive at the office (less distractions), family and friends will think you are actually working and leave you alone (for the most part).

I am incorporated, twice actually. The new home is built with an office, we figured the cost of the place with an office would be cheaper than a smaller place and leasing office space. I'm totally screwed my friends.

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#38

03-10-2005, 09:29 AM

I think its funny that your wife refers to you as a "drama queen" LMAO!

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Thurbs

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#39

03-10-2005, 09:31 AM

(10:30:09) Yo Adrian: I see enough chicks nude all day bro ;) ... thats prolly what pisses her off, u need to get an office, one like mine.
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MikeB

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#40

03-10-2005, 09:31 AM

Originally posted by JaceXXX

I have the same problem, and there is no curing it...cause no matter how hard you work, SHE WORKED HARDER when she gets home

I found a great solution for our house. She usually sleeps in til about 2-3pm...and I usually wake up VERY early cause of my insomnia (about 4 hours of sleep a night)...so I just bust ass from about 9am-1pm and get everything done that requires tons of attention...then when she wakes up I can do shit with her and do that half assed work thing at the same time

sometimes it is flawed, but works out most of the time..like right this minute

also, i have an office upstairs that I work out of too...and she knws most of the time that when go up in there it is when I need some quiet work time...so she usually leaves me alone up there.....and every now and then I will run downstairs looking frantic real quick and run upstairs again, like I am working on something really tedious and CAN NOT be disturbed

the trick is to make her think your job is really stressful, even though it is on the computer and she doesn't see the stress...get pissed every now and then and freak out about something small, but so that she realizes something is wrong and you NEED to be at that computer....it is all a mind game

haha

Interesting. Side note: my experience with this was back in 1998...yes 1998. And when I asked her for some opinions today, I still detected some bitterness about it. March 10, 2005.
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#41

03-10-2005, 09:31 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

I am incorporated, twice actually. The new home is built with an office, we figured the cost of the place with an office would be cheaper than a smaller place and leasing office space. I'm totally screwed my friends.

just make it known to her that your work is serious...i had to do it with my wife, and when my income went down one month cause i wasn't on task, she realized very quickly I need to be on the computer more than she wants me to be
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#42

03-10-2005, 09:32 AM

Originally posted by MikeB_CE

Interesting. Side note: my experience with this was back in 1998...yes 1998. And when I asked her for some opinions today, I still detected some bitterness about it. March 10, 2005.

haha, jeez...women can really carry shit with them huh? it amazes me sometimes
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#43

03-10-2005, 09:34 AM

Originally posted by JaceXXX

haha, jeez...women can really carry shit with them huh? it amazes me sometimes

Honestly, I had forgotten about the whole thing until I read this thread today.
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#44

03-10-2005, 09:36 AM

women are strange creatures
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Yo Adrian

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#45

03-10-2005, 09:36 AM

Originally posted by thurbs

(10:30:09) Yo Adrian: I see enough chicks nude all day bro ;) ... thats prolly what pisses her off, u need to get an office, one like mine.

That office was mine for years bro... couldn't you tell my the crusty stains on my carpet under the desk?

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Yo Adrian

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#46

03-10-2005, 09:37 AM

Originally posted by JaceXXX

just make it known to her that your work is serious...i had to do it with my wife, and when my income went down one month cause i wasn't on task, she realized very quickly I need to be on the computer more than she wants me to be

Interesting.. not a bad idea. Thanks for sharing the experience

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Thurbs

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#47

03-10-2005, 09:37 AM

those crusty stains are priceless heirlooms now.
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#48

03-10-2005, 09:39 AM

Well, if you've built an office into the house, and she hounds you when you are in your new office... shit, I'd be pissed.

Then, I'd find an office outside the home. Explain to her how you HAVE to rent an office now, cuz *she* fucked up the original money saving plan. Show her how much money you are gonna lose from renting an office. Then, explain that this cost is gonna have to be recouped by long hours of work at the new, rented office.

Give her a kiss and head out the door to go sign the rental agreement... (don't be rude about it all). I bet you she will call you in 15 mins and promise to not bother you ever again while you are in the office at home.

hehe

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#49

03-10-2005, 09:39 AM

Originally posted by MikeB_CE

Interesting. Side note: my experience with this was back in 1998...yes 1998. And when I asked her for some opinions today, I still detected some bitterness about it. March 10, 2005.

I feel ya ... the instant I crack my laptop at home, my girlfriend rolls here eyes at me and walks out of the room. ... either that or she tries the "intervention" method by saying "can I check my email??" and then hoarding my laptop for the next hour .... EVEN THOUGH SHE HAS HER OWN LAPTOP :-P

-TaDoW

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#50

03-10-2005, 09:40 AM

Originally posted by Yo Adrian

Does your wife ever get all over your shit because she doesn't realize that the time you spend online is WORK and that it's necessary to pay the BILLS?

We just moved into a new home, the move cost me 2 weeks of offline time, wifey's a stay at home mom. The minute my broadband got connected I've been working long hours to catch up.

Makes sense right? Spending time working to pay the bills after a long & expensive move?

But just because of the fact that I'm HOME makes her think I'm just messin' around.. "chatting" as she calls it. Keeps bitching at me to help her around the house.

I told her if I don't work, we can't pay the rent. Pissed her off, she thinks I'm being a drama queen. Something tells me that I may be in the market to lease some office space soon.

This happen to anyone else, or am I really just being a dick about it?

More common than you think. My ex used to bitch and complain that I did the same thing, since the ICQ would go off all the time.

She didn't have a problem spending the money though.
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