Michael Jackson Joke!
 

Michael Jackson was on a ship with 100 boy scouts when it hit an iceberg and started to sink.
The captain announced "We're sinking! Everyone abandon ship!"
Michael asked, "What about the children?"
The captain replied, "F*ck the children!"
Michael looked around eagerly and asked "Do we have time?"

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

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huhu :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Just then a priest yells "OK MICHAEL LETS FUCK THE CHILDREN!"
and a jew jumps in and replies "... Out of what?"

ehhh....that was funny :uhoh

Ok, so this one might be better?
 

A guy in a mask bursts into a sperm bank with a shotgun. 'Open the fucking safe' he yells at the woman behind the counter.' 'But we're not a real bank' she replies, 'we don't have any money, this is a sperm bank' 'Don't argue, open the fucking safe or I'll blow your head off' says the guy with the gun. She obliges and once she's opened the safe door the guy says 'Take out one of the bottles and drink it.' 'But it's full of sperm!' she replies nervously. 'Don't argue, just drink it' he says. She prises the cap off and gulps it down. 'Take out another one and drink it too he demands. She takes out another and drinks it as well. Suddenly, the guy pulls off the mask and to the women's amazement it's her husband. 'There, ' he says 'it's not that fucking difficult is it!?!"

:1orglaugh The last one was better

Thanks! How about this one?
 

THE NINE MOST IMPORTANT MEN IN A WOMAN'S LIFE:

1. THE DOCTOR: because he says : "Take your clothes off"
2. THE DENTIST: because he says : "Open wide"
3. THE HAIRDRESSER: because he says : "Do you want it teased or blown"
4. THE MILKMAN: because he says : "Do you want it in the front or the back?" 5. THE INTERIOR DECORATOR: because he says : "Once it's in, you'll love it"
6. THE SHARE BROKER: because he says : "It will rise gradually and maintain it's peak for a long-long-long time"
7. THE BANKER: because he says : "If you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest
8. THE HUNTER: because he "Goes deep in the bush, shoots twice and always eats what he shoots"
9. THE TELKOM GUY: because he says : "Would you like it on the table or against the wall. And the most annoying is FATHER CHRISTMAS...the bastard only comes once a year!